I cant stop crying

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leemadd
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 532
   Posted 10/30/2008 9:44 AM (GMT -7)   
Ok i found out about 1 year ago that I have fibro. Ok It did not phase me I have always been the kind of person to keep going. Pain was no problem I was told by Drs to be careful because I have a high pain tollerance that was up until last year. I have had kidney stones and blockages and blew them off until it ended in emergency situations. I clean houses and have had a lot of problems with that lately the pain is horrible. This am I felt good No problems, i drove my kids to school like I always do at 710 am. I came home got a cup of coffee got my hair done ect..  went to leave to go to my house I clean on thursdays and my car would not start dead battery normally I would plug in the charger hook it up and start my car and be on my way. I started crying at 830am and have not stopped. Every emotion in the world has came up. The why me God  why do I have to endure this pain why has this been put on my family Why has this been put on my husband, There are a lot of issues going on right now financially. My $2800.00 taxes are due tomorrow and I dont have the money for them. Just everything hit me at once Did anyone else go through the why me. I feel horrible now my feet legs neck every thing hurts.  My husband has called 4 times and asked if he should come home from work. I normally dont get so emotional could it be the Lyrica. I just started it 3 weeks ago. Any in sight would be helpful
LeeAnn
Lee Ann

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40573
   Posted 10/30/2008 10:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Lee Ann,

I am sorry that you are going through this right now. I understand how you feel.

I also have a high pain tolerance and over do it a lot. We have to learn our limits and go with them. I know it is hard, you are use to being able to do a lot more than you can now. It feels like the rug has been pulled right out from under your feet, doesn't it? It just isn't fair, but who can we complain to? All we can do is try to deal with our new limitations and go on from there. You can do this, it just takes discipline on your part, but it can be done.

I think that everything has come to a head and it is overwhelming for you. You deserve a good cry. It is healthy, I am sure that you have kept everything bottle up inside until now and it was time for it all to come out. So don't feel bad about it, we all go through it. The $2800 in taxes has probably been weighing on your mind without you even realizing it. It has probably been in your subconscious. I know I worry about property taxes, then I realized that I have time to get them paid, I also found out that I could make payments on them. All along I thought that they had to be paid all at once. Of course nobody told me otherwise until just recently. That is a whole another story in itself though.

Keep with us, we are here for you and will listen and give our advice as best as we can. Try to relax, stress only makes the fibro worse. Try not to worry about the things that you haven't got control of at the moment. These problems aren't going anywhere and you will be able to handle them, just have faith.

I hope that you feel better, remember crying really is healthy.

Hugs, Karen....
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Sherrine
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17095
   Posted 10/30/2008 10:59 AM (GMT -7)   
Lee Ann, I think all of us go through the "why me" sadness.  It isn't fair that we have these problems.  We try to go forward but it is so hard and a struggle.  I know I've had good cries over the years.  We hold things in and move forward but, every once in a while, it just builds to a "blowing" point and we will have a huge crying jag.  When you are done, you do feel better and don't feel like you are going to explode.  I do think that's what happened to you this morning.
 
Right now you need to recharge the car battery and yourself!  You know you need to pick the kids up.  That's a must.  But, take some time for yourself this afternoon or evening.  Have a nice soak in the tub and get your strength back after your good cry.  I do think you will be feeling better tomorrow and can face the other problems with a clear head.
 
I hope you feel better now.
 
Sherrine
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
***********************
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7


GamJill
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 1279
   Posted 10/30/2008 11:00 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Lee Ann-

Do you need a tissue??

If we lived close by each other we both could have had our coffee together "crying" this morning. Tough, tough week for me also. And money plays in "big part" in my worries too. Your not alone believe me! It just gets to be TOO much sometimes. I feel that even if we did not have fibro it would be hard- but unfortunately we get physical pain, fibro fog (horrible this week for me) to deal with also. 

I know we are going to be OK, it just does not feel like it at the moment. I know the money worries finally started to wear me down. We will pull out of this and get on with our lives because I don't like feeling this way and I'm sure you feel the same way too.

Hope your afternoon/evening gets a little better and will be here if you need to talk more. I have a prescription for Lyrica but have not started it yet, so can't give you any input on that. Wish I could, but I know others will be along that are on it.

Your in my thoughts- GamJill

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 
 
Fibromyalgia, Depression, Anxiety, TMJ, Arthritis/neck, SAD
 
Zoloft, Tylenol 4000 mg., Darvocet  

Post Edited (GamJill) : 10/30/2008 12:11:30 PM (GMT-6)


leemadd
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 532
   Posted 10/30/2008 11:34 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks everyone for the thoughtful words. I am sure the battery was the straw that broke the camels back. There has been so much going on and I put my smile on and try to be the same old person that I use to be and I need to learn that is not who I am any more.Sherrine fortunatly I do not pick the kids up from school. My son gets a ride from a neighbor and my daughter rides the bus home We are with in walking distance of both middle and high school, They are on a main highway and the kids have to stand on the main highway to get the bus in am but not in pm. so i have no where I have to be except for the 4000 square foot house that i was suppost to clean today I know have to clean tomorrow. I normally do it in 2 days so now it will be a very long day tomorrow.I guess i was long over due for a good cry. I
am going to just pray at this point and time and put all my problems in Gods hands. my husband and I have always been fortunate any time in past when money has been an issue it has always taken care of itself some how. Now I need to get myself togather and get a snack ready for the kids. Im thinking its gonna be some thing chocolate.lol Its mischief night and the kids and I will be up to no good. So I need to rest and prepare for that. Thank you all again for your support,
Lee Ann
Lee Ann

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40573
   Posted 10/30/2008 11:46 AM (GMT -7)   
I am having a good day to the point that it is scarey. I am not use to having such good days and I feel like at some point that something is going to pull the rug right out from under me.

