What to do....

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FamilyGuy
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 3310
   Posted 10/11/2004 8:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello everyone, I'm from the Crohn's board.  After being officially dx'd w/crohn's in January, I've been put on the diagnosis rollercoaster once again.  Now they think I may have Celiac's disease.  My theory is that I may have both.
 
Needless to say, I've been really, truly, deeply depressed.  My pcp put me on Lexapro 10mg.  On Friday, I told him I didn't seem to notice any difference.  He said he didn't want to "experiment with any others until my upper scope with my GI is done in November.  So we dicontinued the Lexapro.  I guess the reason I didn't notice any difference was that it was keeping me from not getting even more deeply depressed.
 
I've spent the entire weekend crying/wanting to cry.  I feel like I'm losing my grip on things.  Adrift, empty, washed out.  My wife has been so supportive through all of this, now she is saying that it is her fault I'm depressed.  I hate making her feel like that, it is all me.  I'm the reason I'm depressed, not her.  I love her, always have, always will.  She is the love of my life, there will never be another, period.
 
Doc didn't return my call today, want to try something, anything. 
 
Thanks for reading, hope you are all doing better.
Jon
 
"The man who insists upon seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides. Accept life, and you must accept regret."
-- Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821-81), Swiss philosopher, poet


JohnD
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 10/12/2004 3:06 AM (GMT -7)   
Family Guy,
hey fellow Crohnie, I don't have any reallly good advise, but i just wanted you to know your not alone......I'd think there was something wrong with you if you weren't down...with all the crap you've been going threw.......the only thing i can say is to only consern yourself with the thjings you are dealing with at any one time......don't worry about tomarrow.....and the things you have no controle over...try to not let them get to you....easy to say, i know....I very glad you have such a wonderful wife......don't forget to let her know how lucky you feel to have her in your life......mine is the same for me....it makes her feel weird when i tell her but i think it does me as much good to tell her as it is for her to hear it.....you take care of you self my friend.....and if you need to talk to someone about something.......my IM name is .. hybridpops

things will get better.....

JohnD

softy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2004
Total Posts : 798
   Posted 10/12/2004 1:21 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Jon.  I'm from the crohn's board too just have no diagnosis.  Two doctors thought I had crohn's and did testing on me but all tests are coming back normal.  The pain and others symptoms have beaten me into depression so I am taking Celexa for the past bit.  Sometimes I try to convince myself I'm just crazy and creating all the pain :-) .  Like someone would do that.  Anyhoo, I know most anti-depressants take 4-6 weeks for the full effects to take place.  Were you on Laxapro for that long?  I'm thinking that maybe you could take your wife into the dr. with you and she could speak on your behalf about how bad things are so you could get something now.  Also, try to get out into the sunshine for a walk at least once a day even if you have to force yourself.  Best wishes and prayers are being sent you way Jon for answers and peace :-) .
God Bless, Softy


tabbyprincess
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2003
Total Posts : 684
   Posted 10/12/2004 6:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Family guy,
I'm from crohn's board too, but have suffered with depression for years. I'm on celexa too. I take 60mg now. Before celexa I was on zoloft. YOu might want to ask your pcp about a referral to a psychiatrist and even a counselor/therapist. Then you could take your wife with you to the counselor. Also, the psychiatrist can prescibe meds and will know more about the antidepressants. It sounds like you really do need something in the way of medicine. I've been there with the crying all the time and even wanting to hurt myself. All I can say is that I will be praying for you, and be persistent with your doctor untll you get something! Please keep us posted.

Stacie

Saetyl
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 97
   Posted 10/15/2004 9:31 PM (GMT -7)   
FamilyGuy,
As someone who is in a relationship with a guy who has moderate/severe Crohn's and occasional depression, I can empathize with your wife. However, I will share with you something my sig. other told me. One day out of the blue he sat me down alone in our bedroom and shut the door to drown out the other noises in the apartment, and he made me promise not to talk until he was finished (which is hard for me to say NOTHING at all, since I am always trying to be supportive). I agreed, though. He then told me some of the sweetest things I've ever heard from anyone's mouth. He explained to me in his own words, that I was the only one who ever truly helped him through the everyday pain of life with Crohn's Disease. He told me that he was so thankful to have found someone so understanding and so supportive, so willing to be completely selfless toward him. He told me it was rare enough to find someone like that for a healthy person, let alone someone who would have a major disease for the rest of his life. He told me he wasn't feeling well and it was an emotional distruption. That was when he explained that he was very much used to feeling sick physically but that sometimes the pain is actually worse emotionally (which says a lot and spoke to me since I see how much physical pain he is in all the time). He wanted me to know that he may take it out on me at times, but he didn't mean to ever do that, and he wanted me to know that I was the only person in the world he cared about. That life was worthwhile because of me, all the pain and suffering physically and emotionally would never compare to the greatness of the love we have.
That talk with stick with me for the rest of my life. My suggestion is that you talk to your wife frankly about your emotions. If you say "it's not you, it's me" she will not hear you. If you tell her how happy she makes you and give examples of some of the special things she does for you, she will have no choice but to believe you.
Trust me. It helps relieve the emotional pain of your partner.

