My name on this forum is loner

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loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/24/2010 11:29 AM (GMT -7)   
Good morning every one.
My name on this forum is loner I chose this name cause it is my way of Life.You know one against this cold cruel world.Sort of ironic though,Im living with my niece and her four boys.Believe this too they But this is the life that anny one of our kids could choose Gare 100% pure boys.

Well the other day one of the boys got into a fight at school for pertecting his mothers name,to me this is very respectful and I told him so. But also explained to him that fighting just because you want to or because you can beat up the next kid is wrong and there is no respect in such a thing.

You see Ive fought most of my life every thing from street fighting to the bar rooms and also some prison gang related fights.Believe me when I say this I dont want no one to have to live the life I have lived.It was such a waste. But I do believe in my heart that if there is some way to keep one child from messing up that we need to tahe the initiative to do so

We teach our kids whats right and wrong?But ther are other things they need to be aware of one thing we live in a society that believes in fairy tails and has no honest to goodness morals any more.Believe this for it is the truth.

Right now the prison system is full and there are still thousands ready to enter for thier first time or returnning. Our society has bred MONSTERS out there that do some of the most God awful things you can imagine. Ive been there and could write a book about the decadence tha would turn your stomaches.Believe me when I say this Some people out there should be killed. Iknow this aint a verry good thing to be writing about But its true and there are many traps out there for the young to fall into.

I honstly cannot understand the nieve people out here that just let ther kids go do what they want to do and expect things to be all right, just the other night we had to call a little girls parents to come get her from the house.She came in at 10 pm. scared to death because some man kept following her in his car. This girl was only 10 years old. We caught the man who was following her called the police and they done nothing. So we out it out all over the neighbour hood what hapenned description of the car who this man was and in this process we also put it out to the people that our house can be a designated safe house for the kids to come to. It works out well too. You woudnt believe the kids that come here now some that run from abbusive parents some just to find something to eat.Actually just the other day I had to physiclly remove a drunk and abbusive person from this property .He came here and hit his 9 yearold sone for leaving home.Im talking about this guy litterally balled his fist up and hit his own sun! I cant tell you what I did to him but he was most effectively removed from this property,his son is still here afraid to go home cause Mom and Dad are addicted to crack cocaine.

Some people tell me Im getting way to involved woth this,but I think theres not enough people willing to get involved and they should.

Please be honest with your selves concernning your children and then let me know how you feel about this.........Loner. [img]/community/emoticons/devil.gif[/img]

Post Edited By Moderator (Admin) : 8/23/2010 4:33:59 PM (GMT-6)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/24/2010 11:42 AM (GMT -7)   
Take him fishing Loner. That is so good for kids, teaches them about nature and gives you two time together to bond. I grew up fishing. My grandfather use to take me and I love it to this day. My fish of choice is bluegill and I like perch too. Always did like the pan fish. But wont turn down walleye.

Best wishes to you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/25/2010 1:21 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Karen,thanks for the script.I appreciate the effort and the thoughtfulness.I learned along time ago to value others people oppinion as much as I would my own it helps a lot to know how other people response to our impute .Its a learning prosces that can be very valuable in our lives
As for my boys they are all over here layed up in the living room playing video games. So right now I have a pretty active house.I would actually love to take these boys fishing and camping for a week end It would do all of us some good.We are trying to plan out a summer camping trip for a week down at Rodmans Dam.Its a cool place that has a nice primitave camp sight by the water its cheep and a lot of fun for the boys.
Right now we are in the process of teaching the some basic living skills,like cooking and washing their own laundry.How we do this is the same as chores but the weekends around here is fend for your self,so the boys are responsible for lunch and supper. We let them cook what ever they want within reason.This is real interesting too,on one week end we ate home made pizza from the oldest boy,the youngest made crunchy oat meal for us one time he melted chocolate chips in the oat meal and put corn flakes in it to make it crunchy.Well I think you get the idea.
Right now thing are good and peaceful so God bless
Loner

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/25/2010 3:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Sounds cozy for you and the boys. How many kids do you have? I like the idea of teaching responsibility to them. That is good. It is nice to hear that this is going on.

