Wow, you really have been through a lot. A lot of kids that start on the street at such an early age don't make it to middle age.
I can see how you would have mixed feelings about your mother. How does one make a decision in a situation like that? I have a stepson that put my wife and I through hell. Especially me. He was an only child, and felt I ruined his "good thing" when I came into the family when he was 11.
I had to do right by him even though at times I hated him. Why? Answer - because I couldn't live with myself if I didn't. That's the way I'm built.
I have Crohn's Disease so having the stress my stepson gave me didn't help. I delt with it and am in remission now. Thank God.
I don't know what's right for you. It seems to me, you have to decide what you will do by how you will feel about yourself after you do it. I'm talking about in relation to your mother. Either way, I wish you the best.