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Expat31
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 9/20/2009 5:36 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm taking what im thinking is possibly my first step to a long road to recovery....
 
A bit of a background on myself, is Im a 31 year old Cdn male, I am one of 7 siblings, 2 of which have already been diagnosed and treated for depression. I seemed to think that somehow I had escaped it, but I think it's caught up with me and only now am I starting to accept it. I'm often a very happy, confident person, but in the last few years ive had numerous "episodes" where I've completely lost self-control and acted out in ways I would never think possible (Crashing my car into a snow bank, punching holes in the wall, giving myself a concussion) thus hurting loved ones and myself, I usually wake up the next day thinking it was a one-time thing and it'll never happen again. But these episodes have been alot more frequent in the last few months so I'm starting to think there may be more to this.
 
I've been doing alot of online reasearch in the last 48 hours about this condition. I can relate to many other people who have posted, but not to all. I don't drink to cover up the pain, i've injured myself intentionally, but never contemplated suicide (am I far off though?)
 
I've considered calling the local crisis center for help, but am shy and perfer to hide behind a monitor for now. Based on my username, im currently in another country (Which I dont think is impacting my condition, but I could be wrong), I would consider speaking to my family doctor, but I won't be home for another few months.  Im sure the no-brainer here would be to talk to my siblings, but the reality is im quite embarassed about and don't think im ready to take that step just yet.
 
Was just looking for some advice on how to "get started".  Thanks :)
 
 

Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 9/20/2009 7:15:15 AM (GMT-6)


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 9/20/2009 6:24 AM (GMT -7)   

Expat,

Welcome to HealingWell !  I have found the support, validation and encouragement that I receive here, to be so helpful and healing. I hope and trust that will be your experience as a member of the HW family.

I am sorry to hear you are struggling and I read your post carefully.  You mention drinking so I am not sure if that is an issue for you and you also mention reckless behavior which does sound to me like you are in need of some medical evaluation.

I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this tough time and we are here to support you.  We do, however, tend to encourage people to seek medical advise re a diagnosis. We are peer support only and can not take the place of a professional.

I am glad you have read through the stories.  Each person has their own unique story and you may see some of your same problems but no two people are the same.  Please know we are here to support you as you seek your diagnosis.

Start with making an appointment with a Doctor even if it is not your own family Doctor as I do not feel it is wise for you to wait until you are back home.

Again a warm welcome to HealingWell.

Kitt


 

Kitt,
Moderator: Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn
Anxiety/Panic, & Depression
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
DX: Anxiety, Depression, Osteoarthritis, GERD, Raynaud's syndrome, Skin Cancer and  IBS

Not a mental health professional of any kind


Expat31
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 9/20/2009 6:48 AM (GMT -7)   
appreciate the support Kitt :)
 
For me I feel the first step is just reaching out and talking to someone and hopefully find someone on common ground who I can relate with.
 
Ive been doing alot of reading on this, and I know this is a first step :)

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 9/20/2009 7:01 AM (GMT -7)   

You are right this is the first step and you have made it right here.  You have joined a peer support group. That was a very brave step for you.  :-)

Support groups are a place for people to give and receive both emotional and practical support as well as to exchange information. People with health conditions, as well as their friends and families find support groups to be a valuable resource and get confirmation that their feelings are "normal", educate others, or just let off steam.

I have  given you good advice based on my own life experience.   I have had depression for 27 years and I started by reaching out to a friend when I had my first episode.  This wonderful friend took me to the Doctors and helped me get into therapy.

Coming here to this wonderful site was a great decision and now we will all try to offer our own personal good advice to you.  Take care and be well.

Sincerely,

Kitt

 


 

Kitt,
Moderator: Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn
Anxiety/Panic, & Depression
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
DX: Anxiety, Depression, Osteoarthritis, GERD, Raynaud's syndrome, Skin Cancer and  IBS

Not a mental health professional of any kind


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40578
   Posted 9/20/2009 4:07 PM (GMT -7)   
As you already know, the way you are acting out is a form of self harm. But unfortunately, getting behind the wheel of a car when you are feeling rage could hurt somebody else, so please be careful. When you get the urge to act out, tell yourself three times, "stop, stop, stop". It can slow your mind down and you will think twice about what you are doing and feeling.

It is very important that you see a doctor and get medication to help you. There is something out there, I use to get impulsive like you and I know that there is help. Getting counseling can also help you. So contact your local mental health facility and see what they have to offer. There are programs for people who can't afford it too. So help is out there. Talking here can help too. But you like many others here need some professional guidance. Don't feel alone, you are not. We are all here to let you know that.
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18753
   Posted 9/20/2009 10:17 PM (GMT -7)   
from someone who is living with depression i can firmly state that the combination of therapy and medication has truely been invalueable. you have done well in asking for advice/info. those crisis no's all-round the world are excellent, here in australia they have brought me around from some very scary situations, thus if feeling unsafe, call. please keep posting. with compassion.
 
jamie
 
dx, mdd, severe borderline personality disorder.
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