I appreciate your sympathies. Things seem pretty hopeless right now. Neither of our cars are running. It is going to cost a lot of money that we don't have to fix either of them. Everything seems like it is falling apart. I just want to get out for a while, try to think. But unless I feel like walking a long way, I can't get out. Part of me wants to get drunk, just to forget about my problems, and I am not the kind of person who does that. I feel trapped...trapped in my illness, trapped with finances, trapped in the house...I just feel so completely trapped.
Nothing seems to be going right. And it is so hard not to fall into a deep depression over it. I want to take a nap, but that still means that I would be in the house. I don't want to be in the house right now. I feel kind of claustrophobic with everything that is going on.
Anyways. Thanks for your sympathies.
The good news is that now we have cars. We were able to get the part we needed for our main car, so it is fixed, which takes a lot of stress away. And I am trying to learn how to take things one chore at a time. My problem is that when I have a good day, I tend to accidentally overdo it. The problem is that I am way behind on chores, which makes things stressful. Once everything is caught up on, it is all a matter of staying on top of it, which isn't nearly as hard. My husband was so sweet yesterday. He did the dishes for me, which is such a big deal because it is so painful for me to them. Because I have to stand up to do them, which kills my back and legs. I know that once things are all caught up on then I will feel better about it, and I will try to stay on top of it so that it doesn't get so bad again.
Thank you all so much for your comfort and advice. I love this forum because people here actually understand exactly how I feel. So I thank you all for that. For all the advice you have every given me, and for simply being here to listen when I need people to talk to.