The feelings I go through...any one else?

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SassyIsMyKitty
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 223
   Posted 9/29/2008 9:57 AM (GMT -7)   
I tend to thin a lot, and I love to write, so I wanted to share what I have had in mind this morning...
 
A person full of life, I used to be
Now I am a shadow of my former self
I try to hide the pain I feel
But I am only fooling myself
I try and try to be my old self
But I am now a mere shadow
And I cannot return
For I have an illness that does not retreat
No matter how badly I wish it would
A mere shadow, that is all I am now
I wish I could return the way I used to be
~MDD, Fibromyalgia, OCD, Anxiety Disorders, IBS, TMJ, Arthritis~
 
May your heart be filled with love and joy.
May your mind be clear and true.
May your smiles be many,
And may your tears be few. 
May God wrap you in His arms
Especially when you're feeling blue.


CathyA
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 1431
   Posted 9/29/2008 10:35 AM (GMT -7)   
I absolutely feel that way TikiIsMyKitty,
You've summed it up very well!

MT Lady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 955
   Posted 9/29/2008 10:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Tiki you have read my mind and touched my soul! Thank you for sharing,
Miriam

Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, scoliosis, microdiskectomy C5/C6, bulging disks L3/L4, compressed nerve L5/S1, disc compression L5/S1, IBS, hypothyroidism (now FINALLY well controlled) Also angioplasty, and angiogram, high bp, well controlled, high chol, now normal, well controlled

 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40598
   Posted 9/29/2008 11:58 AM (GMT -7)   
Tiki,

That was wonderful. I must say though, we have lost our old self, now we have to find our new self. I wish that you could write a poem about that. It would be so inspiring. But I loved what you did write.

Best wishes for a wonderful day.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Sue2z
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 368
   Posted 9/29/2008 6:20 PM (GMT -7)   
Not a minute goes by when I dont wish or remember what I used to be I will never adjust to this at all, im no longer the person I use to be and never will be again.            sue2z mad cry
Fibromyalgia, ulcerative colonitus, arthritus, bi-polar
norspan patch, valium, prothiedon, lyrica


mamanan
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 846
   Posted 9/29/2008 8:40 PM (GMT -7)   
I still get angry on the bad days that I can't be my old self. On the good days, I'm happy that I'm starting to se the new self and working with her. Hang in there, you will find the balance. I like your poem.
in the land of Limbo, taking OTC meds (which don't work).  Started at 5mg of amitriptyline.
Waiting for referral to rheumy to get a dx. waiting, waiting, waiting....


chuzzle
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 269
   Posted 9/30/2008 7:09 AM (GMT -7)   

     This is a sadistic disease, the more you give in to it the worse it gets. You have to fight back and maintain a positive attitude. I know it sounds uncaring and insensitive to say get up and get busy when someone is hurting like we do. But if you give this cursed fibro an inch it will take a mile. Don’t give in to the seduction of depression. Don’t let fibro see you sweat…..spit in its face!

     Find something you like to do and do it with all your heart. I have less pain when I do and I don’t notice the pain I do have as much when I am focused on accomplishing something.

     We all have the thoughts you wrote about. The trick is not allowing them to own us. I choose another reality and I won’t settle for anything less...  Please fight back my sister.

 


"For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ." 2 Corinthians 4:6
 
A woman is like a tea bag- you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.
Eleanor Roosevelt


Meggie
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 408
   Posted 9/30/2008 7:30 AM (GMT -7)   

I think because this syndrome is invisible even we have a hard time moving on.  But I look fine, I should be able to continue life as it was  mad   but think of people who suddenly lose a limb or become paralized, they need to adjust and keep living and people understand. There is no going back for any of us, we need to move on and adjust. But yes we are all going to get down somedays, it's hard not to when you feel so bad.  Remember we are all here for each other!!!  When you need a pick me up, come here and get a :-) .

I hope everyone has a good day.

Meggie


SassyIsMyKitty
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 223
   Posted 9/30/2008 11:09 AM (GMT -7)   
I wrote this poem when I was in a particularly depressed, yet insightful, mood. I tend to do some of my best writing when I am in that kind of a mood. I don't know why. I always have. I will try and work on a new poem about finding a way to live with our new selves, and then I will post it. I am glad you all liked this poem. Poetry is usually my best way of expressing myself.

~MDD, Fibromyalgia, OCD, Anxiety Disorders, IBS, TMJ, Arthritis~
 
May your heart be filled with love and joy.
May your mind be clear and true.
May your smiles be many,
And may your tears be few. 
May God wrap you in His arms
Especially when you're feeling blue.

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