Camping and fishing sounds like fun. Nothing better that fresh fried fish by the lake. lol... The good old days. I haven't been fishing in years. But hope to go this summer.

I hope that you are having a good day today. Sounds like you are and that is wonderful.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/27/2010 8:46 AM (GMT -7)   
Good morning and thank you all for the kind words and response to my script,Sometimes the encourage ment goes a long way.
Things with the boys are good and they actually help me more than I do them. They are a sorce of real motivation in my life right now.I really enjoy watching them just being theyre selves and learn more from them every day.
So god bless,,I have got to get back to work right now Loner

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/27/2010 9:09 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Loner,

I read on your other post and am proud of what you accomplished by getting those toxic people out of your home. I am so proud of you for that.

I am glad that you are keeping busy and enjoying your children. That is wonderful in itself. Keep up the good work.

Have a great day.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/27/2010 9:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey Karen,
Thank you very much, it was actualy pretty hard for me to do what I did but they forced my hand and Im really not the one for that to be done to.I did the best I knew how to do,hated like hell to involve the police in the matter cause one thing I dont believe in is involving the police in my personal affairs.I dont like cops and I will never trust them.But this is neither here nor there,pretty much a closed subject now.
I started A.A. tonight,went and visited my old group and sort of I dont know its hard to explain.
To tell you the truth about all of this Ive been feeling another bout of depression coming on and Im just trying to keep occupied through it so it dont become larger than what Im facing right now in my life.Im not suicidal or any thing but this can lead me into a relpse if Im not careful.
I dont take no medications or any thing like that cause I found if I can catch the symptins early on in my 3stages of depression than I can usually weather it out pretty good.It usually takes me about three days to make it through and then I do my little manic stage and then battle my compulsions.Like I said 3 stages.But either way it dont really matter all that much its the out come that counts.
Loner

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/28/2010 7:17 AM (GMT -7)   
It sounds like you have got a grip on your depression and know how to handle it. That is a good thing. I have to take meds for the rest of my life. This is due to my mother drinking and taking pills when she carried me. I guess that is what happens to the baby. But I have my depression in remission for the most part. Yesterday was a little harder for me, which threw me for a loop. But today is much better.

I know what you mean about the cops. But they are there for everybody so it was good that you called them. I don't like them really either. Don't like having them around, but I have had to deal with them too, so don't feel bad about it. You did what you had to do.

Take care, have a great day with your sons.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/28/2010 10:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Karen,
Thanks for the hugs(BIG SMILEY FACE) and your kind words of encouragement.As for my boys they are actually my nephews I call them my boys because they have become such a big part of my life,and I really like hanging out with them and watching them be boys.I myself have no children of my own,which is a good thing too, at the time in my life when I should have been raisin a family I was really messed up bad on drugs and in and out of jail and prison so I wouldnt have been a good father figure then,and now its to late.So I make it up with my nieces and nephews,And have a wonderful time doing that too.
you know such a big part of my life has been wasted through my addictions and I know I will never get it back,so what I really want to do is to show the boys that drugs and alcohal are not cool but rather a waste of time.If I can keep one child from going through the hell Ive went through than it would be worth the time.One thing I do strongly believe in is that as long as a person has breath in his or her body there is still hope for that person.I believe this and practice this whole heartedly.It helps to keep me straight and focused on my goals and the reality of my life.
One day I would like to meet some one and maybe fall in love ,but right now Im making no plans other than taking care of myself.You know I have never been in love and would like to experience it but now is not the time.
Sorry about that sort of got off track.But as for my depression Ive fought all my life drinking and drugging magnified, didnt know what was wrong until I got sober and it took prison to do that.So there is a silver lining in every cloud after all?Hell of a way to find it but I did.Any ways when I was diagnosed as bi-polar I did a lot of research to learn as much as I could about it.I figured if this is what the major problem was then there was a chance I could finaly get straightened out.I tried meds but they didnt work for me,so I tried learning new life skills and so far its been the only thing that I have found that works and the best part is Im finally getting a handle on who Iam and what I want to be,All its I really want is to become a better person than I was.I want control of my life,and sofar so good.
I still have my good days and my bad days but now in more of a normal range than before.Im more compelled to look at my problems and try to work them out than to get fubar and hope they just go away.
I see life more as a chalenge than an inconvenience,there was a time I just couldnt live with my self but now I know who Iam what Iam But most important Iknow now the person I want to be and who I want to be.Im finally ready to live instead of self destruct.
well Ive got to go thank you again,and try this;wrap your arms around yourself,say Loner and this will be me sending you a hug back.
Loner.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/28/2010 11:57 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Loner,

