Does anyone else just want to move and start over?

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*MovinOn*
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Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 9/11/2006 11:23 PM (GMT -6)   
I just can't help but think that if I left my life as I know it that it would be better elsewhere.  I fresh start and a new beginning.  Actually, my life is pretty good, I've got a great b/f, a great job but for some reason, its not enough and its not what I thought it would be.  I'm not even sure why I'm struggling, I just know that I am and I'm very unhappy with me and what my life has become and I feel the need to escape.   

Stuntrider
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 42
   Posted 9/12/2006 7:06 AM (GMT 0)   
starting over can be a great thing or abad thing... it's great to have a fresh start and new places and things to learn... it's bad when you have no close friends to confide in other than your signifigant other.. i moved from teh east coast to teh midwest 10 years ago to change teh lifestyle i was leading and get on teh right track (i.e... finish school..stop running the streets all hours of the nights from club to club) and it's really helped me achieve a lot.. i now own 2 business's, compete in motorcycle stunt competitions and have a ton of new friends but i will warn you.. the first few months of not having a friend that you feel you can truely trust with your personal feelings/info makes for a wuite depressing time

the winters here are horrible compared to what i'm used to and i get hugely depressed in the cold ( i'm a bit of a sun bunny) but the new life i'm living here sure as hell beats what i was headed for back in teh big city where i grew up

Life never seems to be "what you want it to be" but all you can do is try and realize that there's always tomorrow..what ever you do keep your chin up and go into it with an open mind and enjoy yourself.. i'm still longing to move to TX, but after being up here in NE for 10 years now it's a hard debate to choose to leave all teh close frinds i've gcome to have over the years

MakenziePaige15
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 9/12/2006 3:07 AM (GMT -6)   
wow I feel the same way!

Im Makenzie!
I feel like that alot!
No matter what good things happen....it doesnt keep me happy!
I buy alot of things....use money like its water.
go out and do tons of things with friends but when im alone or home at night....
I feel SO empty! Like the hole will never fill!
I got a new car and 3 new cell phones and keep wanting more to make me happy but like i was once told....Money doesnt solve your problems! and its true but you cant help but hope!

I feel like Im missing half of me and its so annoying!
And theres tons of times I wish i was anywhere else but here and Anyone else!!!!!!
but the reality is.....you have one life and you have to live it to the fullest!
No matter where you go.....you're always gonna find problems! They are everywhere you go! It sucks but its life!

Im here for you just know that!
thers people like you that feel this way....its apart of life i guess!
and honestly......."What doesnt kill you makes you stronger"
and you're a better person for fighting this!

Il be here!
email me if ya want!

Hi Kenzie - please can you put your email address in your control panel if you would like to display it.  That way only members of healing well can access your email. Thanks, Vic

Post Edited By Moderator (Victoria) : 9/12/2006 2:18:53 AM (GMT-6)


32years
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 9/12/2006 4:38 AM (GMT -6)   
Only if we could move and start over...done this...many times....only i take me with me wherever I go! I decided when I moved into this house that I would live my life and find a way to be happy with it...it was advice from my X. The best thing he ever did for me. We are who we are, we can become what ever we decide to become. Life is a process not an event. I didn't read any of this post, this is just my responce to the subject. I could sit here all day but I have got to go get ready for work.

*MovinOn*
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 9/12/2006 7:08 AM (GMT -6)   
It seems like I'm always running from something but I honestly don't know what that is. Maybe its me.

stronglady4me
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 470
   Posted 9/12/2006 10:41 AM (GMT -6)   
Life is hard and the only thing that makes it worthwhile is being there for each other.  You have great things in the life you have, what would be different if you moved?  What would you do differently in a new place that you can't do right where you are? Life isn't what you expected it to be?  What DID you expect it to be?  To me the urge to move is a lot like the urge to sleep our problems away.  It isn't that we don't want what we have, it is that we want what we have to be easier.  Do you have a therapist?  If not, perhaps seeing someone would help you identify what it is that you are unhappy about.
Stronglady4me
Walk in harmony


4eversadness
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 9/13/2006 2:15 AM (GMT -6)   
i feel that way alot there are some days when i just want to pack up and drive away and hope no one finds me. i have a good life too but i am still sad and for some reason that depresses me more. lately though things are just fallin apart. but you always have to think about to of what your leaving behind and if that would be harder than stayin in the same place. i am still trying to decide

Sadsong
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 344
   Posted 9/13/2006 5:00 PM (GMT -6)   

Hi Moving On -

I completely relate to your post.  The last time I counted up the number of times I've moved over the past 10 years it was 17, four different states in one year!  After becoming an expert mover, I've realized a few things. 

