I need advice from someone who understands

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BlackRose
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2010
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 7/19/2010 4:06 PM (GMT -7)   
I've been upset a lot lately. I just moved across the country and have been married for a year to someone in the military. He has been gone a lot so I've been extremely lonely since I don't know anyone in the new town I'm in. While there I saw my doctor and she prescribed me Wellbutrin. I've been taking it steadily for about a month now.

After getting my prescription I decided I needed to come back to the town I grew up in and since I've been here I've been acting crazy. I drank with old friends on my 21st birthday and got extremely drunk, made an ass of myself, and was so flirtatious with everyone I talked to. It has been bothering me the past few days. My friend suggested that I go to counseling because whenever I drink I get flirty with anyone. She thinks I have an underlying problem, such as I don't get enough attention with my husband because he's always gone and out of contact. I just saw it as normal that people get out of hand on their 21st and it was kind of a socially expected thing. Ever since her and I have been talking though, I feel really guilty and I've been in and out of crying the past few days. I just want to go home and try to feel better with the new life I have waiting for me. My husband gets back soon and we agreed to spend more time together and go out and do more things, but I feel like I have to wait for him to get back to feel better because I can't think of anything to do to help myself.

The Wellbutrin isn't really working anymore and I feel worse than I did before I was on it. I have had an alcohol problem since I was 18... So I wonder if there is something worse going on with me and I need advice on how to feel better about my past and how to start moving forward and making the right decisions. Am I the only one out there that acts like this and does a lot of things they regret? I'm absolutely embarrassed and I need help. I have to wait to see a counselor until I return home in a few days, so I would like someone who reads this to help me. I need to talk to someone who has felt this way too.

Post Edited (BlackRose) : 7/19/2010 8:29:17 PM (GMT-6)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40573
   Posted 7/19/2010 7:07 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Blackrose,
 
Welcome to the HealingWell Depression forum.  I am truly glad that you have joined us.  Nothing apparently happened beyond the flirting right?  So I would forget about it and take this one day at a time.  I would try not to drink though.  Because drinking causes depression and that could be why the welbutrin is not working well.  It has to fight a lot in order for you to feel good as long as you are drinking regularly.  You will be depressed as long as you continue to drink.  We also lose our inhibitions when we get drunk.  So we do things that we wouldn't ordinarily do when we are sober. 
 
So until you see your counselor, I would try to take it one step at a time.  Try not to worry about your 21st birthday and wait for your man to come home.  Find things to do to keep yourself busy.  Maybe you could donate some time by volunteering somewhere where help is needed.  That would make you feel good. 
 
Keep posting, I am sure that others will have some ideas for you. 
 
And we are not allowed to discuss self harm.   I thought that I would mention that as you started to in your post. Thanks in advance for understanding.
 
Hugs, Karen 
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


BlackRose
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2010
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 7/19/2010 7:37 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Karen,

I didn't realize we couldn't write about that, but I edited it out, so thank you for making me aware.

Nothing developed more than flirting, but I am still uncomfortable with myself and pretty disappointed. I suppose I need to move on and I will eventually bring myself to get over it. It's just one of those things that eats at me because it's so bothering. The past few weeks I have been getting a lot better about drinking in moderation and not drinking until the weekend. I'll take your advice on quitting drinking. I have noticed ever since I started taking WB that I feel really depressed the next two days. That may be what is at play right now, but I am in one of those moods where I just want someone to talk to who is not going to judge me. That's how I found this website.

I'm brainstorming ways to keep busy now and I think I can handle that until I get home and my husband does as well. Thank you for your support and views.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40573
   Posted 7/20/2010 7:07 AM (GMT -7)   
I think with the kind of motivation that you have, you will be able to find something to occupy your time until your husband comes home.  You seem like the type of person who cares and tries.  That is a good quality.  I hope that you can put past you what you did on your 21st birthday, it was only flirting so that isn't that bad.  And I hope that you are able to move beyond that and focus on your hubby coming home. 
 
Best wishes to you my friend.  Continue to post as you need to.  We all do understand how depression can put you into that black hole and I don't want to see you go there.  You are a good person, remember that.
 
Like I said, keep posting, that can even kill some time for you. 
 
Take care,
 
Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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