Deployment hurts

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New Member

Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 8/29/2009 5:09 PM (GMT -6)   
 I'm having the hardest time dealing with being an Army wife. I'm constantly crying and can't hardly seem to function. Dealing with the fact that my husband is not here has been very difficult. I flip flop between overeating and not eating. Sleep is the same way...either too much or hardly at all. I dont't know how to deal with all this. I try to keep it from the kids that it's bothering me but I'm sure they've already noticed. I just don't know what to do. I feel like I've hit bottom.

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 8/29/2009 5:53 PM (GMT -6)   
Welcome to HealingWell and I am sorry your hubby is deployed.  Everyone here in USA is so very grateful and proud of our servicemen.  A hug thank you to your husband and to you for loving an "army man".
It does sound like you anxiety is overwhelming you.  May I suggest you see your physician and discuss your anxiety/depression  with him/her as you may need some therapy to help you through the axiety and depression you are feeling.
There are numerous ways to treat and deal with anxiety. I say that the best way to fight it is to learn about it. Do some reading on anxiety (particularly types of anxiety that match what you feel, such as the fear of crowds.) When you start to understand what anxiety is and how it actually works, you'll be better able to fight it off. When you learn to fight it off, you are put into control.

Understanding Depression By Patricia Ainsworth is a good book on depression.

Also click on our resource directory near the top of this page and you will find many great ideas.

We are here to support you and please do feel free to talk with us. 
Gentle Hugs


Moderator: Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn
Anxiety/Panic, & Depression
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"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
Not a mental health professional of any kind

New Member

Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 8/29/2009 6:31 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks.  I'll definitely do some reading.  I have the worst nightmares that something terrible is going to happen. I feel so upset sometimes that I feel the need to disassociate myself from him so as not to be hurt if something does happen. I have never felt this way in my life.  Knowing his particular job really makes it worse.
I hope the doctor can help. I can't go on like this for the whole deployment. It's really affecting my family and me.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40386
   Posted 8/30/2009 1:11 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Armywife84,

I am so glad that you have come to join us. I think the forum can help you. Being able to talk to somebody about it makes it a little easier.

I do agree with Kitt, I think that you should talk to your doctor about going to therapy. A good therapist can really help you through this. You will learn ways to cope. And you don't want to disassociate yourself from him. He is your husband and you love him. Plus you want to keep communications open with him, especially when he is gone. Have faith. Know that things will be okay. You can get through this, and we will help you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18548
   Posted 8/30/2009 3:39 AM (GMT -6)   
hi armywife. i am jamie. just wanted to pop in and offer you my support. my best mate is a returned servicemen. alike you he has great difficulties, he puts on all sort of brave faces. he is very stoic, straight up, although he is a little emotive he definately would see it as a weakness to truely express his feelings. maybe you can receive assistance from the department/area your husband is serving. also i know that within some countries there are support groups for men and women. i would suggest you get in contact with the section your hubby is serving and see what services are available. i wish you well. i admire your courage in posting. with loving compassion. jamie
dx, mdd, severe borderline personality disorder.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted 8/30/2009 9:13 AM (GMT -6)   
Therapy and meds can really help honey. There is a reason why zoloft is called the military wife vitamen, because it is so extremely stressful to be a military spouse. It is very difficult to deal with deployments and maybe these might help you.
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Make sure your suffering has meaning…

Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 9/1/2009 7:08 PM (GMT -6)   
Is there an organization where military wives can get together and support each other--also maybe help with each others kids, etc.?

We're as proud of you and your sacrifice as we are of our guys overseas.

I pray that hs angel  be with him and protect him.

Post Edited (Korissa) : 9/1/2009 6:11:56 PM (GMT-6)

Elite Member

Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 10404
   Posted 9/1/2009 9:19 PM (GMT -6)   
FLYlady has a forum for military spouses: perhaps you might enjoy exploring that forum and talking with some of the other spouses (mostly wives) there?

Here is the URL:

I'm sorry about the stress and anxiety you're feeling. It must be a horrible time for all of you.

Co-Moderator Crohn's Forum.

Medications for Crohn's ~~ Diet and Nutritional Therapy for Crohn's ~~ Dealing with Abscesses and Fistulae ~~

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