Hey, just wanted to drop in a let you know you aren't alone. I think all of us have the times we want to crawl into a hole. The past two weeks have actually been like that with me. As cheesy as it sounds, it does get better. Just hang in there. You have the desire to do more with your life, and you will. If you look through some of the posts on this site, people have written about going to school, spending time with family, taking care of pets, doing all sorts of hobbies, etc. Epilepsy limits some things, but it doesn't change who you are.
It sounds like you have an idea of what you want to do, but aren't sure how. All of my friends are there who are perfectly healthy. It's ok, really.
I had a few experiences with the psych ward myself from some really weird auras. Now that I know that's what they are, I can handle them easier. It doesn't mean you're nuts, just different. And different can be a really good thing.
Please let us know how you are, syzygy, if only a word. We understand totally, and we care.
Thinking of you,