Even though I thought that I had a sound explanation for each of the moves (i.e. awful roomate, controlling boss, dead-end job, etc.) the underlying reason kept following me around.  I tend to bottle up what's bothering me until I reach a breaking point.  Once, that breaking point is reached I feel as though nothing can be done to fix the situation, so I just pick up and move.  To me, it's much easier to change my address than to confront people!  Plus, I've gotten so good at being able to pack that I know exactly how to use any space to its fullest potential!  I am only now working on ways to make sure I don't keep falling into this trap. 

A fresh start does sound like an exiciting and promising idea, but I always seem to end up back where I started.  Getting into a situation where I haven't articulated my needs and not getting those needs met.  I mean people can't get read minds, but I seem to expect them too and I can't understand why they just don't treat me like I treat them!  Crazy, eh? 

Anyways, I'm not sure if you're looking for a bit of advice or not, but what I find works best for me is to stop and really appreciate all of the wonderful things I already have.  And I'm talking about comparing my standard of living to the rest of the world.  One of the conversations that has really stuck with me is one that I had with a former roommate of mine a couple of years ago.  We were talking about a trip she had taken to Nepal.  The daily struggle and harsh conditions they live in, and yet they all had smiles on their faces.  It seemed as though they were insulated from mental pain by the close knit community they lived in.  Perhaps we are using part of what they have known for so long right here on this board.  Those in need of guidance and advice seek, those who understand listen and offer support, and those precious few offer a wisdom of truth for us all to savor. 

 


*MovinOn*
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 9/13/2006 8:06 PM (GMT -6)   
I guess I'm not really looking for advice, I just know and accept who I am.  I've moved a few times and really enjoyed the change and excitement of it.  I've had a great time moving around and have learned or grown from every experience.  I make friends easily no matter where I go and meet all kinds of interesting people.  I think for me that that's what people don't understand about me, it doesn't take much to make me happy.  It just takes someone who understands...

Chartreux
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 8028
   Posted 9/13/2006 8:30 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi, MovinOn, I feel like that too... just wanna get the blank outa here sometimes too. Kinda because the people you think care really don't and the world keeps on going by... Would like to help but don't know what to say. If only!!!

LondonGirl22
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 1629
   Posted 9/14/2006 5:11 AM (GMT -6)   
I have just gone back to work after a 3 month break. I had a nervous breakdwown and thats when my anxiety/depression really took hold. I am doing so much better now and have begun to get my life back together.
I have gone back to work and have hated it. I feel like I want a fresh start where no one knows me and no one knows whats happened to me. I am currently looking for new jobs. I do know how you feel. I don't feel I am running away from anything as I have contol of my life now but I need a fresh start
Victoria
 
 
Moderator~GERD/Heartburn
Co~Moderator: Depression Forum
 
 


stronglady4me
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 470
   Posted 9/14/2006 11:05 AM (GMT -6)   
Victoria, GOOD FOR YOU!! I am so glad that you have taken the reins and are looking for a better situation for yourself. You're amazing!!
Stronglady4me
Walk in harmony


LondonGirl22
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 1629
   Posted 9/15/2006 11:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Thankyou strong lady. I dont always feel amazing but I am trying hard. I am looking for new jobs at the moment so wish me luck!!!!
Victoria
 
 
Moderator~GERD/Heartburn Forum
Co~Moderator: Depression Forum
 
 


wmnak
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1123
   Posted 9/15/2006 12:34 PM (GMT -6)   

Atta girl, Victoria!  We all need a change of scene from time to time; and it is important to recognize when we are running TO vs running FROM. 

Several posts in this thread have used the word 'excitement.'  Perhaps that's what it takes to get our adrenals past the depression and activated toward a goal.  It's certainly impossible for me to get excited about the day to day drudgery - but when something new and/or interesting comes along, the fog lifts.  Isn't that what "get a life" means?   :-)


LondonGirl22
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Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 1629
   Posted 9/16/2006 7:08 AM (GMT -6)   
Thanks wmnak

I dont want to feel I am running away from my problems, I want to feel positive about moving on.
I sent off an application yesterday so will wiat to hear from that. Im so nervous!

Thanks for your reply
Take care
Victoria
 
 
Moderator~GERD/Heartburn Forum
Co~Moderator: Depression Forum
 
 


els
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Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4029
   Posted 9/16/2006 10:40 AM (GMT -6)   
Vic I am very proud of you and I know that going back into the same work environment must of been incredibly stressful for you.  I hope you do find another job real soon but in the mean time hang in there and stay focused and positive that good things will come your way.
 

Elisha
Co~Mod: Depression
Moderator: Heart & Cardiovascular Disease
http://www.healingwell.com/donate


Sunnee
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 19
   Posted 9/16/2006 9:46 PM (GMT -6)   
I have felt that way sooo many times... that I just wanted to move away from everyone.. the headaches.. the drama etc.. I have never done it as I couldn't move away from my Mother. I have a hard enough time dealing with my own issues that I don't want to hear the, "he said/she said" kinda thing... especially when it's a constant thing.. I've actually avoided certain people in my own family because of this. (re-reading this i've realized how awful this may sound... I'm there to help any family member or friend as much as possible.. as long as it's not, "so and so said this and yesterday they said that.. oh and last week they were telling so and so the same thing"...)

