#1. Take care of you. If you don't do it, no one will.
#2. Join a local YMCA if possible. It's not very expensive and you can go there to do your exercise, (I swim the backstroke for about 30 minutes). I treat my Y visits as if they were trips to a mini spa. Long showers after my swim, time in the sauna, blow dry my hair without any interruptions.
#3. Check with your doctor about nutrition classes. These should be covered under your insurance. Both of you should attend so that both of you can learn together.
#4. I'd have a heart-to-heart with dear hubby if it were me. (I'm bold like that.) I'd say:
"Honey, this is it. This is the only life we get... no 'Do-Overs'. This is the hand we were dealt and we have to play it out. Now we can be miserable and unhappy and go thru each day like a thundercloud... or we can choose to find ways to enjoy the life we have.
We are still both going to have diabetes. We can go to the market together and try new vegetable ideas, take cooking classes offered by the local diabetes association or health department, do some exercises together, be loving and kind with each other...
Or we can wallow in self pity and anger, refusing to accept the reality that no matter what we do.. we... will... still... have... diabetes.
I am going to do the fun stuff. I will ride the electric carts offered at the store so I can finish my marketing without my feet hurting. I will go to the Y and swim in the early afternoon before the kids get out of school so I have the whole pool to myself... I will make the best of this life I have.... Do you want to join me? Or do you want to sit around and feel sorry for yourself? "
One of the definitions of Love is 'wanting what is best for the beloved'. This is why you can spank a child for running in the street. The spanking hurts but it is in the child's best interest to be afraid to go into the street. If you love your husband then you will want what is best for him. Telling him the truth is what is best for him. Telling him you will be there for him and support him is what is best for him. Telling him to keep trying and to keep choosing ways to show he loves you is what is best for him. Telling him to take each day as a precious gift and use it as best he can to make life as sweet as possible is what is best for him.
And if he won't travel this path with you then maybe you should start doing these things for yourself and make yourself happy. He will see your happiness and either join you or still choose to be miserable. Either way you win because you took care of you first. Don't be an enabler of his misery. Get on with life and keep going. It might just be the kick in the pants he needs to get his life in order.
And that's my 2¢...
Forum Moderator/Diabetes & Fibromyalgia
~Please remember that 50% of all doctors graduated in the bottom half of their class!
Yours may be one of them...
"People are like stained glass windows: They sparkle and shine when the sun's out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is light within."
- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross