I agree with Jeannie too.
But to deal with stress, maybe you should try something other than pills? I think you sound like you need to take some time out to yourself and maybe try meditation? I don't mean that you have to go so far as to go into a trance or anything! But if you can just picture a tranquil scene and concentrate on your breathing, that will help so much. (I know that sounds quite simplistic but I find it helps me sometimes, and stress really does affect blood sugar levels).
I'm sure it will also help if you talk to your family about this. The more open you are the less scared they need to be about it. Show them that you can't be super mum all the time, that sometimes they need to support you. Share this with them. We all need help from our loved ones. It's amazing that people who you think are the strongest are usually the ones that are feeling the most weak and vulnerable...
I've had a bad couple of days with the sugar levels and I'm not feeling too great about it, but I am going to work on it. It's just an ongoing process - the one thing I'm learning to accept is that with this illness there is no getting to the finish line. It isn't like taking a course of pills and then finishing them, we have to keep working on this our whole lives. We HAVE to make changes in our lives in order for this to work out fine, there is no quick fix. But as long as we make the changes we will be healthy (or happy/less stressed etc). I'm just rambling now! But this is about choices, and if you choose to make your life better then you can do it. Make choices with your partner and children to lessen the stress on you.
I hope it goes well today - I'm thinking of you!
It sounds like your friends have just gotten used to you being around for them and take advantage a bit. It's awkward to say no sometimes, so maybe it would make it easier for you to speak to your friends and ask them to not bother you on, say Tuesdays and Thursdays? I know it sounds a bit extreme to ask your friends to do this, but if it's affecting you they need to know. Or maybe even just explain to them that you are struggling with your health a bit and explain why, and this will probably make them see that you need some space. Do they realise that you find it a bit too much? They probably don't realise at all just what you are feeling and so it doesn't occur to them that you may not be happy with it. I feel like I'm on my soapbox a little here!
I will try to find a website which can give you some starter tips on meditation, but in the meantime I can explain what I do. I lay down and relax every part of my body. Then I concentrate on my breathing - I take a breath and breathe out on each number from the count of 0-10, then backwards to 0 again (counting quite slowly and keeping a steady rhythm). By this time you should be nice and relaxed. Then I picture myself in a nice quiet room - in my case it is pure white with white light shining in and going into my body and cleansing all the bad feelings from me. Or, I picture myself in a open green space where there is a pond or lake. Picture yourself sitting on the edge of the lake and think of all your problems. Then, walk into the lake and dunk yourself under to get wet and all the water washes away those problems you just thought about. It's all about what you find relaxing though - if you're afraid of water this might not work! Set aside 10, 20, 30 minutes a day for yourself. You may find it useful or you may not like the idea.
I ended up in hospital recently which made me anxious about my health (well, more than normal!) and I really think this helps. We who naturally are quite stressed and nervous are never going to completely relax but it is good to gain some calm!
Allison Rose, I'm so proud of you! Well done! It's such great news about your result, too. You really do deserve a nice lunch today. xx