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wisdom54
New Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 6/28/2006 8:45 PM (GMT -7)   
I am going through a melt down.  I have not been sleeping well, this has been going on for weeks.  My body has now started to break down.  I have spent the day shaking and my arms and hands have been tingling.  I don't trust my thoughts and I know my memory has lost itself.  Mentally I am at the end of my rope.  To top it off my husband and I are not speaking.  At this point I don't see much left to hang on to.  Death maynot be the answer but it is looking mighty inviting.  Does anyone really care, I think not.  My meds are not working the way they should and quite frankly, I don't feel like my doc cares anymore.
Too much to do, to much stress and a brain that refuses to work. mad

janetlee
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 6/28/2006 10:59 PM (GMT -7)   
Wisdom,
I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time! I've been there! But it will get better! If you feel that your doctor isn't helpful, go to a different one! And if you're having suicidal thoughts, call a crisi number ASAP! They can help you. If I got down that bad feeling, I'd call! I did once actually. Although I wouldn't want to go into a hospital, I would if it meant my life. They're there to help you get your meds adjusted and give some guidance. You are NOT alone and believe me when I say that people DO care! I do and many others do as well! Hang in there and keep posting!
janet
I was okay until that flock of bird dogs flew over...


els
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4031
   Posted 6/29/2006 3:49 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi wisdom54,  When you have depression it is so important to try to get enough sleep or rest and eat properly.  If your sleep patterns have been disturbed for several weeks for whatever the reason then it is going to cause an increase in symptoms.  Stress of any kind can cause sleep disturbances, and if it goes on for an extended period of time you should report it to your physician.  You said that your already taking meds and dont feel they are working how they should?  Depending on how long you have been on them, so meds start to lose their effect the longer that you take them.  I had this problem with Zoloft and ended up being extremely depressed and having thoughts of self harm before I even went to get them switched.  As Janet said you always do have the option of switching doctors if you dont feel that yours is being receptive to your plan of care.  But either way you need to be proactive and get seen as soon as possible.  I am going to post some links from our Web Site on suicide resources just in case you feel that you may need them, if you do please do use them.  We are always here so please feel free to continue to post, this is a wonderful place for support.  Take care

http://suicidehotlines.com/

http://suicide.com/suicidecrisiscenter/

http://suicidal.com/depressionandsuicide/


Elisha

http://www.healingwell.com/donate


 


wisdom54
New Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 6/29/2006 5:03 AM (GMT -7)   
I have been on welbutrin for the past ten years. We have added celexa to the mix now. I have taken ambien for sleep, but right now it's not working as well. I am fighting a sinus problem for the past three months that has coontributed to my not being able to sleep. The meds I have taken for this has added to the depression. I have switched around meds for that also. I have nothing left physically or mentally to fight this. As far as the crisis lines, I have called in the past and ended up more frustrated after and ended up cutting. I have been with my docotr for over ten years and it is more than likely that it's me that feels rejected and not anything he has really done. I am constantly thinking that nobody really cares and that my life is worth nothing. Lies that are more believeable than the truth. I just can't turn off the thoughts.

bluemeanies
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2004
Total Posts : 1372
   Posted 6/29/2006 9:37 AM (GMT -7)   
I am taking Celexa in the morning and Remeron at night and it has really helped me with sleep. I hope you find some relief soon.

wisdom54
New Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 6/29/2006 1:21 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks for the concern and the posts.  I guess I've reached an impass with myself.  As the day progresses I sem to be sinking lower.  Self-harm, yes it's always in my thoughts.  Will I, at the moment I say no, but I feel like I'm losing touch with what little of my sanity I have  left.  SHould I call a help line, yes but I won't, bad experience twice.  Need to talk, yes but don't have anyone to turn to.

shell67
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 1268
   Posted 6/29/2006 3:30 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi wisdom, Im sorry you are having such a hard time, my best friend is going through something like this, it takes its toll. I have had to talk to her about it and try to make her look at the finer side of life,.....but if you need someone to talk to, id be happy to listen, there are people that care, i have met more on this site than in real life. I will put my email addy up just in case you decide to talk, you can look at my profile to get it, but i wont promise how long i will leave it up ;) i wish you the best, ive had many times i wanted to give up, but im so glad i didnt. Life goes on, and it can get better. hugs,
shell
" Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point, then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except what you do now, in this instant of time. From this moment onward you can be an entirely different person, filled with love and understanding, ready with an outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every thought and deed."
Eileen Caddy


wisdom54
New Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 6/29/2006 4:10 PM (GMT -7)   

Thanks for the post.  I do need to talk but I can't right now.  It's hard for to write anything.  I am in such turmoil I don't think I would make much sense.  Besides I can't see through the tears very well.


hope3
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 216
   Posted 6/30/2006 5:37 AM (GMT -7)   
Wisdom, I'm so sorry you are going through such a hard time. I have been down that road myself and it is the most difficult thing to pull yourself out of. But it can be done, go to a good sychiatrist and get the proper meds you need that will help you. Also counseling can help. I know you are probably at a point where you don't feel up to doing anything to help yourself and I can understand that. But life is worth living and what you are going through will not last forever if you get the help you so desperately need. You have people here that care about you and will help you in anyway we can. When your ready to talk there will be someone here to listen. You are not alone. I hope you feel better about everything in your life real soon. Hang in there, and don't give up. You will be in my Prayers. ((HUGS))

Wanda
 

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