And thank you for the virtual hug. It helps. I am glad to see your way of thinking. I am glad that you are on the road to recovery. I know that it isn't easy, it isn't easy for any of us, but you are trying to get back into society and that must be an even more challenge. Thinking that life is a challenge is good. My grandmother use to say, "it's not the problem, but how you deal with it". I didn't understand that for years, but I do now. A person can get upset and worry all day. But it doesn't have to be that way. I find that the easiest way for me is to take life one day at a time. Face problems when they arise. I use to get stressed out about life and all the problems, but have learned to cope with them. Coping with everyday life was a challenge too. Now it is easier. I let a lot of things roll off my back that would ordinarily bother me. I am glad for that. I wasted a lot of my life worrying about things that I had no control over. I have learned to let go. Live and let live I guess.

I am really happy for you. Have you found any jobs that you might want to work yet? What kind of a job would you be looking for? I have been on a leave of absence from my job, but don't know if I will be going back. My income hurts us more than helps us in the long run. Unless I could work full time, and I am not able to. So I guess I will be unemployeed this summer. but the job that I had was the first job in seven years and that was a huge milestone for me. I have been suffering with fibromyalgia and depression for years. So it was nice to know that I could work part time anyway. And succeed. So I am proud of that.

Well, I have been rattling. I will end here. Hopeing that you are enjoying your day. Hope to hear from you soon. I am glad that you found this site.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/29/2010 5:21 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Karen.
I just read your post aint got much time today to much ,today I have to go take my TABE TEST IM fixing to go back to school .Im a mechamic by trade cant find a decent job any where so Im on my way to further my education,Im taking a two year course in the technical field and diagnostics.
well I got to go Iwill tell you more about it later......Loner.

MMMNAVY
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted 4/29/2010 5:28 AM (GMT -7)   
Good Luck Loner!
Forum Co-moderator - Crohn's Disease/Thyroid Disorders:_All comments have the caveat contact your local health care provider.

I will find a way or make one. –Phillip Sidney 1554-1586

All that I am and all that I shall ever be, I owe to my Angel Mother.

The Bucket List- Have you found joy in your life?  Has your life brought joy to others?

Make sure your suffering has meaning…


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/29/2010 5:47 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Navy You guys are the best.....Loner

THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18761
   Posted 4/29/2010 6:12 AM (GMT -7)   
all the best from me as well. with compassion, jamie.
YESTERDAY IS A BUTTERLY WITHOUT WINGS. (ME)
 
DX, MDD, SEVERE BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER.
 
REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/29/2010 7:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Good luck Loner,

We all will be thinking of you. Let us know how things go. Furthering your education is a good thing to do.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 4/29/2010 9:51 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey every one dont have much time so Im gonna make this a quicky, Im hoping all of you read this script cause I want to thank you all for yopur support I was a little nervous about going to the school and taking the TABE TEST but now Im done and things turned out pretty good. Right now Im at the library some peace and quiet.The last time I was hear I fell asleep while reading the news paper,first real embarassing moment.Actually the girls who work here said I looked so peaceful that they didnt want to wake me up.Here I go again getting off track.
I was on my way home to take a nap and decided to thank you all for the good words having some support is better than taking things on by yourself.Thanks.
Maybe one day wecould all get to gether and have a bbq.(smiley face)......................
Im sitting by a girl right now that puts me in mind of my ex-wife.But she is cuter.She helped me a little in getting started Im not to familiar with these library computers so she helps me get on line.thank god for the small stuff wll Im rambling so Id better go ....Loner.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/29/2010 12:26 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey Loner,

I am glad that everything went well. I was just watching a base ball game, we won, I think. I stepped away to come on the computer.

