Question about rheumatologists

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Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 111
   Posted 10/28/2008 1:26 PM (GMT -6)   
I've been seeing my rheumatologist since February when she diagnosed me, but I don't really like her. I want to get a new one but I'm not even sure what they're supposed to do.

My doctor (it's easier to spell than rheumatologist) diagnosed me and then said, essentially "deal with it." She told me that if I needed a wrist brace to write, I should wear it. She told me to take ibuprofen (even though I said it doesn't help) and just do whatever I could. I was a little mystified but went home.

I saw her again in May, I think, or July... either way she just said "well, you haven't changed" and didn't listen to anything I said and sent me home.

When I needed a note from her saying I had a medical reason to withdraw for the semester from college, my mom made an appointment. I told her all the things I can't do anymore and she just said "Try harder." She told me I needed to get exercise even though I said I can barely take a walk. I told her I'm having all these cognitive problems and she just said that I was being negative and I needed meds for depression. She kept saying I was being negative about everything, but I really can't do any of the things she told me to do.

I'm not interested in taking hardcore meds, but she has never suggested anything besides antidepressants that I don't think I need and ibuprofen. I've never told her I didn't want medication. It seems like she should have at least suggested something instead of treating me like a child throwing a tantrum. She made me cry in her office! She also gave me a pamphlet on FM that contradicted things she had told me.

I know that I don't want a doctor like her, but I don't know exactly what a doctor SHOULD do. At the very least I need one whose personality I like.

Oh, and also I don't have a primary right now because my old one told me there was nothing wrong with me and that fibromyalgia is a "trash-bin diagnosis." Otherwise I would ask them for a referral.

What would you guys suggest?

Diagnosed with fibromyalgia February 2008.

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17061
   Posted 10/28/2008 1:47 PM (GMT -6)   
Sandi, check the Yellow Pages and look at doctor's ads.  They sometimes list the illnesses they treat.  Or you can call doctors and flat out ask if they treat patients with fibromyalgia.  I don't care what title the doctor has....they will be useless if they really don't believe that fibromyalgia exists and know you are in a lot of pain.
I use a board certified Internist as my doctor and he is really good and cares, too.  But, his hands are tied somewhat because I'm a lot like you are.  I don't want to take the heavy meds that they want to prescribe.  I am considering Celebrex, though, since it is a lot like ibuprofen and it is supposed to help with pain.
In the Fibro 101 thread there is a link to Doctors Respond to New York Times Article.  Read that and maybe print it out.  It helps prove that there really is an illness called fibromyalgia.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

Green Grove
Veteran Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 2424
   Posted 10/28/2008 10:45 PM (GMT -6)   
Welcome Sandi!!! This is a great place to be to meet new people that are nice and compassionate. . . Sorry you have such a cold doctor. . . I've met a few in my life and wonder what in the world possesed them to go into the healing profession? I guess it takes all kinds to make the world go around. . . Anyway, nice to meet you, and I hope you have better luck with a new doc, and getting to feel a bit better :)
Dream as if you'll live forever. . . Live as if you will die today. . .
James Dean

Regular Member

Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 208
   Posted 10/29/2008 1:03 PM (GMT -6)   
Try to find a pain management dr, they seem to be the most willing to help with fibro.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2006
Total Posts : 1156
   Posted 10/31/2008 1:24 AM (GMT -6)   
The pain management doctors in Washington state are usel
ess. they do not prescribe pain meds. Why they are called pain specialists I do not know.


stitching star
Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 38
   Posted 10/31/2008 9:59 PM (GMT -6)   
I agree that you need a new doc. Those of us with fibro have to be vigilant with our docs that they don't brushus off or ignore our symptoms. There are some indications taht small amounts of antidepressants can help a little. Meds like lyrica also help. Meds to treat symptoms like pain and muscle spasms should be automatic for anyone dx'd with fibro, in my opinion.

I see an amazing rheumatologist. I was told by EVERY pain doc in my STATE that I did not have enough history of problems (only 25 years ALL documented!!!) to be a patient. Then I had to have an epidural steroid shot to qualify for neck surgery and it is only done by a pain doc. The pain doc that saw me actually had the stones to ask why I saw a rheumy instead of him!! His practice was one of the nastiest rejections I have had from a doc.

If you have a regualr doc that you like, ask him or her who they recommend. Ask other people with fibro or similar diseases who they see and who they LIKE. If you are in Oklahoma I can send you the name of an amazing doc. I actually stood in a parking lot with a college friend and we were arguing about who had the better doc - then we found we BOTH see the SAME doc! LOL!!I think my doc is extra understanding b/c he has a chronic disease of his own that is very painful.

Sending hugs, no doc should be that unfeeling as yours.

Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 111
   Posted 11/2/2008 1:05 AM (GMT -6)   
Thanks everyone.

The hardest part is that my mom doesn't understand why I don't like her. She thinks that I don't like her because she isn't telling me "what I want to hear." My mom takes her side, I think because it's easier. It's easier to believe that I'm full of it and if I just try harder I'll be fine than to believe that there's nothing to be done. She's started the same thing she did to me in school. Whenever I called her to take me home from school because I felt sick, she would threaten (!) to take me to the doctor, as if she knew I was lying and if she said that I would admit to it. But I wasn't lying then and I'm not lying now. I want to go to a pain specialist even though she threatens that they'll only get me addicted to narcotic pain relievers (because ONE doctor got my uncle, who is a total idiot independently of this incident, addicted to something so badly that he had to go to rehab).

I just want to shake her and scream "I'M NOT MAKING THIS UP! I'M NOT EXAGGERATING HOW I FEEL!"

She has never EVER believed that I am as sick as I claim to be. She doesn't understand that working harder won't make it better, it'll make it worse. I don't know to explain it to her without her calling me a b****, which is what usually happens when she thinks I'm talking back.


Diagnosed with arachnoid cysts February 2002, fibromyalgia February 2008.

I think I should stop getting diagnostics done in February...

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