Sorry so long.

georgialady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 1169
   Posted 10/16/2004 3:03 PM (GMT -7)   
:-) ''familyguy''this is ''georgia lady''i know it's hard to hear that
things will be okay from all us[i have crohns too10yrs.]i also have
been married25+yrs.got crohns the worst the last 10 when life was
suppose to be the best--retired,kids out on their own could travel if
not for this ''d''disease..it was a total life change for me and my mate
he's perfectly healthy and me the dumps and in the dumps most of
the time learned one thing---they love us and sometimes we just need
to open up to them---i learned to say ''no''i just don't feel good today
and ''not''feel guilty or blame them or myself...you and i are lucky we
have someone we love and they love us back--we just need to love
ourselves alittle more with this disease or any disease...i'm sorry for
venting but i think sometimes we are the truly blessed even with crohns.
we learn alot more about our loved ones just by listening and opening
our hearts up.....good luck :-) :-)
''life is what we make of it good or bad''


teddy
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 190
   Posted 10/17/2004 4:25 AM (GMT -7)   
HELLO FRIEND,

NOT HERE TO GIVE ADVICE, JUST WANTING TO LET YOU KNOW, THAT WE UNDERSTAND, AND YES WE ARE VERY LUCKY TO HAVE UNDERSTANDING AND SUPPORTIVE PARTNERS.

YOUR FRIEND - TEDDY

Mello
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 10/20/2004 7:55 AM (GMT -7)   
FG, make sure that you communicate very clearly with your doctor about how you're doing.  Hopefully the endoscopy won't be bad news, but you'll still need to have your symptoms/complaints addressed.  I'm sorry things are so bad at this time.  IBD can be such a curse.   But thank goodness you have a wonderful s.o. to be there for support.
 
 
Edited for clarification

MARIA G
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 10/20/2004 12:21 PM (GMT -7)   
HELLO , IM NEW HERE AS WELL, I HAPPEN TO READ YOUR POST, AND I UNDERSTAND, I'M 31, FROM N.Y. AND THE REASON I BEGAN MONITERING THIS SITE, 2YEARS AGO, WAS BECAUSE MY EX-FIANCE HAS CROHN'S DISEASE. HE WAS ALWAYS VERY SECRET ABOUT IT UNTILL ONE DAY HE TOLD ME WE WERE PICKING MEDICINE UP @ THE HOSPITAL, WELL THIS 10MIN. BECAME 4 1/2 HRS OF HIM RECEIVING REMICADE, (ME NEW TO ALL OF THIS) MADE ME WANT TO READ ALL ABOUT CROHN'S AND HOW I CAN HELP HIM, AND I DID. BELEIVE ME HE SUFFERED AND I TRIED TO HELP HIM IN ALL WAYS, WE GOT ENGAGED LAST CHRISTMAS, MOVED IN TOGETHER, AND THEN 1MONTH AGO HE TELLS ME HE CAN NOT DO THIS, SO THERE I GO NOT UNDERSTANDING W H Y ?, WHEN I DID SO MUCH, SO MUCH LOVE AND IT CAME TO ME MOVING BACK HOME BECAUSE HE NEEDS TIME, ALONG WITHE REMICADE, HE TAKES 6MP AND NOW SINCE JUNE PAXIL. I'M HERE NOW BECAUSE I'M DEPRESSED. IM ALONE, IN QUSETION, I FEEL SUCH AN EMPTYNESS THAT I DONT KNOW HOW I WAKE UP EVERY MORNING. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH THAT I WOULD HAVE DONE ANYTHING TO SAVE THIS RELATIONSHIP, I GAVE HIM SO MUCH CONFIDENCE THAT I HAVE NONE LEFT FOR MYSELF. I AM CURRENTLY ON XANEX AND LEXAPRO MIXED, I JUST STARTED. I FEEL FOR ALL OF YOU.