Just walked my dogs to get them and myself some exercise. Now I am tired. But woke up that way, again...

I hope that you are having a good day.

Take care,

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18761
   Posted 4/30/2010 1:51 AM (GMT -7)   
good for you loner. jamie.
 
ps karen. hoping the fatique improves. with kindness, jamie
YESTERDAY IS A BUTTERLY WITHOUT WINGS. (ME)
 
DX, MDD, SEVERE BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER.
 
REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 4/30/2010 5:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Me too Jamie,

I am tired of being tired. lol...

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


MMMNAVY
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted 4/30/2010 11:46 AM (GMT -7)   
Just checking in! Hoping life is good today.
Forum Co-moderator - Crohn's Disease/Thyroid Disorders:_All comments have the caveat contact your local health care provider.

I will find a way or make one. –Phillip Sidney 1554-1586

All that I am and all that I shall ever be, I owe to my Angel Mother.

The Bucket List- Have you found joy in your life?  Has your life brought joy to others?

Make sure your suffering has meaning…


Joie1
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 376
   Posted 5/1/2010 12:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Glad to know things are going well for you Loner. Just use distraction as well as you can. And consider all the wonderful things you have in your life starting with those boys and your niece and being strong enough to stop an abuser. Remind yourself often that you are a good man. I tell my cousin that a lot right now. He's in NA and I can tell that he sometimes wants to stumble so I remind him of his daughter and what kind of life he wants her to see him lead. So I'll say the same to you. The best way to teach a kid good morals is to use good morals in your own life. Just as you did with the boyo who fought to protect his mother's name. That's an honestly good moral. Never letting anyone disrespect your family and home. Having the respect to clean up the house and choosing what food to feed your family. All great lessons in living a positive life, Loner. Keep it up.
27/f
Allergies and Asthma my whole life: OTC Wal-Zyr D 12-hour
Depression after surgeries and illness of 2003.
Crohns Dx'd: February 2008: Pentasa
Fibromyalgia Dx'd: July 21, 2009: Lyrica, Cymbalta, Hydrocodone, Prenatal Vitamin


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18761
   Posted 5/1/2010 1:19 AM (GMT -7)   
me too karen!!!! hey, remember that you are a inspirational idea person. with kindness, jamie. one day at time my friend.
YESTERDAY IS A BUTTERLY WITHOUT WINGS. (ME)
 
DX, MDD, SEVERE BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER.
 
REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.


loner
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 5/1/2010 8:48 AM (GMT -7)   
  To Navy, Jammie,Karen;
  I went to gainsville yesterday to look for work things are hard all over but I was able to make a littlie bit of money so Im taking the boys to the lake today.Im gonna let them spend the day fishing swimming or what ever they want. Please pray for me its going to be a long day but every one is excited and the boys need this little break from town and theyre video games.
 GOD I LOVE BEING FREE.....Loner.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40590
   Posted 5/1/2010 10:08 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Loner,

I am so happy for you. This is great. I hope that you and the boys have a wonderful time.
 
Spending time with the ones that you care about is so important.  Especially for the boys.  It brings fond memories.  The fishing is good.  Teaches them things.  I am happy that you are there for them.

Hugs, Karen


  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Post Edited (getting by) : 5/1/2010 9:45:29 PM (GMT-6)


MMMNAVY
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted 5/2/2010 9:45 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Loner,
Hope you had a good day by the lake.
Take it easy,
Navy
Forum Co-moderator - Crohn's Disease/Thyroid Disorders:_All comments have the caveat contact your local health care provider.

I will find a way or make one. –Phillip Sidney 1554-1586

All that I am and all that I shall ever be, I owe to my Angel Mother.

The Bucket List- Have you found joy in your life?  Has your life brought joy to others?

Make sure your suffering has meaning…

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