New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

xela
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 8/19/2009 11:08 PM (GMT -7)   
lately i have been really frustrated easily. i don't know what it is, but almost everything has been up setting me. i have been with this great guy for almost two years. but its like he has gotten so lazy. not just with himself, but with US. and i cant deal with it. i try so hard to act like it isn't bugging me so i don't look crazy or like I'm freaking out, but it gets so annoying because i don't get lazy with our relationship? he is 21 and still lives at home, but i totally understand why he does. (due to financial problems that are not because of him) but he loves it, he gets home sick easily and would choose staying home playing video games and taking naps over doing something way fun. and I'm not the type to wanna do something way girlie either. i love out doors stuff and playing soccer and basketball. honestly, i feel like he is holding me back and it hurts because i love him so much. i feel like he has forgotten about how to treat me too. he makes pretty good money, but this whole summer, didn't take me on a single date! i love to spoil my boy and i guess i just want a little in return. and it just makes me sad because there are two great guys who have wanted to get to know me but i turn them down because i don't want that. sometimes i don't know if I'm doing the right thing. i feel like i put all the effort in our relationship. and when we argue, which isn't often, its like my point of view is always wrong. there is no point in even bringing things up with him. maybe i am crazy, but this is all messing with my head and my heart. this is my first time posting anything on here. but i just am too embarrassed to talk about relationship problems with anyone else. thanks for listening if you are.

xela
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 8/19/2009 11:36 PM (GMT -7)   
i just feel under appreciated. i feel like he tells me he is listening but its like he isn't. he tries to tell me that he is the super hero boyfriend and makes me feel like i couldnt find anyone better. even though it hurts becuase i know i can. i feel stuck. lost. frustrated and confused. when it comes down to it, i dont have a family or any close close friends and when i have him, its like i have nothing. i am there 110% for him. but who is there for me? i dont know how to talk to him with out hurting him. but he is very important to me and i love him dearly.

THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18742
   Posted 8/20/2009 1:02 AM (GMT -7)   
xela, hi and welcome to the forum. i am jamie, male, 37 and not lazy!!!!!!!!!! it seems that you have boyfriend, by this i mean a boy. he needs to know how you are feelin', and that you need a man in your lfe. at home, playing video games!! you said he is still living at home but is on a good income? sorry don't get that, furthrmore he sems totally set in his ways, and not taking out his gf, s@#$ i see mine whenever i can. different circumstances, i understand that you love him, but girl he isn't reciprocating that back. not fare or right in my book. i am a 50/50 man, sometimes it chops and changes. so does he want a relationship or does he just want to be with you at his beck and call, time to up the ante with him, esp if he is worthy, if not time to find a man that will want to be in a committed relationship. with loving compassion, jamie. sorry for being a tad direct. i just do not like men who disrespect women, and those who are doing so knowing they can get away with it.
 
jamie.
 
dx, mdd, severe borderline personality disorder.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40565
   Posted 8/20/2009 10:18 AM (GMT -7)   
I do have to mention, when you do things for others, it shouldn't be because you want something in return. Though it is always nice when they do return the favors or gifts, or even be thoughtful of you.

It sounds like you don't have a lot in common. So maybe this isn't the right guy for you. I would think this relationship over thoroughly before moving any farther. Either that or take it one step at a time and see what happens. The ball is in your court. You are the one to make the decisions.

Best wishes to you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 8/20/2009 3:32 PM (GMT -7)   
It sounds to me like you have situational depression but remember I am not a physician.
I feel like you are not loving yourself but in a situation that you could change and your world may right itself.
When a source of stress in your life is particularly hard to cope with, you may react with symptoms of sadness, fear, or even hopelessness. This type of reaction is often referred to as situational depression.
I would really look hard at your relationship with your boyfriend.
 
Good Luck,
Kitt
 

Kitt,
Moderator: Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn
Anxiety/Panic, & Depression
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
Not a mental health professional of any kind


xela
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 8/21/2009 9:36 AM (GMT -7)   
thanks everyone. and he is cool, and i know he loves me. i just feel like im un noticed by everyone sometimes and when i look to him its like he is so i dont know dumb about things. and i dont think i should get things in return but after a while, i start to wonder why. i feel like i would do anything to be with him but he would rather just relax at home, he says i can always come over but i get sick of it after a while. but thanks everyone. i just have had a lot on my mind and it hurts that my relationship is one of those things. i just need to learn to let go of things that have upset me but i dont really know how. it keeps me up all night and i have tried almost everything (yoga meditation, relaxation and sleeping medicines) but nothing helps. i dont know why i hold grudges or what it is, but if anyone has an idea how to fix it i would like to know.

loves
xela

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40565
   Posted 8/21/2009 9:15 PM (GMT -7)   
It sounds like maybe you are thinking too much. I take a mood stabilizer and that helps with obsessive thinking.

Maybe you should talk to your doctor about that. It might help, he/she might have more insight on to what type of medication that you should be taking.

Best wishes,

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Friday, December 02, 2016 1:15 PM (GMT -7)
There are a total of 2,731,736 posts in 300,955 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 151128 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, Diane82256.
289 Guest(s), 10 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
Artist Mark, tennisplayer, Mrs. Brady, Girlie, Park12, Hilander64, 5678, bdavis, Myself 09, fransherrell


Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook  Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter  Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
Advertisement
Advertisement

©1996-2016 HealingWell.com LLC  All rights reserved.

Advertise | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer