and life continues as usual........

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

Gemsi
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 1050
   Posted 3/25/2007 9:05 AM (GMT -7)   
Last time I posted on here. I'd just been up to the hospital to see my psychiatrist. She'd upped my Sertraline to 150mg. Aswell as that, my team gave me 2 new antibiotics (Clarythromycin and Augementin) and orderd me to take regular doses of paracetamol and Nefopam to battle pain.
 
I took the first dose of all these on Thursday (My appointment was on a Wednesday) 40 minutes later however, I'm throwing up eveywhere, constinuous tears streaming down my face, I could hardley lift my head from the sofa, and had gone pure white.
I was rushed back up to the hospital, and stayed in for 2 weeks. They reduced my sertraline back to 100mg, told me to take no more painkillers, started me on 3 different antisickness meds (cyclizine, domperidone and metoclopromide) and a nice saline and dextrose drip. Eventually they stabalised me back into a more normal condition.
 
Since coming home however (I've been out a week as of last Wednesday), I've been feeling really really low. My depression is coming back fast, and I'm feeling more and more down.
I'm just wanting to sleep continuously, it's taking a lot to rouse me, and when I do wake,I just want to curl up and go back to sleep.
 
What happened when I went into hospital, still hasn't been diagnosed. But they took away the antibiotics aswell. The pharmacist doesn't want me to up my sertraline again, or take any of those antibiotics, until they can work it out.
 
My psychiatrist wants me to go back onto Mirtazapine, as while they thought I used to be allergic, the symptoms were probably just coincedence. I agree, that it's something I'd like to do, as for me to feel healthier, I need to feel happier. At the moment all my energy is going into making myself feel happier, by walking to bf's mum's house, getting dressed up, and plastering on makeup. All these things take a lot of energy,which I need for batteling with my health. While I'm wanting to get out of the house though, I'm also finding, I can't until Ifind a way in which I feel comfortable to leave it. Which is where the makeup and dressing up comes in.
 
The pharmacy however is saying no too anything my psychiatrist is saying which may help me, and it's getting annoying, as I just don't have the energy or mental strength for fighting my health and depression. I think this could possibly be why I'm so tired.
 
I have the mirtazapine at home anyway, and I know there still on my GP precription. I want to start on small dose, just while I'm waiting for the pharmacy, but the pharmacy won't explain to us why there refusing me having 2 antidpressants. So I'm worriedto start on Mirtazapine, if it's something bad.
 
I know that life can't be solved by antidepressants, and one day I will probably have to come off them. But right now, it's something I need. I have a lot going on in my little mind, and I just need it numbed down, so I can put some concentration into healing myself.
 
Also they've took me off my antisickness meds, and I'm starting to not eat again, due to feeling sick. Pharmacy keep telling me the 3 shouldn't work together, but they have been doing. 2 of them were doing nothing, but add the third, and it was making a perfect combination for my body.
Unfortunately though, there also raising my prolactin levels. So they've had to be removed from my list.
 
It's just annoying as I can live with the little side effects, as long as I can still be awake, and happy, and not in pain. It's weird, as there content to give me huge doses of IV antibiotics about 3 times the quantity a person should have,and let them poisen my whole system, making me feel worse. But there not happy to give me the things that cause raised prolactin levels, or hiccups or some little thing like that. I really think they need to sort there priorities out.
 
I should be really happy right now, we've finally got money for wedding. But I can't help feeling stressed and sad. I'm also worried, as i'm just waiting for my weight to drop off again,and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I've tried making every meal I eat,high calorie, but i end up feeling full and sick quicker. If I force feed when feeling sick, I throw up.
If my weights not back soon, I'm gonna start getting an increase in infections, which means more poisenous IV's been pumped through my system.
 
The hospital should be making me feel better not worse, surely?
 
The only thing that's easing my pain right now is physical pain. But if I keep getting piercings to make myself feel better, l'm gonna look like a pin cusion. sad    Plus, although Ihave just had my eyebrow pierced because I wanted it done, there's nothing else I want done. I wouldn't causephysical pain any otherway, as I don't want to haveto spend any more time at the hospital. And I've been warned next step if my depression gets where i have to hurt myself is 2 weeks on the psychiatric ward.     
 
Sorry for babbling, long post.
I didn't realise I have more on my mind than I thought. I just want to feel like a used to. and be able to cope like I did when in school. Unfortunately hiding under my coat is no longer seen as a constructive method of dealing with my depression.
 
