In so much pain

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QTKaren
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 605
   Posted 7/15/2008 2:05 AM (GMT -7)   
I had already brought up the bursitis thing on another post asking if anyone else gets this with fibro.  Things have changed so fast and its gotten so much worse today.  My shoulder was hurting front and back but today it started spreading and the pain went on to cover my whole right shoulder blade and down my arm to my elbow.  I had to go over to my moms so I had her rub me down with flex all and that did no good at all.  When I got home I was crying and then I had to change my top cause I was too hot and omggggggggggggg just bringing my arm up enough to get a t shirt on was the sharpest most horrible pain I have had in ages.  Then after Jay finished helping me with the shirt immediatly the pain spread down to the end of my arm and went across my thumb area.
 
I had talked to the pharmacy gal when I stopped to drop off my sharps and she said that she was pretty sure it was bursitis too but that it sounded to her like with all the swelling and fluid building up in there it had pinched off a nerve or worse case that I had a blood clot in an artery blocking blod flow.  The clot thing scared the crap outta me and I went back and forth wondering if I should go to the ER or not.  I told Jay if it got any worse I would go and if its not better by tomorrw I will go get it scanned.  Earlier today my docs nurse recommended that I use my sling from when I dislocated my other shoulder and I still had it so I put that on and it helped alot by keeping my shoulder immobil,almost right away the pain in my hand and low arm subsided so I was pretty sure I do have a nerve pinched from the swelling.  So ya,cant move my shoulder at all without horrible pain that would drop ya to your knee's and low on pain meds till refills on thursday so hurting so so much right now.  Omggggggggggggggg and right before I got online I had fallen asleep in the chair downstairs and Jay had been asleep on the couch and he wakes me up all grumpy and annoyed and I get my stuff together as best I can and he said something and I didnt hear him so I ask what and he goes"never mind just get your a## upstairs!!!
 
I didnt say a thing but burst into tears soon as i got upstairs,what a freakin jerk!!!!! he was all nice today and helpful but he wakes up grumpy and treats me like crap? what the hell?  its like someone does that to me and all the nice things they did for the day go right out the window,not to mention bring back memories of my ex being vicious.  Now I dont feel so much hurt as really po'd.   And with all thats going on with me today I still managed to get the kitchen clean and bbq him a nice dinner and do all the laundry one handed grrrrrrrrr I feel like going downstairs and slapping him.  He was all nice earlier and so concerned about my pain  sheesh serious jerk!!!  ok I am down venting and talking its really hard typin one handed and I gots to lay down.  Hugs everyone.
 
Karen
Karen
 
Mom of one gramma to 4
 
Fibromyalgia,IBS,Stroke x2,endometriosis,Diabetes type 2,neuropathic pain,nerve damage due to tailbone removel,nerve damage due to fractured back,deppresion,high blood pressure,severe nausea,atrophy,chronic pain


dinda
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 7/15/2008 4:28 AM (GMT -7)   
I am so sorry you are having this much pain. I have bursitis in my left shoulder and it really hurts. On Sunday I pulled a muscle on the left side of my back and it has really aggravated my shoulder. Today when I woke up my neck is so stiff I can hardly move it. I'm just going to go back to bed until my daughter gets up. I hope you get to feeling better. You gave me an idea maybe I need to get a sling for when my shoulder is bothering me. I've been fighting bursitis for several years now. I refuse to get an mri afraid I might need surgery. Have a great day and I hope you are feeling better.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40598
   Posted 7/15/2008 5:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Dinda,

Welcome to HealingWell fibro forum. I think that you will find that this is a wonderful place to come to. All of the member are so kind and compassionate.

Feel free to read other posts, we have a good informative one called fibro 101 and Who's who in the land of fibrofog to get to know eachother. I am sure that you will feel comfortable here.

Anyways, keep posting and remember we are here for advice and support.

Have a wonderful day
hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Southernlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 844
   Posted 7/15/2008 6:30 AM (GMT -7)   
Karen, I'm so sad that you are having a bad day.  My dh has bursitis and I hear from him how painful it is.  I hope you get to feeling better.  Take it easy today and maybe it will ease down if you just let it heal.  The work will be waiting for you tomorrow. 
 
Dinda, I just wanted to welcome you and tell you that youv'e come to the right place.  I love these pple and they have been my refuge from the storm.  They are all about caring and sharing.  Hope to hear from you again.
 