Mello
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 10/21/2004 9:21 AM (GMT -7)   
Family Guy, any follow-up?  Hoping things are getting better?

chaz76
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 29
   Posted 10/24/2004 7:44 PM (GMT -7)   

 Family Guy,

I understand where you are coming from as well. I don't have crohns disease but I do have Epilepsy. Ever sense I was really young, I was depressed but when I was dx with epilepsy it had gotten worse. Everyday it still does. I've been epileptic for 14yrs. I'm 28, never drove a car in my life but I do have a healthy little girl that will be 2 this Dec. A lot of teasing went on during school, a lot of other bad things happen to where I can't even look in the mirror anymore, and now with all of the meds that I'm on my memory is not to great. I get yelled at or have people make me feel stupid. I was married to a guy for 4yrs but he called my parents up and said I was a burden to him, plus he knew that my money was all gone. (I had a settlement after the accident that caused me to become epileptic). I am now with my recent husband that I have a daughter with. He is wonderful and he does his best to support me, but he just gets too aggravated at me too easily about how bad my memory is. I get yelled at for the samething over and over again and I have gotten to the point where I beat myself up before anyone has the chance to beat me up. I want to know what can I do for myself. I don't want to be put on anymore meds because I'm already dopped up as it is. I've been on Prosac before but caused seizures to accure more. I just wish there was like a project handbook that I can go by to help me through this. I do hope things go good for you and you get to feeling better. This will be most likely my only post. Take care of yourself.

 


FamilyGuy
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 3310
   Posted 10/25/2004 8:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Things are slightly better. Still waiting for the Cymbalta to work its magic. I was on the Lexapro for 9 weeks. Will try to keep you all posted on my progress. Thank you all for your kind words, they have truly helped.

Thoughts & prayers are with you all,
Jon
 
"The man who insists upon seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides. Accept life, and you must accept regret."
-- Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821-81), Swiss philosopher, poet


Mello
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 10/26/2004 8:13 AM (GMT -7)   
Okay, I hope this doesn't seem lame, but I'm relived that you just put that somewhat reassuring post up, FG.  Haha.  I hope that it's the beginning of a positive trend for you.

FamilyGuy
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 3310
   Posted 11/9/2004 12:22 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello everyone. Well, I've been on the Cymbalta for a month now. It seems to be helping a little more than the Lexapro was, but still seems to be leave me wanting. I have an appointment with my PCP tomorrow and I will discuss meds and possibly seeing a counselor. I just seem to have clammed up. I can't and won't talk to my family--I'm not going to put them through this. I guess I just would feel better talking to an independent party about how I feel. I feel like I've put my family through so much dealing with my health issues that I don't want to burden them any further.

Hope you are all doing better,
Jon
 
"The man who insists upon seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides. Accept life, and you must accept regret."
-- Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821-81), Swiss philosopher, poet


FamilyGuy
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 3310
   Posted 11/10/2004 9:41 PM (GMT -7)   
Well, the doc switched me from Cymbalta to Wellbutrin today. Yet another 4 weeks to see if there is any effect.

Heavy sigh...........


Jon
 
"The man who insists upon seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides. Accept life, and you must accept regret."
-- Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821-81), Swiss philosopher, poet


teddy
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 190
   Posted 11/21/2004 10:20 PM (GMT -7)   
HANG IN THERE FAMILY GUY, REMEMBER WE ARE HERE FOR YOU.

TAKE CARE
TEDDY

FamilyGuy
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 3310
   Posted 3/18/2005 11:41 PM (GMT -7)   
The WellbutrinXL has been working, but it is becoming less effective. Was wondering what dosage people were on. I'm on 300mg, wondering if I need a dosage adjustment or if I need to talk to a CSW/psychiatrist? If my medical dx was a little more secure it would help....
Jon
 
"The man who insists upon seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides. Accept life, and you must accept regret."
-- Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821-81), Swiss philosopher, poet


JohnD
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 3/19/2005 7:24 AM (GMT -7)   
hey, Jon.
I take WellbutrinXL also. I'm at 400mg a day. been on it for a few months now. seemed to be a wonder drug for a while, but i don't think it's working as well as it was before. infact, i was gonna probably go back to the doc VERY soon to see what he has to say about it. hope things get straightened out soon for ya. JohnD
Married w/ four kids.
Had problems since age 13.
Dx'd with Crohn's in Spring of 1991.
Resection that December.
Long remission.
Had follow up surgery December of 2004.
 
Still Here!! 
 

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