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rainey
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 1/3/2007 6:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Just wanted to let everyone know My husband has been locked up!  I'm no longer in danger and I hve my youngest daughter back home with me now.   

hollygo
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 40
   Posted 1/3/2007 8:14 PM (GMT -7)   
rainey, i am so glad to hear that. you need to find a place to go before he gets out. with some guys, a restraining order isn't enough to keep them from coming home. i know. good luck and please keep posting!

Jeannie143
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 6056
   Posted 1/3/2007 11:46 PM (GMT -7)   
Rainey,
You mentioned in a previous post that you co-own some property with your husband. Now would be a good time to get a lawyer and straighten out the finances to apply for a divorce. He doesn't appear to be getting better, in fact he has gotten worse in the last month. A good lawyer will be able to get you the financial resources you need to keep on supporting yourself and still leave your husband with enough to keep him going as well. Move out and get a very big dog at the pound. They are inexpensive protection and will love and guard you through anything. Just my 2¢.
~ Jeannie

"People are like stained glass windows: They sparkle and shine when the sun's out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is light within."

- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 1/4/2007 5:34 AM (GMT -7)   
Rainey
Ok first step is to get a no contact order,make sure it is for both you and your daughter. Go to your daughters school and talk to the principal and tell them about the no contact order. You don't have to go into detail,but you need to let them know that he is violent.They will help you protect your daughter. For you,you need to find a manager at your job that you can trust and do the same as you did at your daughters school.This is no time for pride,this is now life and death. Talk to a couple of neighbors that can see your house from the front,side and back. Tell them the same.
Second step is to make sure you are aware of any bond,and make a mental note of who might pay that bond for him. You need to be alert. If he gets out,he is going to be more angry than you ever saw him. He is going to blame you for him being in jail. He is going to blame you for ruining his reputation with his family and friends.
I got the most severe beatings after his bail was posted. Right now you need to find people you can trust. Don't assume you can trust anyone. Don't assume you can trust his family even though they have told you they don't like what he does. When it comes down to it he is still their son.
It is up to you to protect yourself and your daughter. And this is the time in life that you are going to have to be the strongest. Be alert, go with your gut.If something does not feel right (that car that has been sitting in the same place for a few hours ect ect) then call the police. Don't worry about being "jumpy,it is your life and your daughters.
Another suggestion,I don't know about the police where you are,but here they have cell phones that they give out. They are only to be used to call 911. But if you don't have a cell phone get one. Also you need to get some Mace,and some other type of protection. Don't leave the house without it.
I know this all sounds scary,and I am trying to scare you. This is the time that you have to be most careful..why? Well when you are in the same house as him you see where he is, you have gotten good on detecting his moods and you have learned how to duck. But,when he is outside the house,you have no idea where he is. Remember his moods,remember what he looks like before he strikes.
And please even if it is just one line a day saying " I am ok". post here so we know you are making it thru.
My prayers and heart are with you and your daughter.
Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Post Edited (ShynSassy) : 1/4/2007 5:43:32 AM (GMT-7)


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 1/4/2007 8:05 AM (GMT -7)   
My dream for all men like that is that they are recarnated into a woman that is beaten and mentally abused every day!!!!
Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


rainey
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 1/4/2007 3:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi
Thank you so much for the advice.  I'm a mess right now, I know.  I have so many mixed emotions running thru my head.  I am thankful that I have you guys to talk to.  You know it took all these years of being married and going thru this abuse to actually open up to people, reach out to get help.  Like I said I even tried to get help thru my doctor and she ended up putting me on Lexapro.  Thanks for being such a caring group of people.

1dayatatime
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 119
   Posted 1/4/2007 5:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Rainey........you are on my mind. I am worried about you and am saying many prayers for you and the kids.
Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help......

Sending many hugs

Levonne

 "I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It is there all the time."
– Anna Freud

Major Depression, Anxiety/Panic Disorder, ADHD, Binge Eating Disorder, PTSD, Degenerative Disc Disease (post Fusion),  Osteoarthritis, Fibromyalgia,  Restless Leg Syndrome, Migraine Syndrome, Interstitial Cystitis, IBS, GERD

 


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 1/5/2007 6:49 AM (GMT -7)   
I had posted but I decided to delete.............
LYN
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 
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                God Bless .........Lyn
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                              Loads of Love n Support
                                        Lyn   
 
 
 
                                  
                          
                                  

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