Another sleepless night

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NightWish
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 129
   Posted 10/19/2009 4:32 AM (GMT -7)   
Didn't get a minute of sleep again tonight. I think I'm going to drop my program. Very sad and depressed and started to feel like I'm neurotic. I just need support that it's OK to give up now because I'm embarrassed to have come this far and I'm worried I'm going to regret it, but I've never felt this terrible in my life. I think I'm going to have some serious health problems if I stay here another semester. I don't know how I'm going to make it through another eight weeks. What in the world did I do in my life to end up this miserable. I'm going to make an appointment with a counselor tomorrow.
Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to find it. -Tori Amos


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18757
   Posted 10/19/2009 4:59 AM (GMT -7)   
hi nw. sorry mate. good on you for realising that this is taking a real toll. maybe defering the semester? i wish so bad that you can get some sleep-i am up too!!! you did nothing wrong. depression is an insidious beast, you have been battling this beast with all of your might, yeah it's darn taxing!! you do what is right for you. we are here for you. keep fightin' jamie

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40587
   Posted 10/19/2009 8:57 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Nightwish,

I am sorry that you are going through so much right now. Not getting sleep can really effect us in a bad way. Have you tried sleeping aids? I take ambien and it works well for me. But not every body wants to take them, and I can understand that.

Maybe taking a semester off will take some stress off of you, though I know that would be a last resort for you. For right now, I suggest taking life one day at a time. I know that sounds easier than it is, but try. Depression really does suck. And it also sucks the life out of us. Remember that we are all here for you.

Best wishes for a better day.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


NightWish
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 129
   Posted 10/19/2009 9:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you both so much. My counseling intake appointment was today and they're able to get me someone to talk to tomorrow already. So maybe that will help me gain some perspective on the situation. I came down with a cold late last night so thankfully I am able to take some medicine that should help me sleep. I also bought a sleep-aid just for nights when I just really can't fall asleep by myself. I think that will make a world of difference because at least I won't be exhausted. I like your suggestion of taking one day at a time, Karen. Another friend told me to do that and I think that's the best. I think I project so far into the future and it ends up making me panic that I'm on the wrong path. Thanks again and I'll update you all soon.
Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to find it. -Tori Amos


SnowyLynne
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 1539
   Posted 10/19/2009 10:01 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm a poor sleeper at night.I refuse to toss & turn so I read,watch tv,get on the 'puter.
If I'm reading in bed I alot of times just go to sleep with whatever i was reading falls on my face,sometimes i will sleep alnite that way,but not often.......i dont worry about it,just go with the flow.......
SnowyLynne


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18757
   Posted 10/20/2009 4:33 AM (GMT -7)   
sweet dreams........be asleep!!! jamie.

Precious Gem
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 1139
   Posted 10/20/2009 6:11 AM (GMT -7)   

Not getting enough sleep makes every little thing seem extra bad.  Please talk to your Dr. about this, if you can get some rest, maybe things will not seem so heavy and burdensome.  I can relate, I am not a great person to be around when I do not sleep.  Maybe take things a bit slower until you feel better.  I know that is easier said than done, especially in the fast paced world we live in.  But sometimes you have to call a halt, take a slower path, maybe a much needed little detour.  I encourage anyone in school to keep at it, but if you sit out one semester to help yourself feel better, so what?  I hope today finds you feeling a bit better.  Everyone here are great listeners and we are always here for you.

Sending peaceful vibes your way wink

Gem


NightWish
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 129
   Posted 10/20/2009 11:35 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I told myself today that even if I'm not completely happy with my situation or the decisions I've made, I'm at least going to be compassionate toward myself and give myself the common courtesy of getting to bed at a decent hour to get enough sleep. Because you're right, walking around like a zombie doesn't do myself or anyone else I meet any good. I am going to stop thinking about what I'm going to do (or not do) next semester and just focus on trying to finish this semester. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers and know that I am doing the same for all of you.

NW
Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to find it. -Tori Amos


OnTheRocks
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2009
Total Posts : 117
   Posted 10/20/2009 11:45 PM (GMT -7)   
If you really feel you're in a bind concerning school, talk to a school counselor, administrator, RA, or anyone who could help set up a temporary leave of absence due to illness. It's been my experience that schools are very understanding when it comes to illness if you explain the situation to them.

THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18757
   Posted 10/21/2009 4:32 AM (GMT -7)   
spot on gcoin!! i dis this. a letter from your doc/pdoc/counsellor should help. good on ya nw for being compassionate to yourself, some excellent self-actualising. you will be okay, i can feel it!! stay strong, thinkin' of ya too. jamie. :-)

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40587
   Posted 10/21/2009 8:02 AM (GMT -7)   
Nightwish,

Give yourself a pat on the back for what you have accomplished. You are doing better than you think, you aer a wonderful person.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Keep on keeping on. You will make it. And yes, focus on what is going on now and let the rest work itself out. You can do this. I have faith in you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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