Exhausted from cats

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RedDiane
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Date Joined Jun 2007
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   Posted 8/12/2008 8:57 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi, I don't have much energy anyway and the last few days I'm going nuts from my cats. We only had one, who spent 7 years with another cat before we got him, then we just got a female kitten, who's adorable. I was going to introduce them slowly, but my two sons, one's girlfriend, my DH and a few other assorted people were at my house over the weekend and decided differently for me. They didn't fight, but the kitten wants to play, and anytime the big cat sees her he wants out of the house, ( He's and indoor and outdoor cat). Trying to keep them separated yet play with both and keep them happy is killing me.

Does anyone have a suggestion how to get the older one to tolerate the kitten? Please help! shakehead Diane
Fibromyalgia since 1984, Sjogren's, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, Auto-immune eczema, GERD, osteoarthritis, IBS, RLS, sleep apnea


Sherrine
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   Posted 8/12/2008 9:54 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi!  I've had cats for 38 years and have gone through some of this.  I had an older cat and ended up adopting two feral cats.  My older cat pouted a lot about it but started to realize the other cats were there for keeps and then he came around.
 
I did get another litter pan and I fed the other cats in a different place.  I didn't make my older cat share his litter or his eating spot.  You don't want to make him think the new kitten is going to take his place.  Give your older cat a lot of extra attention.  Put the kitten in a crate and play and love your older cat.  Then, after a while, take the kitten out of the crate and play with them.  Before you know it, they will start to get along.  Just don't cause competition between them.  Things will be fine!
 
Sherrine
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RedDiane
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Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 906
   Posted 8/12/2008 9:59 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Sherrine, I've done the separate food and litter, but I'll try to give the old boy some extra attention.

Any other great ideas will be appreciated! Diane
Fibromyalgia since 1984, Sjogren's, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, Auto-immune eczema, GERD, osteoarthritis, IBS, RLS, sleep apnea


MT Lady
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Date Joined Jul 2008
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   Posted 8/12/2008 10:21 AM (GMT -7)   

I agree with what Sherrine told you. I have had cats for many years and have spent a lot of time integrating cats with cats, cats with dogs, etc...believe me, cats with cats is much easier than cats with dogs LOL!!

You might want to try just putting them on opposite sides of a closed door, so they can sniff one another. Your older one will probably want to make a point that he's been there longer, is the , well now, I cannot think of the word...talk about a bad fibro flare day for me...well, he is going to want to let the little guy know he's on top. They need time to adjust, to understand each other. Try to be patient, show the older one LOTS of extra attention and love. The crate is a good idea, but a closed door will do just as well, maybe even better, so they don't stare at each other and can sniff without causing too much stress...Remember to reward good behaviour in both!!

We recently adopted a rescue Golden Retriever, from a Golden rescue group. We have a Golden who is 5 and we wanted him to have a sibling, someone to play with. I walk him daily, he is such a good motivator for me to walk, but that simply isn't enough and as all of you understand, there are times that I simply do not have the energy for him and it always makes me feel so bad, him wanting to romp and play and I can barely get off the couch. So we adopted an adult dog, thinking he would have someone to play with all the time. Well...Benji is 6 years old and we couldn't ask for a better, sweeter, more well mannered dog, BUT...he does NOT want to play with Cheyenne, my 5 year old...not sure why. They eat together, sleep together and play NEXT to each other, but won't play together, so now I have TWO I have to entertain...oh boy! We've had him now, actually today, 4 months. I've gotten all kinds of advice, but one woman who's raised dogs for over 30 years told me it can take up to 1.5 years for them to really become comfortable and secure enough to play...oh well...LOL. All we know about Benji, the rescue, is he comes from a home where he lived with an alcoholic man, who really neglected him. His thigh muscles were severely underdeveloped because of lack of exercise, just lying around the house. We don't know if he was abused, but obviously neglected. He freaks out when we try to leave the house, so we think he must have been left alone a lot. Yes, he has "issues" but what a loving boy! Anyway, I sure rambled...sorry... really meant to try to help you and I ended up going on about Benji...be well,

 


MT Lady
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Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 955
   Posted 8/12/2008 10:23 AM (GMT -7)   
the word I was looking for was alpha...that he is the alpha cat...whew, was driving me nuts yeah

getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
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   Posted 8/12/2008 10:59 AM (GMT -7)   
I thought of alpha male, but was going to say top dog. Talk about fibro fog. Whew...

Good luck with your kitties.

Luv and hugs, Karen
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Marlee2
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Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 8/12/2008 1:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Does anyone know of a cat whisperer for Diane??? Sounds like you have been given some good advice. Our house was a zoo when the boys were growing up but the animals got along better than the boys did so I guess I didn't notice it. tongue
 
MT Lady, good for you taking a rescued dog. I have really thought about that but I guess I like the whole baby thing. I have thought about getting two puppies since I don't have the energy I use to have and they could play together but I would become a divorcee, guess I would have more time for the puppies then, hehehe. turn
 
Good luck Diane.
 
luv and hugs
Marlee
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Chartreux
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Date Joined Aug 2006
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   Posted 8/12/2008 1:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Don't you just hate it when family does this to you! My brother's tried to touch my cat max before it was time and they totally scared him, and that scarred him for life, as he never went to any other person except me. Made me so mad. Keep the family away from the kitten and cat till you've got them introduced properly like you want and if they can't follow your rules not to come over till they can...
Sure hope you can get things in control again...
lots of well wishes and soft hugz........
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MT Lady
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Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 955
   Posted 8/12/2008 7:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Yes, Marlee...I know that feeling, wanting the puppies...I have raised four Goldens from 7 to 8 weeks old and they are so much fun, but they are SO high energy!! I just don't think I can do it any more, just can't keep up with them and Goldens are puppies until they are about 4!! Now that I've adopted an adult rescue, I don't know if I'll ever go back to puppies. He came to us completely housebroken...is that great or what??? Absolutely NO accidents...nice not to have to deal with that! Only problem with rescues is having to deal with their "issues" but as I said, he is really a good boy. I sometimes wonder what his life was like, because there are times you can see the sadness in his eyes

Sue2z
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 368
   Posted 8/12/2008 7:58 PM (GMT -7)   
I can only suggest that you make a big fuss off the older when the younger isnt around, if he still keeps it up you may have to lock him in the bedroom for an hour just so you and the smaller cat can have some peice.  Hate to say it but we had a similar prob 15 yrs ago and in the end the older one was full on fighting and stalking we couldnt even leave the house , in the end we had to find one a new home. sad sad
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RedDiane
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Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 906
   Posted 8/13/2008 9:50 AM (GMT -7)   
Sue2z, I'm sorry to hear you had to send one away. I hope it doesn't come to that for me. The older is really hard to spend extra attention on, because he wants to go outside and he never will sit on your lap to be petted. He does like to be brushed, but the last couple of days he won't even stay still for that. Oh, well, I'll KOKO like Jeannie says. cool Diane
Fibromyalgia since 1984, Sjogren's, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, Auto-immune eczema, GERD, osteoarthritis, IBS, RLS, sleep apnea

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