just haven't been myself lately.

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peacenlove
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 4/3/2010 7:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone,

Well, I'm new here and I don't really know what to say. I'm just really lonely right now and wanted someone to talk to, so here I am. Spring time seems to be an extra hard time for me, and it's made more difficult because it's so nice out and everyone seems to enjoy life, but I feel like something is missing. Because it is. When I was 14, my grandfather passed away. It was the first time I lost a loved one who I was so close to, and it broke me. I was so sad because we had such a special connection and I still really wish he was around for me to talk to while I'm in college. There are so many things I'm learning and I know he would really appreciate it all. I miss him all the time. Then when I was 15, I lost my uncle. He committed suicide. We weren't incredibly close because he lived so far away, and I hadn't seen him in a very long time, and I am so sad because of it. He was such an amazing person, and when I sat down to write my special memory with him to say at his funeral, I couldn't think of anything. So I didn't say anything. I'm still crushed about that. Anyway, then when I was 17, a good friend of mine passed away. She was 18. She was way too young, and she died in a freak accident. She was perfectly healthy, and so kind and generous. She was bound for great things in this world and she was taken way too soon. I miss them all so so much.
All of their birthdays are in spring, her's is coming up (it's on Earth day, so reminiscent of her. She cared so much about this Earth.) I feel like when I get depressed like this, I become a different person. So aloof from the world. I try really hard to hide it and be happy and normal but I just can't. And now I feel like my best friend is avoiding me. Perhaps because I'm acting different. A lot of my friends are distant from me right now, or maybe it's that I'm distant from them. So I'm really lonely, and that's just making me more depressed.

I'm sorry for the rant, I just had to let it out to someone.

worriedgirl
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 1130
   Posted 4/3/2010 11:35 PM (GMT -7)   
i know it is hard when someone passes away but really they are still alive, within you and you should take comfort in that rather than being sad. no one really dies becasue they have loved and because they have loved their memories live on in the hearts of all the people they have touched.
The only person who can make you happy is you. Be your own self and love who you are because each and every one of you are wonderful for who you are
 
"No one really dies because they have loved. Because they love they stay in the hearts of the people they have touched so in that their memory lives on." Ghost whisperer-i know corny but this touched me deep down and i see so much truth in it.


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40574
   Posted 4/4/2010 7:05 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Peace,

And welcome to the forum. I feel worried girl is right, everybody is still with you in a sense. People will come and go in your life. It gets especially hard as you get older because you know more people who die. But that is a part of life, believe that they go to a better place and watch over you.

I hope this helps in some small way. Know that we support you here and are here for you. Take care my friend.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18748
   Posted 4/5/2010 4:03 AM (GMT -7)   
YES TO THAT KAREN!!!!!!!!!!!! ALWAYS WATCHING OVER ME. PEACE, ME ALSO MANY, MANY LOSES. AS I SAY TO THEM. 'ALWAYS WITH ME, ALWAYS WITH YOU' AND ESP TO MY LADY WHO PASSED IN 06. THE SONG BY THE ABOVE NAME IS DEDICATED TO HER. J. SATRIANI.
MAY PEACE BE IN YOUR HEART PEACE. MAY LOVE AND BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES WRAP YOU IN WARMTH.
JAMIE. WITH HEALING COMPASSION, MY DEEPEST CONDOLENCES TO YOU. JAMIE
YESTERDAY IS A BUTTERLY WITHOUT WINGS. (ME)
 
DX, MDD, SEVERE BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER.
 
REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.

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