On a lighter note.. good luck Victoria on your new job search.. I have just taken a sick leave from work and I too will be off for 3 months
Building my bridge and getting over it


*MovinOn*
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 9/19/2006 9:38 PM (GMT -6)   
Victoria, you made me realize that what I am seeking is a frest start. I'm not really one to run away from things, but rather run toward new hopes and dreams. For some reason, I forgot that until I read your post. Thank you. I wish you the best on your fresh start and I hope you find what you're looking and hoping for.

Maude
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 18
   Posted 10/2/2006 6:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Okay, let me just say that I love moving and starting over, but here is this story I heard once that I think about sometimes:
 
     There was an old man sitting outside of a town along the roadway.  A man in traveling clothes carrying a big sack on his back came up the road toward the town and stopped to talk to the old man.  "How do you find this town?" the traveller asked.  "Are the peolpe nice, the streets clean, and the economy good?"
     "How were things in the last town you lived in?" the old man asked.
     "Terrible!" the traveller replied.  "There wasn't one person I could trust, the streets were filthy, and it was impossible to make any money."
     "Oh," the old man said, "You'll find that things are about the same here."
     The traveller thanked the old man for his information and went on down the road to try a different town.
     Not much time later another traveler came down the road toward the town and stopped to talk to the old man.  He also wore traveller's cloths and carried a heavy sack, but seemed much more cheerful than the previous traveler.  He also stopped to talk to the old man.
     "Hello good sir!" he said.  "Could you tell me what this town is like--are the people friendly, streets clean, and the economy thriving?"
     "How were things in the last town you lived in?" the old man asked.
     "Fabulous!" the cheerful traveller replied.  "I had good friends and good work."
     "Oh," said the old man, "You'll find this town to be very similar to that."
     "Thank you," the cheerful traveller said, and continued on into the town.

els
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4029
   Posted 10/3/2006 1:18 PM (GMT -6)   
Very cute Maude! tongue

Elisha
Co~Mod: Depression
Moderator: Heart & Cardiovascular Disease
http://www.healingwell.com/donate


jeffchem
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 10/3/2006 2:33 PM (GMT -6)   
I too would like to move on. I have this feeling every now and then. Sometimes I have acted on it and then I want to move on from there. So moving on may not be a help.

memyselfandi
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 10
   Posted 10/4/2006 7:26 PM (GMT -6)   

When ever I moved my problems followed me.   

Mental illnes moves where you move.

rach

 


H8NLIFE
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 10
   Posted 10/8/2006 5:13 AM (GMT -6)   
I live in a very large urban area (actually suburbs) and was born and raised in a fairly large city in SE VA. My father moved us here many years ago for better work opportunities, and needless to say it was one heck of a social shock.
 
In later years, I was driving a tractor-trailer and moved to NC. Bought a home in a rural area and was very happy (what happiness was allowed with my wife). Work conditions caused me to move back here and I really think this last shock was what pushed me over the edge. I was using alcohol prior to this but the move caused increased and abusive use.
 
I really think that moving down again and having a much simpler lifestyle would help with whatever is haunting me. But am tied here due to wife's career and family. 
 
Am thinking of going down by myself and finding a place to live well out in the country.

sexysue
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 60
   Posted 10/8/2006 2:47 PM (GMT -6)   
i feel like escaping all the time now . my 16 years old son was killed by a train in march of this year 2006 , my uncle died of cancer 5 weeks exactly after my son's death , gave birth to my daughter , was put into a mental health hospital without my newborn daughter and other son who is 8 years old who is being looked by my family now , feed dangerous toxic drugs for my depression by the doctors while being under their supervision in the hospital , 4 very adrupt withdrawals from the drugs they gave me , boyfriend in jail and now i could have the illness they call fibromyalgia . all this stuff has happened one after another . yes you have got it very lucky . am still depressed . the drugs they gave me was not working for me . i am not on anything now . so think on sweetie . sorry to be hard on you but there are people out there like myself who is much more worse off than you . skull

H8NLIFE
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 10
   Posted 10/8/2006 3:31 PM (GMT -6)   
sexysue said...
 
 yes you have got it very lucky . am still depressed . the drugs they gave me was not working for me . i am not on anything now . so think on sweetie . sorry to be hard on you but there are people out there like myself who is much more worse off than you . 
 
 
confused
 
'Nuff said I see...Always been alone...Seems I will always be alone.
 
I am a rock...an island. Who needs others? Seems I had it right the first go-around...
 
So what else is new?
 
...sheesh...

Post Edited (H8NLIFE) : 10/8/2006 2:34:13 PM (GMT-6)

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