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New Member

Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 8/31/2006 10:16 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi there,
Not sure if this is just me, but before I go into a depression the first sign I get is that I imagine cutting myself.  I sometimes feel like I am doing it to myself but most of the time it is just being done to me and Im not aware of who is doing it. I cant seem to stop these thoughts, they just come and they disturb me so much...theyre also not the type of thing I can discuss with friends.  I dont self mutilate and so i dont know where they come from or how to deal with them. Before I go into a depression they usually start and then as I get beter they just dissapear one day. I dont do anything, they just come and go and I dont seem to have any control over them.
If anybody has experienced anything like this, please let me know, especially if you have found a way of preventing the thoughts or dealing with them when they arrive. I dont know of anybody else who gets these feelings and realy feel alone when I deal with them because I cant talk about them and dont think anybody will understand.
Blue, I am sorry but I have had to edit your post due to forum rule #1 no discussion of self-injury. Your post was very graphic, please do keep in mind that teens and sometimes children post here and we dont want something we post to influence them in anyway.  Thank you ~ Elisha

Post Edited By Moderator (els) : 9/1/2006 5:36:00 AM (GMT-6)

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 470
   Posted 8/31/2006 11:31 AM (GMT -6)   
I think we all have our own triggers and warning signs.  I think it is amazing that you are able to "see" when a depression is coming on.  Take those visions as a sign to get help, it can be a very powerful tool to proactively get help and ward off the attack.  It puts you in  control.

Walk in harmony

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2004
Total Posts : 110
   Posted 8/31/2006 11:38 PM (GMT -6)   
I do cut and see that type of thing when I am getting depressed or am depressed. I'm not sure why you are seeing it, unless it's like cutting in your head and it's enough for you to either reduce the emotional pain your feeling or stop the numbness. I don't really know but that's basically why I cut so maybe you do it without actually doing it...

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1529
   Posted 9/1/2006 6:24 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Blue,

No, you're not alone in this -- but it is something you should probably talk to a therapist about. Cutting is a way of suppressing other pain (emotional) and it would really help you to work out what the root of this is and start to have help dealing with it. I haven't cut myself, but I was anorexic and then bulimic for years and I know that was my suppression tactic. When I sorted out some issues and got help from CBT to deal with everyday responses I was able to pull out of my own self-harming.

Take care,
Rosie x

People are not like fish: they do not work better battered.

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded...


Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

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