No Idea Why I Am Posting

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Monika
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 8
   Posted 2/12/2007 4:58 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello
 
I have no idea why I feel the need to post here. I am desperate to vent to people I don't have to face on a daily basis, I suppose. I have a Livejournal, as well, and many friends on there, but I guess I don't want to look like I am complaining.
 
I should be very happy. Essentially, I guess I am. I have had a really rough... time. I don't feel like typing a long life sob story because that's not the point of why I'm here, I guess I am just frustrated with myself for not being able to deal with it all and come out on top. Today I am super frustrated and tired and I just want to sleep. I should be happy. Despite all that has happened over the last 11 years or so, I have now graduated from University, I have a job I really like, I have a great girlfriend who I am living with, my family is great, and even though there are some things that suck, I am sure the good outweighs the bad.
 
Yet over the last few weeks all I have wanted to do was sleep and sleep and sleep and I have no idea why.
 
Are we allowed to talk about prescriptions on this site? I am on a few anyway, I just got back on them on Friday, and I swear they aren't helping at all, not that they have ever "magically helped" in any less than their 6-8 week expected time, but I swear they are just making it WORSE.
 
Sorry this is so incoherent. The more time passes, the more there is to tell. Then the more there is to type, and the more pathetic everything sounds. Then it just looks like you wanted a bunch of internet "*hugs*" or whatever, and that isn't what I wanted or came for, not that I have any idea what I wanted or came for anyway. Who knows. I'm sure everyone has a story to tell.
 
That's it for now, I guess.
 
Monika

countrygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 550
   Posted 2/13/2007 4:52 AM (GMT -7)   
 If this is depression or anything near that,please get help.You sound like I use to be,very up and positive,but thinds changed.But with help I am almost back to normal.....Take care :-)
I use to have a handle on life ,But it broke!!!!
 
I suppose I'm derranged..
 
 
Why I have not begun to Defile myself...


pahiatua
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 43
   Posted 2/14/2007 2:34 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi,

Well my brother has depression, so he's always in a bad mood. I always stay away from him, but he's been happier lately which is great because he is doing year 12 (big year) so my guess is that he was just stressed about year 11 and was falling behind or something.
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wmnak
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1123
   Posted 2/14/2007 3:51 PM (GMT -7)   
monika,
 
"i should feel happy but i'm not."  why not?  to a very great extent we chose our feelings and our actions.  some say, "so and so made me do it."  others say, "such and such made me feel this way."  to those people i say, "horsehockey!"
 
i know that i'm not a dr, therapist, or councelor.  i am a 61 yr old male who has lived through more h*lls than you could ever imagine in your worst nightmare.  i can gige you my personal experience.
 
look at it this way.  let's say you are in an airplane flying at 20,000 feet.  all of a sudden the plane banks and you fall out.  no parachute.  you have two choices.  you can curse god, the pilot, your ancestry, and everythinng else over, on, and under the earth.  or you can turn around and watch the last sunset and the differing greens on the forest and the blue in the river.  and you can do that for the rest of your life.  it's a choice.
 
i know that those of us with chronic depression usually need help in making this choice iin the form of medication and therapy.  but ultimately, it's our choice and ours alone.
 
warren
That light at the end of he tunnel?  It's an on-coming train.
 
Some day you'll learn that a good bm is better than sex.
 
Insanity is defined as doing the same actions over and over again and expecting a different outcome.


jordaNZone
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 752
   Posted 2/15/2007 1:07 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Monika..welcome to HW tongue
Well you seem to be fed up with feeling the way you do just now..great that you are back on your meds and have new ones..so I guess you have been to the doctor and discussed how you have been feeling lately and maybe have had blood tests done etc?
I am wondering if you have thought about going to counselling..you say you have been thru heaps over the years -  and sometimes we carry stuff around with us that we dont even realise we have until it weighs us down!
Be patient with the meds..seek prof help and all will be well.
Maree
 
Forum Moderator - Depression

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