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janeb
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2004
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 11/12/2004 5:52 AM (GMT -7)   
Hello im new here, cant belive christmas is upon us again, the year seems to have passed so fast, where did it go?
I am Jane, i have 2 children a girl aged 7 called Sophie and a boy aged 12 called Jordon. I have split from my violent husband as just after last christmas he left us after i discovered he had been seeing someone from work behind our back, since he left he hasnt been back in contact and hasnt seen the children.
I cant belive i didnt realise he was cheeting on us, although i had thought about leaving him in the past because of the abuse i never actually thought i would get away so him leaving was a big shock.
It has been hard looking after the children on my own after 12 years of having someone around.
I have recentley been to see my doctor who has said that i am suffering from depresion and anxiety.
I have a part time job which i love, it doesnt pay much but enough to pay the bills and keep the kids fed and warm which is all that matters really. Its just that im worried about christmas, what with it being just around the corner, i have no savings for presents anymore because all the money i did have saved has been now spent on new uniforms for the kids for school and things which my ex would usually of paid for. On other years i would have save a bit of money to buy presents, but this year i dont know what i am going to do. Sometimes i feal angry at the ex for leaving us, sometimes i feal sad because im alone, sometimes i feal worthless, sometimes i feal guilty because i cant get he kids things they want, and alot of the time i feal tired and like i cant go on.
I just want one day of fealling happy, loved, strong and with no worries just for that one day.
thanks for reading this,
jane x

Jeannie143
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 6056
   Posted 11/12/2004 8:34 AM (GMT -7)   
Jane,
Your post reminds me of the year I had pneumonia and because I was always the one who made Christmas happen at our house... well, it didn't happen. It didn't happen the way I usually made it happen, but my kids all pulled together and made a new kind of Christmas with less STUFF and more LOVE. It was quieter and more loving than any Christmas I've experienced before or since. And I found out that my kids weren't all about presents. I got them each something but they really came through for me and fixed dinner and decorated the tree and all. I guess what I'm trying to say is, your kids know dad is gone. They need your unfailing love and the security of you staying by them. Maybe you could all work together to make cookies, decorate the house, and possibly do something for a family that has less than you. Since Christmas is about giving, let your children give... and learn that from giving comes joy. Maybe if you as a family help some others it will make you feel happy, strong and loving. It's worth a try.
~ Jeannie


Ralph
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 139
   Posted 11/12/2004 11:20 AM (GMT -7)   
Jane

Does your husband not have to pay child suppport? I seems he must be legally and certainly morally obliged to help with the cost of raising his children.

It appears that you must have someone to turn to.
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