God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can;and wisdom to know the difference.
Hi james, I was wondering if your wife normally communicates with you about her feelings honestly or to a level that you believe to be honest? I dont mean to be nosey here, but I know in my marriage I had built up a lot of anger and hostility toward my husband and got to the point where I wouldnt even talk to him about my thoughts and feelings anymore. We pretty much just co-existed together in our house until I couldnt take it and had to move out. I was pretty depressed at the time and on an antidepressant which wasnt helping much. If I had been willing to go to a marriage counselor at the time it most likely could of saved our marriage but I refused. I just felt to overwhelmed. Its hard to explain.
It just doesnt seem right that she would say something hurtful to you on paper in a fit of anger or really depressed state then turn around and almost say never mind I didnt mean it. Or pretend it didnt happen and nothings wrong.
Years ago, I got therapy and it helped. From what you say, I think that would be a good alternative. My only concern would be that there are good therapists and bad therapists. I was lucky (I got the name from the phone book).
For me, trying to design a better future helps. I know what you're saying about one day at a time. I like to have something to work towards. That just me.
Best of luck.
she actually went to a pschologist had some cognetive counselling ,she made an appointment with family doc and is gonna get her to refer her to a psychiatrist for proper diagnosis and meds..things are looking up I hope !!!