I agree with everything said so far. I think you need to stop focussing on looking for that "special someone" as you put it. Sometimes when you are trying too hard, everything backfires. It sounds like what you need most is to learn to "love thyself". A "special relationship" is not there to simply boost your self-esteem. A "special relationship" is a give and take of looking after each others needs. You cannot rely solely on a partner to give you self-esteem and make you feel good about
yourself. It's too much to ask of any one person. Therefore, you may find taking yourself out of the dating game for awhile, focussing on yourself, building your self-esteem as mentioned above, figuring out who you are, what makes you tick, what makes you interesting, what makes you happy, and you know what, once you are in a comfortable place, that special someone may show up when you are least expecting it, because that person will be able to see you for what you are and you will be able to build a healthy relationship that's built on mutual respect for each other. You can't hang all your hats on someone else's coat rack, after awhile, they're just going to get fed up with having to carry all your baggage. The bottom line is, if you dont' respect yourself, no one else will. It's tough love.
I do think you are on the right track with the therapy and what not though. See your doctor if you have concerns about
your meds, but meds alone will not solve your problems. They just make it so you can function enough to work on your problems.
And remember, everyone is beautiful. And supermodels and such, are all air brushed to perfection! They are not "real", but you are! Be true to yourself.
It would be easier to tell people I have cancer than it is to tell them I am severely depressed.....