I hope everyone else is ok
XxXxX
 
 
 
 


It's true!: Smile and the whole world smiles with you. Frown and the world turns upside down.
 Diagnosed with: Cystic Fibrosis, Asthma, ABPA, Clinical Depression, Mild liver cirrohsis, mild osteopenia. Waiting for final diagnosis on Muscular Dystrophy type symptoms.
 Allergies: Any dressing except Mepilex border. Even plasters make my skin blister. Hayfever, Tazocin, Tobromycin, Ibruprofen, Asprin, Codeine, Mirtazapine.
I have a pretty little port-a-cath on left side of chest wall

Post Edited (Darkies Gem) : 3/25/2007 10:12:00 AM (GMT-6)


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 3/26/2007 5:16 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Darkies
Wow,I was wondering where you were. I am so sorry that you are going through all of this.
I do however see the light at the end of the tunnel. You said you had enough for the wedding,which is great. Have you started making the plans for that?
I know it is frustrating for you to not be able to find the correct meds that work for you. I think the pharmacy is just trying to make sure you don't get the incorrect combo that can really hurt you. But, keep in touch with your doctor. If the meds are not working then demand that they give you something else.
Do you have support at home? I hope you do as it sounds like you really need it.
Use this board to vent your frustrations,that is what we are here for.
Stay strong and keep us posted.

Shy
Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

www.healingwell.com/donate

"I am woman,hear me roar one day and cry the next!!!"


Gemsi
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 1050
   Posted 3/26/2007 6:28 AM (GMT -7)   
Yer, they've already agreed I do need more support than what I've been getting.

My boyfriend has dropped down to doing only 5 hours a day at work. It gives me an extra 3 hours with him, but it's still not enough.

His family live really close by,about 100 meters away, but when I'm feeling really weak and down, I don't like to trouble them, as they worry too much and dodaft things like taking days off work.

My psychiatrist is trying to get me some support from a councillor near by. So if I am feeling down, I've always got someone to chat to. She's also trying to find me something to do in my area, just to get me out of house. Aftr a year though, she's still trying to find something suitable for me, and close enough to home.

The wedding plans are coming some time soon. Just have to get in touch with registery office, as were having the reception at my bf's mum's house, so we have less to organise. Were trying to arrange for august, so I can wear a pretty dress. Means i egt to go dress shopping aswell. I get my wheelchair soon, which should make shopping even easier for me, and a lot less stressful.

Just found out today, as soon as they find me a bed in the hospital, I'm back in for another 2 weeks for IV antibiotics. I can't battle my infection off, so I'm being ordered to rest, and let them worry about everythingfor 2weeks. It also means I get another 2 weeks off having to force medication down my neck, as they do it for me.Might be about a week before they can get me a bed, but hopefully they can sort some health issues out for me, so i have less to deal with.

I actually believe my doctor's been reading another forum I go on,as when I rang today, he was a lot more accepting of the fact I'm feeling ill again, I didn't have to explain much for a change.

I'm gonna miss Paul a lot while I'm in hospital, we live about 2 ours away from it, so he can't come up very often. I think getting my health back on track is going to be vital if I want to be able to sort my depression back out. Even though it will dip while I'm in hospital, as being stuck in there annoys me.I get annoyed with nurses and doctors, and the fact they won't lt me leave the ward if they have me on a saline drip.

I still feel really really low, but I suppose my light at the end of the tunnel will actually be going into hospital again, in hopes they can sort me out. I thinkthey might have more of an idea now,about how my depression is effecting me athome. If they have been reading those forums anyway. My psychiatrist doesn't say much to my other team, unless i tell her too.

Hopefully I'll be sorted out soon, so I can get back to helping people on here, rather than being the one who needs to be helped. If I disappear again, you know where I'll be.:P

Finally....Thankyou for your response Shy, hope your well!
It's true!: Smile and the whole world smiles with you. Frown and the world turns upside down.
 Diagnosed with: Cystic Fibrosis, Asthma, ABPA, Clinical Depression, Mild liver cirrohsis, mild osteopenia. Waiting for final diagnosis on Muscular Dystrophy type symptoms.
 Allergies: Any dressing except Mepilex border. Even plasters make my skin blister. Hayfever, Tazocin, Tobromycin, Ibruprofen, Asprin, Codeine, Mirtazapine.
I have a pretty little port-a-cath on left side of chest wall


els
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4031
   Posted 3/26/2007 6:52 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Darkies, I just wanted to pop in and say hang in there...it sucks being in the hospital I know, but Shy is right there is light at the end of the tunnel you just have to look for it and keep your eye on it dear.  I will be thinking of you...take care :-)

Elisha
Co~Mod: Depression
Moderator: Heart & Cardiovascular Disease
http://www.healingwell.com/donate


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 3/27/2007 5:21 AM (GMT -7)   
Darkies
Trust your doctors,it sounds like they are really there for you and that is great.
I know that 2 weeks seems like forever,but focus on healing and then once that is over you can focus on your new life with your husband!!
Please keep us posted and stay strong

Shy
Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

www.healingwell.com/donate

"I am woman,hear me roar one day and cry the next!!!"

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Saturday, December 10, 2016 11:19 PM (GMT -7)
There are a total of 2,736,222 posts in 301,362 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 151453 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, LvGuy1.
193 Guest(s), 1 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
(Seashell)


Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook  Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter  Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
Advertisement
Advertisement

©1996-2016 HealingWell.com LLC  All rights reserved.

Advertise | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer