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Having2LeftFeet
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 7/23/2005 7:16 AM (GMT -7)   
tongue  Yes, I left for a while. I can't remember the last time I was this low. I have cried every day and Friday when I went to the Psych I cried the entire time I was there. I had an 3 hour evaluation to see exactly what and how they will broach the matter of my spine. Whether it be invasive or what. After all that, they told me I am not a cadidate for the workout program and that my back was too far gone. Cried all the way home. At one point, my husband said, "This s*** is getting old"! I felt really bad, like I was a burden. He has never said that to me and I know he didn't mean it but it still hurts. We didn't ask to be sick. It just so happens that we are.
 
Now I will wait for their assesment and take it from there. What are the choices. Well, I can have invasive surgery or be on drugs all my life. I don't want either, but then again, we didn't ask for this did we. Hugs to all.
 
Love, "Lefty" Sue 
There is no such word as can't. Can't simply means wouln't. Grab as much as life as you can. Future is a long way away for those who don't believe. Don't build a foundation of life on sand. It will take it away with the tide. Love a little more, be unkind a lot less.


AlwaysRosie
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 8616
   Posted 7/23/2005 10:36 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Sue,

Feeling for you sis!! Hubby didn't mean that the way you took it. He meant that he is hurting for you for all the bad stuff that happens to you. Guys can't handle it if they can't fix it and he needs a target for his anger. I am sure he was NOT talking about you being a burden!!

It is very hard for our hubbies to sit and watch a disease take away our energy and leave us with pain. I hope you two can come up with a decision that is best for you.

Sorry you have such a limited choice here . . . that really stinks.

Keep us posted sis.

Hugs, prayers and blessings!
In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie          "We can't control the waves, but we can learn to surf!"
Psalms 139
UCTD (Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease), Hashimoto's, Plantar Fasciitis, Inflamatory Arthritis, High BP, GI Inflamation, Diverticuloses
Plaquenil, Methotrexate, Metanx, Synthroid, RX Motrin, Lexapro, Amitriptelyne, Salagen, Lotrel


dbab
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 4151
   Posted 7/23/2005 12:00 PM (GMT -7)   
Sue,
I agree with Rosie. My husband is the same way. He gets so frustrated because he can't do anything for me to make me feel better. He takes it out on me by saying similar things but really doesn't mean to. He's told me sorry on numerous occasions about what he says and that he just hates to see me this way. Have you two tried counseling together. It might help both of you on how to cope with everything. I'm praying for you Sue.
Take Care
Des (dbab)
IBS, Diverticulosis, GERD, Disc Degeneration
"If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it" - Mary Engelbreit
 
 
 


straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13451
   Posted 7/23/2005 2:14 PM (GMT -7)   
Susie,

Everyone is right, my illness' and condition has put our life at a complete stand still the last 3 yrs. My husband does not know how to react to this. I was always the healthy one doing everything and he was the sickly one. Now, I am the sickly one and he cannot handle it or the attention my family gives me. My brother tells me he thinks my hubby is jealous because he is no longer in the limelight so to speak.


AlwaysRosie
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 8616
   Posted 7/23/2005 7:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Des, Sue, and StrayDog,

I think tha the caretaker role is, at times, more difficult than the sick person's role. Having done duty on both ends, I am happier being the sick person. When someone I love is sick, I just worry to death and I'm trying to anticipate their needs and help them before they have to ask for help. I think sometimes the caretaker is taken for granted by people outside the family. Actually, when people are ill for a while I send the get well card to the sick person and an encouragement card to the caretaker!! Kind of a thanks for all you are doing card.

I do hate to ask for help or watch hubby do, do, doing, when I have to rest quite a bit. Honestly, we should probably give these guys a medal!!

Blessings!
In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie          "We can't control the waves, but we can learn to surf!"
Psalms 139
UCTD (Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease), Hashimoto's, Plantar Fasciitis, Inflamatory Arthritis, High BP, GI Inflamation, Diverticuloses
Plaquenil, Methotrexate, Metanx, Synthroid, RX Motrin, Lexapro, Amitriptelyne, Salagen, Lotrel


Having2LeftFeet
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 7/26/2005 8:28 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi, family,
Thanks for the encouragement. I am trying and will give update in a new thread. I love you all!
 
Sue
There is no such word as can't. Can't simply means wouln't. Grab as much as life as you can. Future is a long way away for those who don't believe. Don't build a foundation of life on sand. It will take it away with the tide. Love a little more, be unkind a lot less.

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