God Bless!
Shannon
Of all the things that I have lost, I miss my mind the most!!!!


Marlee2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 7/15/2008 7:01 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Dinda and welcome to our fibro family. Read, ask questions and vent when you need to. This is a great group of people.
 
Karen, I'm sorry the pain has gotten so much worse. I hope you have it checked out if it doesn't get better. Why were you trying to do laundry and stuff???
 
I know when we are in a lot of pain we are more emotional but don't dwell on Jay being a little grumpy when he woke up. You should have said, "Geez did you get up on the wrong side of the couch".  If Ken and I dwelled on every time one of us was a little grumpy we would be mad at each other all the time. Can't say I'm the most pleasant person when I get up sometimes. Especially on those mornings when I get up and feel like I haven't gone to bed.
 
Feel better and take better care of yourself.
 
luv and hugs
Marlee
 
 
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
 
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
 
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches and Tramadol
 
Co Q 10, Super B Complex, Extra B12, Multi vitamin


kelly71
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 726
   Posted 7/15/2008 7:23 AM (GMT -7)   
QTK,
 
OK, why do men have to be such A*******? mad   I'm not even in a relationship right now, but I have been there-trust me.  BTW-sorry to all the men in the fibro family.  I'm not trying to man bash-I just understand the frustration.
 
Anyway, I'm so sorry that you have to go through all this pain, and I know it doesn't help when certain people treat you like crap.  If you're like me, sometimes I feel so bad, my emotions are already hanging off the edge, and one little insensitive word can push me over.  So, I really do understand.  In simpler words, I get it.
 
It's weird that mentioned your shoulder pain.  I have that, too, and lately, it's been getting a lot worse.  I just chalked it up to another fibro thing.  I also have burning and numbness in my arms & hands.
 
Alrighty, enough babbling from me (or yakking as you so perfectly called it).  I really hope you feel better, and you know that we are here for you.  From one yakker to another, vent away. tongue

FINALLY dx'd on 06/13/08
Vicodin, Neurontin, Ibuprofen for pain-which doesn't help, BTW
Zoloft & methadone (NOT for pain) for sanity-which doesn't help, BTW
Klonopin for anxiety (Guess what?  Doesn't help!)
 
"I'll take the Chivas instead"
-Kelly Clarkson


QTKaren
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 605
   Posted 7/15/2008 11:41 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanx my good buddies,
 
Awwwwwww I am not mad at Jay anymore,still annoyed,just not mad.  Ya see it's a double standard so many times for women.  Men get all grumpy and snap or say something insensitive and all a guy has to say is "I was only joking" or"I'mm sorryyyyy" and we forgive and forget,but,we do something to make them mad or hurt their feelings and we are in the doghouse for the whole day!!  That's what annoys me most.  I knocked myself out with melatonin and slept extra long(well about 8 hours thats extra long for me) so
trying to wake up here.  My shoulder doesnt hurt quite so much if I dont move it.  Yesterday it was hurting no matter how careful.  Welcome to the forum Dinda and yes a sling does help.  For one thing hanging your arm down yanks on the bad shoulder and trying to just hold it close to you on your own gets tiring and still doesnt take the pressure off the shoulder completely.  Only thing is now the side of my neck hurts where the sling was pulling.
 
And Kelly thanx for siding with me when I was mad lol sometimes ya just want to be validated even if your not acting like a big girl and being the better person.  I think whats bothering aside from hurting all the time is I am afraid.  I have bad and badder days now.  I used to have days when I would have relatively low pain days and I cherished those days but these last few months I feel like I an truly falling apart.  If I could just get a breather inbetween but its one thing after another even when I am being careful.  I am so afraid of losing my mobility and hate having to rely on someone to take care of my basic needs.  Later today I am going to have to have Jay help me shower and its degrading ya know?   And I feel ashamed for taking so much for granted for so long.  I have seen others in wheelchairs or bedridden and thought oh how terrible for them but there was always that little voice in the back of my head that thought at least thats not me that I can handle this or that pain as long as thats not me.  Not that I felt like I was any better person then they were but I have always been so independent,I never realized how independent until recently.
 
