"Today a friend of mine made me do all his work and after he got a good grade he yelled at me for no reason and left and while he was leaving he gave me back my work and said you can have it now."
You skipped something. You're the one who has this wonderful ability to do this good work or project. They're the ones so stupid can't even tie their shoes.
But you've elevated them above you. Whoa! You're above them.
You skipped over a positive trait of yours to get to a negative. And that is, you're very smart. See, you're looking for the negative.
Why don't we just stop at the part where you're smart. What would you like to do with your academic skills?
"I'm really upset that I get used all the time. I mean, people use me for a lot of things."
Again you may have a negative impression of yourself.
Were you raised in a negative household?
I had a negative self-image, and was raised in a negative household, so it's no mystery where it came from.
I probably have the same personality was you do, not real forceful, not real dynamic, wanting and willing to help people. As you and I know, deadly combination.
But for one thing, we can look at those qualities
1. Not real forceful, or sensitive. Sensitivity is not a weakness but a strength. Sensitive people are better at helping others, and can help themselves with that same trait. You don't usually go to a forceful person for help.
2. "not real dynamic" People who are not real dynamic are more down to earth, without a lot of theatrics. Such down to earth people are more likely to help and probably more sought after by those who have problems.
3. "wanting and willing to help people" That's a strength, not a weakness. It can be a weakness, with people like you and me, but it can also be looked at as a strength.
I try to help people with my advanced age and experiences. I sometimes get ripped off. Some of the people I try to help, try to destroy me. I know. I know the feeling. You and I probably know some of the same people.
But you have to try to plow through that to get to the positive. We have to remember, we're not the jerk, they are.
I got ripped off by somebody, and almost a year later, out of loneliness, I called them back. They were shocked, they thought I was coming after them. I wasn't, I just wanted to talk.
It turned out they were in trouble, I helped them (same old me), and we became good friends. For one thing, I stayed positive, positive that I wanted to help them, positive that they could get through some of their difficulties.
It was also like a big brother, little sister situation. I got an ego boast from helping, they got helped, it worked out. If I had stayed all mad because she had ripped me off, I wouldn't have had that experience, and she wouldn't have gotten help.
I also don't try to help some crook who is stronger than I am. She was my little sister, as you noticed. A bigger sister who dominates me, I stay away from.
A guy up the street ripped me off for 4 years. But he was basically a nice guy, he just got paid off to give me a hard time. And he and I became friends, and he and I team up sometimes to help other people. I know, it's a strange relationship. But if we hadn't gotten back together as friends, we couldn't help others.
One reason was because he was basically a nice guy, and two he now could help me. Am I ripping him off or did he rip me off?
So be big enough to look over some transgressions, but be smart enough to stay away from some people.
I was the same way when I was your age. A lackey. Help someone weaker than you are. Volunteer in a hospital. Walk dogs at a dog pound. Use you strength. Use your willingness to help.
You and I are in a better position to help people because we're sensitive, and we've been through such rough stuff ourselves.
You're really a good person, you just don't know it.
You say, "I don't think I'll ever get a friend who'll treat me like the way I deserve to be treated or even a guy who'd love me selflessly."
You can start this process off b y being good to yourself. And not by looking for someone who will be good to you, but by looking for someone that you can help, again, like at a hospital as a volunteer.
Post Edited (Tim Tam) : 5/16/2017 11:41:20 AM (GMT-6)