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Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 1/23/2007 5:10 AM (GMT -7)   
I usually post on the anxiety/panic forum.. but I feel I cannot post what I feel there, as at the moment, I am not feeling anxious or panicky.
 
In fact I have been depressed for some weeks, and don't know what to do.
 
I have become reclusive.  I hate seeing people, but try to cover it up with drinking and such, and dating tons of people.
 
I am on Lexapro and Ativan, but I have my doubts the Lexapro is even working because I feel so down and "not willing to do anything" that I can't even get out of bed most days.
 
I couldn't get of bed today.  I blamed it on being sick, when really I didn't even want to move and could have layed there forever, just thinking about nothing.
 
I've always been depressed... my whole life in fact... bouts of strong feelings of depression so overwhelming and manic I want to just end it, but don't. 
 
I don't even know why I'm depressed, I just am.  I can't shake myself of this, and it's frustrating.
 
I just needed to talk.
 
*sighs*
 
To any that have read this, thanks for listening.
 
Twiggygal~


"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 
 
 
Help support Healing Well and its' forums and chatrooms... donate today.... http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 1/23/2007 5:47 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Twiggy,
I think the first thing you should do is make an appoinment to see your doctor. Tell them how you are feeling,they might want to change your meds to be able to cover the panic/anxiety attacks,and then the depression.
Drinking is a bad remedy for depression. You feel good at the time,but the next morning sets in,and it can make the depression worse (I am talking from experience here).
Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 1/23/2007 6:12 AM (GMT -7)   
The Lexapro helps with the anxiety... bu tno tat all with the panic attacks.

The only thing that REMOTELY helps my panic attacks is the Ativan, so I doubt the Lex is helping with that, or my depression.

It's just frustrating, cuz I'm scared to try another med...

Seriously scared.

I know drinking is bad, it's terribly bad, and I sometimes turn to it in the darkest of times... because it's easy to escape that way for the night.. but I know as wlel it won't help in the long run...

Thank you SO much for replying. When I get some money gathered up I'm going to call my doc to make an appt. (I have no health insurance)

Twiggygal~
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 
 
 
Help support Healing Well and its' forums and chatrooms... donate today.... http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


Suzy35
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 248
   Posted 1/23/2007 6:42 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Twiggy,

Depression is horrid. I had it with my anxiety and both of them together drove me mad. I would call your doc and tell them whats going on. If you have to take another med, it's worth it to cope with the depression. Talk it out too, it helps.

HUGS!!!!!

LondonGirl22
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 1629
   Posted 1/23/2007 3:00 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Twiggy,
 
Sorry to hear you are feeling so depressed.  I was taking lexapro before my admission to hospital and they changed my meds to effexor.  The effexor has really helped with the depression and also has reduced my anxiety and panic a lot.  Everyone responds differently to meds so what works for one, doesnt always work for another.  I took Ativan in hospital but unfortunatley, in the uk, it is not prescribed for outpatients.
 
Talk to your doctor about how you are feeling and he may increase your lexapro or change you to another med perhaps.  There are things he can do to lift your depression and there are lots of anti depressant medications out there. 
 
Alcohol is a depressant itself so unfortunatley it won't be making you feel much better as it will be working against your meds.
 
Please talk to your doc about how you are feeling and keep in touch.
 
Keep posting and take care x

Victoria x


 

Co ~ Moderator for the Depression Forum

 

XX Life is worth living XX

 


jordaNZone
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 752
   Posted 1/24/2007 1:13 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Twiggygal..
Well, you are one of the kindest people I know...it seems to me that all your life you have been a 'giver' - and sometimes we get tired of 'giving' eh?
Time to take time out for 'you' tongue
When was the last time you got your paints out and had a splash, or did some sketching? Hmmm?
And while your anxiety is at a low..how about going to the Mall for a little 'retail therapy'? hehehe - I wish I could come with you, but it's such a long way to fly lol.
(((HUGS))) Twiggygal..
Be kind to yourself...
Loves
Maree
 
 
 

Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 1/24/2007 3:21 AM (GMT -7)   
I am going to make an appointment with my doc to see if I can have the Lexapro dosage upped, but I am on the max dose that doctors typically give to patients.. which is 20 mgs.

It's frustrating and I get so sad and I have my highs and lows, but mostly just lows.

I really don't even know how to feel happy in new relationships or anything. I just always find the negative in everything.

I don't know what to do but I need to get on either another med or have my dosage upped I think.

Maree- the last time I got my paints out was 3 weeks ago. Last time I sketched was over a month ago. *sigh* I miss painting and I think I need to start painting again because I was a lot happier when I was doing things I enjoyed..

The mall SCARES me and you know that!! hehe....

I think I might be getting worse with my panic.. I don't know. It feels hopeless, and makes me even more depressed because I feel like I will never be normal without meds again.

And I can't stop drinking. Help.

Twiggygal~
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 
 
 
Help support Healing Well and its' forums and chatrooms... donate today.... http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


els
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4031
   Posted 1/24/2007 5:13 AM (GMT -7)   

Hey Twiggy, It's a good idea making an appointment with your doc.  On Lexapro the recommended maintance dosage is a max of 20 mg per day but this always depends upon the patient and your doctor can go above the recommended dosage if necessary.  I have had clients on 30 & 40 mg of Lexapro and they have done well with it so dont be afraid of what the printed data states. 

I also have anxiety and panic with my depression and it is horrid.  I take Effexor XR and it has helped some with this but not always.  I avoid crowed places like the mall, grocery stores during their busy times and what not.  My doctor has me on Xanax PRN for my panic problems.  I try not to take it but sometimes I just have to. 

I used to drink alot too when I was younger.  I guess I felt more open and outgoing when I was drinking and able to meet people easier.  I put myself in alot of bad situations which could of turned out way worse I guess.  The thing of it was that drinking for me didnt solve anything, the people I met werent really worth knowing, and in the end I was only hurting myself.  If you want to stop drinking and know that you have a problem with it there are many places that you can turn to for help with this. 


Elisha
Co~Mod: Depression
Moderator: Heart & Cardiovascular Disease
http://www.healingwell.com/donate


jordaNZone
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 752
   Posted 1/24/2007 10:44 PM (GMT -7)   
Glad you gonna seek help with your meds twiggy..Els has given you fantastic advice..you will be fine :)
Have faith in yourself ok!
You have no doubt gone thru worse setbacks than this..and you have survived eh? Can you remember what you did last time to pull yourself out of the 'blues' - whatever it was try that again coz you know it works :))
Loves
Maree
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