And I think even if I end up in a wheelchair how do you escape the pain? It's gotten to the point where Jay has come in and waken me because I am crying in my sleep.  Even if I can stay asleep I dream in pain now.  I have asked Jay to just leave me be that if he wakes me up it doesnt change anything I will just be more aware of it and I am so undermedicaited it's pathetic.  I can't find a so called pain doctor to raise my meds and the drug holidays I take are becoming a waste of time for me.  I am never comfortable.  I get just enough pain relief to keep me mobile.  My doctor said if your doing something that causes you pain then stop so what? stop living? And I am terrified with everything going on with the DEA that I could lose what little bit of pain relief I have and that terrifies me because I absolutely could not cope with that.  And the alternative breaks my heart because I dont think my family would ever fully understand what is is to live in this body.
 
I know just how bad it can be from sharing a medical transport ride with a young man one day.  He was on his way to the University of Washington Medical Center that day as was I.  This kid was in agonizing pain and between trying to breath and crying he told me that he had an inoperable brain tumor and that they were refusing him higher pain meds as they were afraid of him getting addicted.  He was like addicted!!! you got to be kidding me? I am going to die soon.  So I know if they can do that to someone who is dying they can sure do that to someone who has a long time left in this world.  And it's not so much that they dont want to help yu but are too afraid to help you they way they should because of fear of being investigated of having their practice closed down.  How did things get so bad in medical care that the government can step in and not only take away the doctors life but how many of that docotrs patients ended up commiting suicide because they had what little hope they had taken away?
 
I hate living in fear of anything.  Thats why I left my ex hubby.  He had become so violent that I knew if I didnt leave I would die or maybe even him with the thoughts I was entertaining,you can only whip a dog so long before they bite back.  And this old dog was more then ready to try out her choppers ;)  at least I can look back at that with some humor now.  Whats so disheartening is that when I left him and started my "new" life with Jay,even though I had chronic pain at that time,it was managable and I thought it was finally my time to go out and spread my wings and get a job and just live my life without lving in fear anymore but that fear has been replaced with this new fear.  I have lived through bad accidents and domestic abuse and violent crime that almost took my life and pain has turned out to be my greatest fear of all because even thugh those things in my past where horrible they happened and then I could work towards getting past them and moving on but this is so different because they is no running no hiding its there everyday and getting worse.  You know the saying "if these walls could talk?"  If only ppl knew all there was to know about me and things that have happened.  Stress makes pain worse but how can you forget about a lifetime of pain that is locked in your mind? Man I'm complicated sheesh.
 
Well,I have about thunk myself nuts for one day.  Thank you all for being here for me.  It is a comfort to me to know that there are ppl that "get it" and not just the physical pain aspect of it but a womans life(sorry guys but this is one club ya cant be a member of).  I come here and I can take a big breath and let it out instead of holding it all in.
 
Soft Hug's,
Karen
Karen
 
Mom of one gramma to 4
 
Fibromyalgia,IBS,Stroke x2,endometriosis,Diabetes type 2,neuropathic pain,nerve damage due to tailbone removel,nerve damage due to fractured back,deppresion,high blood pressure,severe nausea,atrophy,chronic pain


Marlee2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 7/15/2008 12:41 PM (GMT -7)   
I wasn't implying that you weren't being a big girl Karen. I just know how I can be when I'm really hurting and every little word that sounds the least bit negative can set me off and I say things back that I end up feeling even worse about.
 
You said you had chronic pain when you met Jay so he kinda knew what he was getting into and the fact that he hasn't left you means he really loves you and plans on staying til the end. 
 
I try to put myself in the other person's shoes and I can't imagine how hard it would be to watch someone I love go through so much pain. I don't think we give the men in our lives enough credit sometimes.
 
I know your hurting really bad right now and I hope it goes away soon but try not to project yourself into the future with fibro. My pain level has increased a lot this summer also, not as bad as yours, but I try to take it one day at a time with this DD. We don't know when help will be right around the corner for us, may be even a cure so try to stay positive and don't let your mind wonder to all the bad places. That is not helping you one bit.
 
luv and hugs
Marlee
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
 
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
 
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches and Tramadol
 
Co Q 10, Super B Complex, Extra B12, Multi vitamin


Sherrine
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17101
   Posted 7/15/2008 1:02 PM (GMT -7)   
Karen, I know it's hard to live with pain.  But you are dwelling on it all of the time!  If I did that, I'd be in misery, too.  Thinking about the pain and feeling the pain and thinking about how you are living with the pain has caused such fear and anxiety.  Read the scripture in my signature.  I chose that particular scripture because I thought it would be very useful on a forum such as this.  Just think about it.
 
