Thank you for responding.
My FM pain began suddenly and took over my entire body. I suppose the worse was the tender spots, legs and arms, lower back and hips. Everywhere, and then it would flare off and on for the first few years and then came and stayed with me. I guess it liked me. LOL
The fog took over and now I can't remember how long I've had the joint pain too. Seems the Lyrica helped the FM and the muscles, but now the joints are flaring.
I feel as if I'm getting worse as time goes by. My legs are by far the worse and now aside from hurting at night they are hurting late in the afternoon. My left groin feels stuck in a cramped position and pain shoots down the thigh of my leg making walking painful. I feel as if I need to carry an oil can around like the tin man in the widzard of oz. Where there is a joint there is pain. A year ago I was not in this condition. I feel as if someone robbed the quality of life from me when I was looking. How can I get worse as time goes on, I don't get it. I'm having a terrible time coping and I'm still not believing this is fibro. How can one hurt so bad all over? I feel sore to the bones. I try and take a hot bath and the cheeks of my buttocks (sorry) hurt. I'm so tender all over and I'm scared. I don't want this. I've excercised all my life, I eat healthy; I dont' want this!!!!!
I'm sorry, I'm just venting. I need to let it out because I'm holding it in and I'm screaming inside. I find it hard to believe that within 12 months I seem to have spiraled down hill. I have a full time job and it scares me that every day tasks may become near impossible on days. I want to find joy again, I want to not hurt, I want the me I used to be back!!!
Is this what fibro is? do you hurt all over and feel as if you are slowly dying? I'm sorry to put it that way and maybe I'm over reacting so please forgive me. If this is fibro then YES I'm grateful its not terminal. Its just the way I hurt I'm scared.
Thank you all for listening and I apologize if I'm coming across harsh. I just needed to let some of this pain out.
((((Kimb)))))) I know exactly how you feel. Few months back I wrote such long entries in my journal describing my life just as you said.
I get tired of others telling me to be thankful it's not cancer and not terminal, but it doesn't take away the fact that I still hurt and grieve the loss of life I once enjoyed. Chronic pain stinks! To have one day without pain or fear that we will not move or be normal again!
I also hold down a job and it takes all I have to get up daily and go. I have gone downhill since my diag 7 years ago. I am not better, I am worse! I don't understand where others say FM can go away or get better???
I"m sorry for all of us who suffer from FM. You are so not alone. Vent all you want. Those of us with FM will ALWAYs listen!
Hi Kaymac and welcome!
Where is the pain? Everywhere. Mostly in my upper back, neck and shoulders.
Kimb- Sorry that your having SO much pain. I got fibro 4 months ago and I thought I was dying the pain was so bad- I thought "you've got to be kidding!??" I would rather have a baby! I am now starting to feel better and realizing life is getting good again- even with fibro. Your body may be telling you that it can't work fulltime. My Dr. let me know that I may never again be able to work full-time. Time is going to tell.
Your not coming across harsh, your coming across as someone in severe pain and frustrated! Vent, vent, vent if you need to. This can get scary! We'll all listen- GamJill
(((((Kaymac))))) thanks for the hug. I can use it.
I know I need to control the pain instead of the pain controlling me; a work in progress. When you are hurting so much it's difficult to see past the pain. I had a good cry driving home today (I know I shouldn't cry at the wheel) only private place other than the bathroom! Accepting that your life is and will be different is not an easy thing to comprehend. I think in the back of my mind I'm waiting for the doctors to tell me what's really wrong so that they can fix it for me. I've not accepted this yet and I know it's making it that much harder for me.How can so many areas of your body hurt at one time? I still find it hard to believe.
I can't handle the thought of not working full time; I do work one day a week from home and that is a life saver for me. My career is a part of who I am. I love picking out clothes to wear, doing make up, listening to music in my car as I drive to work, stopping at the bagel place in the morning for coffee; I love all of this. am I nuts? Recently I got a promotion at my job. I've worked so hard to reach the point that I'm at and it scares me to think I may lose it all. I love being independent. I love working.
Have a good everning all and pain free
"Flare Ups" this is a phrase I need to remind myself of when I'm in pain. I lose sight quickly and drown in "what if". I allow the fear to get hold of me. Trust me, I know fear can rob me of joy. I need strength to fight. The past 2 nights I slep 4 hrs each night (this is actually good). If I can consistently get sleep I will be able to manage this condition better. Thanks for reminding me about "flare ups"; I think this is important to remember. Your right, I can work around it. I think down the road if I had to work more than one day a week home, my boss would let me. One moment at a time is what I keep saying. Just get through the moment. Don't worry about tomorrow until you've had a chance to get through today.
Have a good night and thank you
Wow, so many responses.. Thanks so much for participating.
Some mention joints and muscles. Example, feet, or wrist....I'm experiencing so much joint pain since the lyrica helped the muscle burning...I'm wondering if this is still the FM instead of an arthritis?? I guess my new rheumy will be able to determine that.
Anyway, thanks so much for the answers. As always it helps knowing more about others and how they live with FM.
It took me a long time to accept my state of having fibro. It is like mourning. I had to mourn the person I was before. I will never be that perky puppy personality again, but in a way, I think I am a better person. I take more time for the people around me because I am not chasing my next adventure.
Work has always been a big part of my life. I hurt of course, and still have my flare ups, but with exercise, eating healthy, nutritional supplements, etc. (basically finding what works best for you) You can still work. I work ten hour days. I wrote a book which I promote and speak about and started making wine jelly, which I sell and have two young children. It gets easier. Hang in there. I know it seems overwhelming right now. I remember my first few years. I wondered if I would ever see light at the end of the tunnel. It takes a lot of perseverence. My ex always said I was mean as a snake. Sometimes that stubborness pays off. I will not be an invalid. I will fight!!!!!!!