This might be the last post I put on this forum for a while.. Not because I'm going to do something stupid or anything, but because as much as I love you all, even typing/reading has begun to be a hassle.
After quitting therapy 4 or 5 weeks ago, and hoping to quit meds, I've pretty much decided to team up with my depression, because it's really all I'll ever know. Some people get infected by depression after an earlier, happier period, and they don't feel normal so they know that they have depression. Not the case with me. I was born depressed, and I've come to face the fact that I am, and always will be, depressed. Maybe it's just my personality, since I've never known anything different. No amount of drugs (or supplements.. bluck) are going to be able to fix my depression though, and that's for sure. Even if I am lacking chemicals in my brain, no matter what drug I'm on, I'm never going to happy with the results (even if the results, in fact, cause some form of happiness). Because in all honesty, I feel brainwashed on drugs, and that feeling is worse than being depressed.
So for now I just wanted to say thanks to you all for the support. From the first moment I came on this forum it helped me, and continues to help me. And if I can find the energy to keep reading the posts of others, even if I don't respond, know that I am behind each and every one of you, through even the darkest times. And thanks, for everything. I hope to feel a little better if I make it to college late August, so maybe I'll talk to y'all then.