I have my very worst pain at night.  I start out all right but I have a huge hernia and my doctors want me to sleep on both sides.  I can't sleep on my stomach because of the hernia and I can't sleep on my back because of scoliosis and fibro.  So I start out on one side.  Then I have to carefully roll to the other side.  Words can't explain the pain I feel when I do that.  It takes my breath away and I am moaning.  Then, after a few hours, I have to do that all over again.  Then, I usually have to get up 3-4 times a night.  I barely can stand and I use a cane to get to the bathroom and back.  The pain has grabbed me around the ribcage and I can barely breathe let alone put one foot in front of the other.  But, when on the toilet, I do stretching exercises to help loosen those muscles and I make it back to bed again.  This happens every night for me. 
 
Now, I could dwell on it, get myself upset and make myself hurt even more, OR I could hope that the new day would bring me less pain.  I choose the second choice!  I know I can take this pain for one day and I have hope that tomorrow will be a better day.  This type of thinking keeps the depression at bay and let's Marlee call me Little Miss Sunshine!  tongue   I never look ahead and think, "Is this how my life will be?"  Do you know why?  Because no one knows what the future holds.  Tomorrow we may wake up and, by some miracle, they have found what causes fibro and now have things to help us!  I know doctors are working on it so anything is possible. 
 
So, plan something that  you enjoy each day.  Take time for yourself and try to think of more pleasant things than the pain you are feeling.  If you get busy with an activity the pain can fade in the background. 
 
Sherrine
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
***********************
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7


mamanan
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 846
   Posted 7/15/2008 1:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh my, Karen, I'm so sorry!! Noone should ever be in that much pain. I'm glad you tried the sling though. I really hope that it clears up for you and it's not a pinched nerve. Are they looking into that at all?
in the land of Limbo, taking OTC meds only.
Don't know what's wrong, can't fix it, doctors are so sloooow!!!


QTKaren
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 605
   Posted 7/15/2008 11:38 PM (GMT -7)   
When I made the comment about big girls to Kelly I was joking.  I am sorry if I made it sound like anyone was picking on me.  I did not mean to be a bummer to anyone.  I know that there are others here that are in as much pain or more than me and I was just saying how I felt or what goes through my mind but this isnt everyday.  I do try to think positively and that is what gets me up and out of this house nearly everyday but yes,I do have bad days and sometimes bad weeks where things are overwhelming.  I was pouring out my fears and feelings because I felt comfortable enough to do that here.  I did not want to make anyone feel that this is not a positive site I know that most here are pretty upbeat and I know that ppl put aside their own pain to comfort others and I try to be there for others,maybe not enough lately and I am sorry If I let anyone down by dwelling on my own problems.  I am working on not being so negative,its hard but im not the only person that has had to do it.  I dont know what else to say I understand what you mean and I will work on it harder thats all I can do. 
Karen
 
Mom of one gramma to 4
 
Fibromyalgia,IBS,Stroke x2,endometriosis,Diabetes type 2,neuropathic pain,nerve damage due to tailbone removel,nerve damage due to fractured back,deppresion,high blood pressure,severe nausea,atrophy,chronic pain


Sherrine
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17101
   Posted 7/16/2008 6:25 AM (GMT -7)   
This is good to hear, Karen!  I really care about you and am trying to get you more upbeat.  I know you have a wonderful sense of humor and you can really use that when you are dealing with tough times.
 
I just was trying to remind you to look at the good in your life and not the bad.  Looking at the bad just stresses you. makes the pain worse, and causes depression.  It's important to get focused on other things and not think a lot about how you are feeling or even how others are treating you.  You know you are a good person.  You are always helping someone with something so, if people in your life are insensitive, try to ignore it.  It is their problem.  Just remember what a good person you are and like yourself no matter what anyone says to you.
 
I'm sorry if I came down on you too hard yesterday.  I didn't mean to.  I talk to people here like I would if they were sitting in front of me.  But, they can't see my expressions so sometimes things get lost in the translation.
 
When problems arise, keep looking for the positive.  It's there if we look for it and I think you will feel better doing this.  It helps get  you over the rough spots.  It has helped me so much in my life.  Have a great day!
 
