Has this happened to you?

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_Christina
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 553
   Posted 5/20/2007 10:45 AM (GMT -7)   
 
Last week Tuesday I felt great (see post: Meds Working???).  By Friday I had slipped again.  While I felt great I got to work on all the things that I had been meaning to get to. 
At work there were reports to write, clients to contact, stock to track down, meetings to attend, backlogged charting to write, etc. 
At home there was the laundry, the living room, the bedroom, the kitchen, the bathroom, the yard (all were disasters). 
There are 3 beautiful girls that still want to cuddle and play and go to the park.  They need to be brought to ballet and karate for lessons 3 time a week.
I am gearing up for school, so I have forms to fill out and I need to figure out how to pay for food while I go to school.  I need to figure out what I need to do and then get that done.
Then there is church.  I am in leadership (and they are my support group) and the responsibilities are heavy.  I am signed up for survey collection and advertisement for a kid's party June 3.  (create fliers, invitations, radio spots, posters and get them distributed though the area) I also have to be there for Sunday morning and evening services and Wednesday evening prayer meetings.
 
Shortly after the "fog" lifted I made an assessment of what I needed to do, and became paralized.  It was too much.  I couldn't do it all, so I couldn't do anything. I got depressed again because I was overwhelmed.
 
I did a couple of things in the right direction.  I gave away the advertisement responsibility.  The survey is done for now.  I stayed home from Sunday morning services, even though I sent the kids.  I made a list and cleaned the kitchen.  I'm gonna start on the living room next.  I still feel overwhelmed.
 
Have any of you done this, feel a little bit better and go overbord?  I just want to get better.  I want to beat this thing.  I think I am winning, then round two comes along and I fall flat.  Recovery makes me worse?  What is your take?
Christina
 
When you cannot stand, on whom do you lean?


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/20/2007 2:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Christina
Oh yeah this happens to me ALL of the time.
I am sure it is the anxiety and panic attacks. It is so hard to deal with though.
I too have all of the work responsibilities,then I have to make sure the house is clean,laundry is done ect ect,and then try to figure out when I can sleep!
At some point we need to be able to breath!
Here is something that has helped me,I started a basic list.Then gave my list a timeline..reminding myself that not everything has to be done within an hour! LOL ...


Please stay strong

Shy
Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia
Meds I have taken throughout the years:Wellbutrin,Tranxene,Paxil,Prozac,Valium,
Currently taking none.
www.healingwell.com/donate

"I am woman,hear me roar one day and cry the next!!!"


_Christina
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 553
   Posted 5/20/2007 6:25 PM (GMT -7)   
I have always felt that I could handle any amount of responsibility, any amount of activities as long as I could physically get to each place when I needed to be there. My biggest problem was to remember that I needed to schedule travel time from place to place.
For years people have been saying that they could never do my schedule. I knew that it was difficult. as long as I got myself up and to the next place I could do it.
Ever since my "breakdown" I can't do that. I can't handle half of what I could before. I had feelings of depression before my 2 week "vacation", and I felt like I was on a runaway train, I couldn't do things well, but I couldn't stop either. Now, I can't seem to start.
My counselor says I have a "savior complex". I need to be able to do all things for people. I need to be able to meet the need instead of saying "sorry, I can't". I get incredibly guilty just saying "no" to something I cannot do. It's worse when it is something I used to do- but can't anymore. It's nearly impossible for me when I "could" do what was asked- it's just that if i do, I can't do what I should do.
I can't seem to put my own needs above other's without feeling guilty. The only legitimate reason for "no" is if I am directly at that particular moment and I can't reschedule anything.
Now, if I start filling my schedule I freeze up and have to empty it again.
Christina
Christina
 
When you cannot stand, on whom do you lean?


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/21/2007 5:26 AM (GMT -7)   
Christina
I really hope that you start to feel better.
We live in the times where lives are so busy,it is so easy to become overwhelmed.
Maybe it is time for a nice long vacation?



Shy
Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia
Meds I have taken throughout the years:Wellbutrin,Tranxene,Paxil,Prozac,Valium,
Currently taking none.
www.healingwell.com/donate

"I am woman,hear me roar one day and cry the next!!!"

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