Hi Rosie, Welcome to healing well forum. We are happy to have you. I am sorry about what you’re going though; it sounds as if you have been thrown for quite a loop for sure. And also your boyfriend. I would have to agree with atedogs here on how he is interpreting what the psychiatrist is saying, if he isn’t stable at this point in time he could be twisting her words to meet his own needs right now, such as needed space in the relationship. I don’t know him and don’t want to make it out to be like he would do so intentally, however, you if your not going to the appointments with him you don’t know of what is being said there. Only what he is relaying to you. Bipolar Disorder is a very serious illness that can come on suddenly even though the person may have been showing signs or indicators for many years. The good thing is that it is treatable with the proper medications. I can understand that it is going to be very difficult for you to follow his wishes for a while and see where this goes but hopefully in the mean time he will recover a bit with the help of therapy and his medication regime.
I think I know of what posts ate is referring to in hers...I found several so you can go though these and read though if you like
Post Edited (els) : 7/22/2006 5:56:57 AM (GMT-6)
Hi again --
Last night my ex came over after a long phone call. Again, he was calm and "like himself". He said that he'd discovered something wonderful recently: that he's "not mad"! That made me chuckle and I told him I'd known that all along. We had fun playing CDs in the kitchen while cooking, and we had a bit of a dance too (Chuckle will particularly appreciate that -- see Chux, told you I'd be practising! ).
The bolt out of the blue was when he started asking me where I'd most want to live in Hampshire (where we both work); I named a couple of places and let it pass with no questions as to why he was asking. A little while later he asked if I wanted to live with him again -- fresh start in a new place (neither of us is very fond of where I'm renting now!) -- when his current lease is up (2 months) -- a bit of a leap from keeping things "relaxed", eh?! Anyway, I said yes, but we both agreed that it was good to have the time in between to take stock, see how things go, and that we could always take a bit of extra time after the 2 months if we needed it. (This morning he admitted he'd had one dark moment yesterday evening when he felt he was "dangerous" again, and he wants to make sure that's gone before any move in.)
Well, he stayed over (first time since he moved out -- as I said, before even eating together would have flipped him out). Today he's gone to see friends, but he even asked them to pick him up from mine, so we're definitely moving away from the "secret meetings" territory that I was worried about for the first couple of months of this, and he's actively showing that I'm in his life still. It was so good to see his friends again: I always got on great with them and it's been very weird being out of all of that for the last few months.
Tomorrow I'm seeing some of my own friends for the day and am really looking forward to it. I was even a bit concerned that he would suggest I came with him to his friends' and was pleased to have alternative plans just in case. I love spending time with him, of course, but I think it's sensible not to run headlong into long stretches together, just while he gets accustomed to things and comfortable again. And I think I probably need a bit of the same. -- For all I can say that things were so much like normal again, they're not 100% so because I still monitor things and I am aware that there are times when there is a little "eggshell" about. And of course the last few months have been a rollercoaster, and there's likely to be more of that to come: a dose of uncomplicated fun with my mates is a good way for me to keep grounded. (The more I think about them, the more Wmnak's words to me in the bipolar forum ring true.)
I expect things will level off a bit now that we both feel more secure (questions asked and answered) about the possibilities for us in the future. I hope I'm right: I'd be worried at this stage if things moved too fast, as I'd suspect a link with mania. So far I don't think so, but I promise to be wary.
Sorry for yet another long "update": as usual, it's really helped just to write this all out (taking stock!).
All best, as ever,Rosie x
Post Edited (CounterClockwise) : 8/8/2006 8:40:48 AM (GMT-6)