Sherrine 
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
***********************
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7


solar powered
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 538
   Posted 7/16/2008 9:19 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Karen. I hope you are feeling better today. I had bursitis in my right shoulder for a long time which progressed into a severe case of impingement syndrome that did require sugery. Before the surgery the burning pain was in my shoulder, down my arm, into my hand, my armpit, my chest and the whole upper quadrant of my back 24/7- not a good time at all. I had wonderful success with my surgery-it actually felt like a miracle when I woke up in the hospital and all that pain was gone.(the post-op pain was so minimal compared to what I had been experiencing). The scar tissue build-up from the bursitis was so bad the surgeon was even surprised! My suggestion to you is to go see an orthopedic surgeon before it gets awhole lot worse. A cortisone injection or two may help you alot. I was starting to have the same symptoms in my left arm and after about 3 injections I haven't had that pain anymore. He may send you for some pt also or suggest other therapies. Please don't wait on this. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. Lisa

maitland
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2013
Total Posts : 77
   Posted 4/6/2013 1:42 PM (GMT -7)   
you sound really young karen,the ladys are giving you good advice,i am alot older well a young 51yr old lady @ heart,since 2011 i have had widespread pains allover even the eyes and a multiamount of symtoms and that can reach to 30 every 2nd since 2011,i never have a break from it since then,its true how they say it varies from each person,so you can see i have it severe,i had a great working life,family life and a great social life,and good friends,well i thought they were,two have gone,i have one good friend so i am hoping i dont lose her to, i find it really heard to be positive as i recent it so much,i try to be positive but find it so hard,theres just so many things going on inside non stop,i know alot here that have fibro but they havent it non stop so they can do alot more,so you just wish that could be you,im sorry for going on ladys,but everyones condition is totally different and how they cope with it should be respected,not being able to play with my grandson breaks my heart,everything has changed due to this fibro,and something that takes your life away like that so quick is devastating as this pain never leaves me and to accept it and accept your going to be in pain 24/7 for the rest of your life is a very hard thing to do,sorry again ladys for going xox

Post Edited (maitland) : 4/6/2013 2:53:12 PM (GMT-6)


mrsbugzy
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2012
Total Posts : 641
   Posted 4/7/2013 7:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Karen,

WOW, thought there was a mirror there when you were talking! smilewinkgrin
My first hubby was very abusive too..I have a chink missing from one of my vertebrae where he kicked me with a pair of steel toe work boots.. devil He was the devil himself..
Funny enough, after we had been apart for several years (we have 2 kids together), I had a dream..a really nice dream..honestly. We were all in the kitchen (my ex, his wife, me and my hubby) having coffee talking politely and joking around while the kids all played out side.
That was the entire dream, nothing bad, no mean words or anything.. and I was so FREAKED out by the simple dream, that my heart was POUNDING shocked so hard, it woke up my hubby!! He thought I was having a heart attack!! I was on muscle relaxers for a few days from the pain in my chest of my heart pounding..it was awful..all over a stupid dream!!

Well, new hubby, Dave, is not abusive in any where near that manner, he can be so hurtful in what he says..I really chalk it up to his heritage, and his upbringing..he doesn't know how to treat people. sad Add to that he is a construction worker, so it isn't like he has to behave at work smilewinkgrin

It is hurtful when our companions don't support us, but one thing I have to keep reminding myself of, it can't be easy for them either..
So, I try harder on days I feel good, but he know when I hit a wall, leave me alone..no rude comments or anything..or I will break out "my choppers" smilewinkgrin

I really hope you feel better, and am glad to have you here with us..it is a great place to vent and get advice..no big girl panties needed here..lol.. turn

Have a great day!!
celiac disease,
hypothyroidism for 20+ years
total colectomy with ileo rectal anastomosis 1/12
newly diagnosed with fibromyalgia

Doc~ "you don't understand, and ostomy bag is life altering"
Me~ "NO, you don't understand, an ostomy bag is a bag of crap you deal with. Life altering is not being alive to be with my family"

Sherrine
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17101
   Posted 4/7/2013 7:32 AM (GMT -7)   
Mrs. Bugzy and Maitland, this thread is nearly five years old and QtKaren and most of the other members that responded haven't been here in several years. It's so kind of you to try to help her and your posts may help others but I'm locking this thread because of the age of it. We are supposed to do that as mods. But if you want to start another thread like this, feel free to do so! Thanks in advance for understanding.

Sherrine
Forum Moderator/Fibromyalgia

Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Diabetes, Osteoporosis, Glaucoma, Scoliosis, Ankylosing Spondylitis
************************
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7
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