New and seeking help for sister

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lexyloubug3
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 7/20/2005 8:27 PM (GMT -7)   
     Hello Everyone, my name is Amber and I am 21. I have a 27 yr old sister who has epilepsy, panic-anxiety attacks, migraines, is bipolar and is a hypochondriac. She had a seizure at age 17 and then nothing for 7 years with no meds or anything. She had none of the problems listed here at that time or for the following yrs. We first started to notice that she lied alot, even to my mother. Not about important things just piddly stuff so we ignored it.
     She has been married four times and has seemed pretty happy over these past yrs.
     about two yrs ago, she claimed that our boss had been harassing her sexually and had made very indecent offers of money. Then she started having seizures again and they scared her husband, or she would black out. She got migraines nearly every day and had to go to the E.R. After that she divorced him because he was seeking love elsewhere where she was lacking. She then started having suicide thoughts and was put in a mental hospital on suicide watch for three days. They did nothing but drug her up for 3 days and send her home. They did find out she had all these other problems. She got put on alot of meds and couldn't function well. So she quit taking them.
     Well, to the future. She is now still having many problems but they were under control for a while. We don't know why they have come back. She has an alcoholic boyfriend and he is only with her because he can treat her any way he wants and she will put up with it because she isn't right. She has a son with numerous behavior and mental problems and lives with a foster family, but still comes to visit her. He is 11 years old. She also has two girls, 7&9 years, who live with her. Her boyfriend, who lives with her, also has a 7 & 9 year old. They argue alot and cause stress. He argues with her and then leaves her with the kids, knowing she will have a seizure, he doesn't take her to the hospital or even keep her kids( or his for that matter ) if she has to go. When she has a seizure the kids get scared and call 911. Then the EMTs call us to go get her kids. My mother and I have both missed work to take care of her. We can't even make plans to do things because they get ruined. She is at the hospital 1-4 times a week and we can't live like this anymore.
     Today, she called me to take her to a hospital in another city. My mom had hand surgery this morning and after working untill 4 am I had to drive her for 2 hours to Indianapolis and back. When we got back at 1:00, I had to take my daughter to have her immunizations.
I slept for a while when we got back and 5 minutes after I woke up she was on the phone begging me to take her to the hospital. As you can tell, I was in no shape to drive. I offered to take her kids and let her b/f drive my truck and she said he wouldn't. I found her a ride and when I went to pick her up, I told her the kids were coming with me. She said no, he would keep them. I told her they were coming with me if I had to call the police. Her b/f came out and tried to butt in and I was so mad that I called him a drunken b**tard. I got her and the kids in the truck and told her that she wasn't taking care of them. I would take them if I had to.
     I don't know what else to do to try to get her to help herself. She doesn't realize what she is doing to the kids or anyone else in the family, she is only thinking of herself right now.
     If anyone can help me in any way, I would greatly appreciate it. I am at my wits end and don't know if I am doing the right thing or not.
     Any advice about controlling seizures, panic - anxiety attacks and migraines is totally welcome.   confused            Thank You All !                                                                                                                                                                                                                                
 

lexyloubug3
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 7/21/2005 12:13 AM (GMT -7)   
     Thank you for your reply. Yes, she is on many meds right now. Sorry that I didn't make that clear, but I am sure you know what lack of sleep can do to a person. She has seen all of the doctors you listed and even spent time in St. Vincent's stress center. She has no seizures it seems, when she is in a facility. It usually occurs at stressful times and when she is around many people.
     If she calls her therapist and tells her she is having bad feelings and wants to talk about them, the therapist usually calls the ambulance immediately and they pick her up and take her to the suicide watch ward in the clinic. It is 2:09 am and she just got home from her hospital visit today for the anxiety attack and chest pains. They gave her medicine for a headache and sent her home.
     I think she may have become dependent on demerol (sorry if misspelled) just by accident. That is what she was given for migraines and she was in the hospital 1-4 times a week. It seemed like as the demerol should have been wearing off, she got a migraine. I am no doctor but it seemed like an addiction to me for a while. Finally the hospital wisened up and quit giving it to her. I will post more as I know and thank you for your support, I appreciate this very much and it's nice to know that my family is not alone in this.

lexyloubug3
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 7/21/2005 11:41 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you for the tip!

Completely new to this! I need all the help I can get LOL.

lexyloubug3
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 7/21/2005 4:06 PM (GMT -7)   
She doesn't have the internet or a phone. She used to but if she gets them turned back on I will definitely tell her.

lexyloubug3
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 7/23/2005 1:33 PM (GMT -7)   
Once my sister was at a welfare appointment. My other sis had her kids. She recieved a call from them asking about Heather's mental stability.
  
   When the lady called her back to the office she was bawling like a baby. She said some guy in the waiting room threw lighter fluid all over her. She said she washed  it off in the bathroom. Then before she left she said " Don't tell anyone I am driving cuz i'm not supposed to be driving" and ran off to her van like a bat out of hell.
 
    The social worker asked the receptionist about the man and she said there hadn't been any men in there for hours.
 
    When my sister asked Heather about it she just said I have to make them think I am crazy.
     All of this to get some SSI.
 
 
 
     I told you this so maybe you understand why it frustrates us so much. We don't know whether it's real or not. We don't know if it's for attention. I am really sick of my mom having to leave in the middle of supper, be at the ER till 1 in the morning and then having to be at work shortly after that. We can't keep plans because she calls and we have to drop everything, while her boyfriend sits at home or is out drinking.
 
 
   The kids, for the most part, are ignored and told to stay outta her face. She doesn't spend any time with them. She says they stress her out but, maybe some better parenting would help. When I picked her kids up the other day, her 9 yr old and 7 yr old were at a pool hall on the corner. Her oldest was wearing nothing but her mom's t-  shirt and underwear. Personally, I think she is a  little old for that.
 
 

lexyloubug3
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 7/24/2005 3:32 AM (GMT -7)   
First we tried talking about it, and my mom would "talk her down" over the phone to avoid a hopital visit. I actually got pretty nasty with her a few days ago. I told her I would take her kids away from her. I am so surprised that the EMTs haven't reported her and with the episode at the welfare office I am shocked she still has them anyway.

At least she wasn't talking like a zombie today.
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