Dazed and Confused

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moana
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2004
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 11/16/2004 9:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello to all. This is my first time in this forum and I am kind of surprised at some of the posts i've read so far. Reason being, I am not the only one.
 
Well, my story. I was recently diagnosed with depression. My doctor prescribed me wellbutrin and told me to see a psychiatrist. But i'm really scared to reach out. First of all, I hear so many bad things about these medications. Secondly I keep telling myself that my sadness is due to life events that have ocurred to me, and not a chemical flaw. As far as seeing a psychiatrist, I really didn't want to stain any of my medical records with a " mental illness". I know that society is much more aware of certain conditions and that help is out there, but the taboo still exists. It's in every job application I have filled up until today. " Any past mental illness?" I work for a law enforcement agency and I have a very demanding job. I know that if this shows through, I am at the risk of being a victim of prejudice, and the department will take their political actions to make sure I lose access to my current position. I am by no means a threat to anyone. Not even to myself. I have been managing to go through this depression pretty much by myself and I just really want to find
some relief. My husband is unemployed and I have a newborn baby. So my career is very crucial at the moment in order to keep food on our table and a roof over our head. I hate my job with a passion and it really doesn't help to make you any cheery dealing with the worst that society has to offer on a daily basis. I'm working with people that are on crisis everyday. All I wanted in my life right now was to be with my baby at home and not miss on any part of his development.
 
My husband is supportive for most of the time, but he's also very emotionally demanding. If I go down, he goes down or he tells me i'm just being to self concious about this.
Well, i dont want to make this a long boring post. But writting this has helped me understand that my condition is mostly because I dont like my life right now and the things I wish I had are out of my reach, therefore I feel trapped in a whole. This is kind of weird because I have a beautiful healthy child, a wonderful husband and financial stability. But its just so overwhelming.
I need help, I wanna be able to smile again with my heart and I'm really desperate here.
 
 

JohnD
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 11/18/2004 10:10 AM (GMT -7)   
i only have a second to say this (i'm at the end of lunch right now) but your not alone!!! life is overwhelming sometimes. and to long periods of time too. i've been there and am still strugling with it . recently i was put on some meds for it (i've been on a few different types) but this on seems to be helping.....Welbutrin XL

keep plugging along, stinks i know, but it will get better......ask about the webutrin "XL" i was on a different type of welbutrin before that didn't do squat for me but the XL is a time relesed type and for some reason that seems to be the key for me. good luck and don't be afraid to reach out for help........(easy to say.......took me a LONG time to do it too)but it's easier once you do..... take care...JohnD

joeboot
New Member


Date Joined Dec 2004
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 12/8/2004 10:43 AM (GMT -7)   
You hate your job, your husband is unemployed and you have a new-born, enough said right there, of course you're hurting! That is enough to break anyone's spirit temporarily, the important thing to remember is your situation is temporary, these things will change, maybe not soon enough for what you're feeling but take some comfort in knowing it will change and get better. You've been through hellish situations before I'm sure, and they passed and it's good and it's bad, and up and down, this is life, except it, pay attention to 3 most important things in your life(I'm not talking about baby, husband, job tho they are extremely important)
fuel- mind/body/soul,
(self helpbooks/freshfruits and veggies/pray & or meditate)
consciousness- excersize/work(you are needed),
subconscious- rest(cat naps do wonders)/sleep(no tv on).
Now is most important you take care of yourself even and especially if you don't want to. If you aren't on meds STAY off of them, exaust every natural remedy before you even consider living your life on a script. Not to lay a guilt trip on script junkies everywhere or the drug pushing docs that carelessly over-medicate anyone with health care or cash, but drugs aren't always the answer and in your case the evidence of why you are feeling overwhelmed is odvious, don't seek comfort from a little magic pill, you are a regimented person, utilize the training you've received to keep yourself in line. And so this too shall pass. Talking about what you are feeling, releasing this inner beast on your back is a major step. See, hear, smell, taste, touch the things in life that you enjoy most, treat yourself to what you love, especially now. Hit a spa, pamper yourself from head to toe, you earned and deserve it, you NEED it. Remember to reward yourself sometimes, it is not only good it is Very good. I hope this hard spell passes for you quickly, you are surrounded by love and you are healing as we speak. God bless you and yours. Peace


 

Post Edited (joeboot) : 12/8/2004 10:51:49 AM (GMT-7)

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