13 and depressed....its a struggle

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New Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 7/21/2009 12:11 PM (GMT -6)   
hey everyone. so i found out i have this thing called post traumatic depression syndrome and its really hard to go through..especially at such a young age like me. i mean i thought i was depressed at first but now i know for sure and to me its scary. about a year ago my mom abused me and sad thing is i dont even know what i did to make her mad.she told me to leave and go to school and if im not there i would be sorry. i didnt feel like waiting for the bus so i walked half-way then a teacher stopped to give me a ride to school. she asked me if i was ok and i said yes im just fighting with my mom...but she knew other things were going by the look in my eyes and the red mark on my face. she asked me if i wanted her to call the police and i said no but she did anyway and that made my mom furious. she hated me because she thought i did it. i was pretty mad to because i never told them to and they cost my relation-ship with my own mother. our relation-ship since then was kinda patchy. we got mad at each other more easily but no more abuse happened...luckily.about a year later which would be 2 sundays ago i started having trauma and i kept getting flashbacks and i was shaking un-controllably. i had streak marks from where my tears were rolling and i kept blacking out. it was scary and i didnt know what to do. ever since then i keep hearing things and seeing things like images of the abuse day. my mind has been playing serious games with me. i have been sad for a while i just didnt say anything and i just put a smile on to try and please the people around me but the only person i coulndt fool was my dad. he knew something was going on he just didnt bother to ask. a couple nights ago my mom and i got in a fight and she started saying things that offended me because they were about my dad. i deffended my dad and my mom got mad and said, "ok you know what i hate you. your out of my life for good and you can walk back over to your dads house. im done with you." my dad picked me up and i got put into counceling but it isnt helping and things have gotten harder ever since my dad died yesterday and i found out i might possibly be pregnant...this is really tough and scary for me and i just dont know what to do any more. everyone looks at me and says oh her life is perfect. shes a cheerleader..shes got everything but really no one knows untill they live in my shoes for a day. im confused and in doubt and i need advice and help..i want a way out of this whole of anger and pain...
-?still questioning?-

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1190
   Posted 7/21/2009 2:53 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Barbie,

I’m glad you came here to join our group. There are quite a few people here in the Depression forum, and on the Anxiety & Panic forum, who suffer from post-traumatic stress, and we do understand how scary and overwhelming it can be. I’m sorry the counseling isn’t helping you…..maybe you need a different counselor. I hope you will talk to your doctor about that, and try to get a different referral. I also hope you will discuss the possibility of pregnancy with your doctor as well. Missing a period can be caused by a number of different factors, including stress, but you should really get a good physical checkup and find out what’s going on.

Please accept my heartfelt condolences on the loss of your father. I am so sorry…..you must feel a terrible sadness, especially with being estranged from your mom. I hope you will talk to someone about this – maybe a teacher or counselor at school. You need support right now.

I’m also sorry that your mom has been verbally and physically abusive towards you. I think your teacher had a legal obligation to report the abuse, and in my opinion, she did the right thing. Your mom has no right to do the things she has done to you. You deserve to be loved and cared for, Barbie.

I’m not sure what else I can suggest to you about your situation. You are so young to be dealing with all of this, and without parental support. Please talk to an adult who you feel you can trust…..it’s very important that you find someone to confide in about all the issues you’re dealing with. Also, please see your doctor about your suspected pregnancy. I’m concerned about you, and want you to have the best care possible. Please stick with us, and keep us posted. ((((hugs))))
Moderator, Depression Forum
“Hope is the pillar that holds up the world.”  ~Pliny the Elder



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