I am doing my best to relax with this wonderful day and make the most of it. The weather is gorgeous and I know that it wont be for much longer, old man winter is sneaking in.

But I am at the point of needing to do my deep breathing just to relax with it. Does anybody else ever go through this? Where things are so good that you can't handle it? very little pain, a fair amount of energy, good weather, no worries atm, enough energy to do the chores that need to be done. What more could I ask for? Wish me luck on enjoying my day.

Hugs, to all of you.

Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Green Grove
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 2424
   Posted 10/30/2008 12:10 PM (GMT -7)   
I sure hope things start looking up and you get feeling better :)  God bless you!!!

Dream as if you'll live forever. . . Live as if you will die today. . .
James Dean
 


RoseCrone
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 71
   Posted 11/1/2008 7:58 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Lee Ann-
A lot of us know the feeling of being overwhelmed to the point of tears. about 2 weeks ago I cried for 5 days on and off. Yes, I have a lot of stress, and was to the point of kicking my husband of 10 years out of the house (which I did a week ago today).
I do blame the Lyrica, which I am weaning myself off of, for part of my emotional mess. I also think it played a role in my life becoming a worse mess, which a lot of medications can do. Lost my grip on priorities, forgot to pay a bill last month, and generally made my fibro fog worse. I was not even on it very long (about 3 months).
BTW, kicking my husband out was NOT the Lyrica, as I have been thinking about a separation for about 9 months. Complicated story, but much of my emotional stress was due to our relationship (I can't blame him entirely - after all, we do choose our response to situations whether we want to accept that or not). I do blame the fibro, in part, as he never understood it and why it changed me. The stress aggravated it even more.
If you can tolerate your level of pain without taking Lyrica my opinion would be to seek your MD's guidance to wean off it. I am not a doctor and am not attempting to give medical advice, just my opinion.
I could not get up everyday and go to work to pay the mortgage on my house without pain medication at this point, and I do take Ultram. Someday I will have built up a tolerance and will probably be searching out another medication. So I am not saying don't take meds, but Lyrica is a very strange one and affects everyone a little differently. I think it's very unpredictable. Even my pain management doc advises against Lyrica but said to try it if I wanted to. Most of his patients eventually stop it.
JMHO, FWIW.
Rose

bridgewitch
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 11/1/2008 9:29 PM (GMT -7)   
For all the fog, fibro does give us some often much needed clarity about our life situations Rose and Sirrenne. We know what we need to change and yet we get stuck in a comfort rut, then wham here comes an invisible monster named fibro and turns everything upside down. We are not the same person anymore and have very little patience with Bulls**t..I have noticed my mental "nice" filter is not always operational..for example, when the gal who has daily baby daddy drama with the fathers of her 2 kids announced she was preggers with another, and another baby daddy was now on the list, Congratulations was not the first word that came out of my mouth..my exact words were dont you know what causes that ? Why on earth did you go off the pill ?..which WAS what I was thinking, but probably not the best thing to say. My point being that we just dont have time to be anyone or anything we are not at the core. In my experience a med like Tylenol may not always be effective at stopping the pain, but the big guns alter too many other things and are just not worth it. So I am trying some alternative methods. (I would love to try accupuncture but it is too expensive and my insurance covers very little..they even asked people to get their drs to re write their prescriptions to cheaper generic meds at WalMart and Walgreens!) I get a crying jag when stuff has piled up on me and I have not dealt with it..usually money related..and no pill on earth can improve how you feel what that is just not there since everything else depends on it. So like Shakespeare said..my advice is..to thine ownself be true and as the night follows the day, thou shalt be false to no man..
Its NOT denial..Its selective reality!


kelly71
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 726
   Posted 11/2/2008 11:19 AM (GMT -7)   
Lee Ann,
 
I don't know if it helps to hear us say that we know what you are going through, but...we know what you are going through. wink   Personally, I totally understand the stress of money issues.  I've gone through a lot of things in my life, but I've never had anxiety like I do now until last year.  I also grew up in a house where showing your emotions was a sign of weakness.
 
From what you said, it sounds like your husband is trying to be supportive (but I could be totally wrong about that).  My advice is to talk to him and tell him how you really feel.  I know it's hard to find people who understand what you are going through, but that's what we are here for.  My family doesn't understand, and instead of trying to understand, they make rude comments.
 
Also, I don't want to sound sterotypical here, but I've noticed that sometimes I get very weepy around that time of month.  Sometimes, you can look at me the wrong way and I'll eith or cry or flip out.  I'm sure that going on birth control would help, but I really don't want to go on another med until I get my fibro under control.  That's just me, anyway.  Everyone deals with things differently.  BTW-I'm also one of those people who cannot allow someone to cry alone in my presence.  LOL-this AM, my mom was coming upstairs from the basement and when she saw me setting the table for brunch, she started to cry.  She said that she's just not used to anyone helping her do anything around the house.  To me, it was just no big deal-how hard is it to put 3 plates and some silverware on the table?  Anyway, my point to this long story is that when she started to tear up, I told her not to start, cause I'll cry, too.  There we were like 2 fools crying over me setting the table! cry
 
OK-I've gotten off the point, again.  Shocker!  It sounds like you are overwhelmed.  Believe it or not, it's really hard for me to ask for help with anything because I'm so used to doing everything myself.  But, I have finally realized that it's OK to ask for help.  And, it's also OK to cry.  So, if you ever need someone to cry with, bring the kleenex and I'll cry with you. wink
 
Hope you feel better! :-)


FINALLY dxd on 06/13/08
Vicodin, Neurontin, Ibuprofen for pain-which doesn't help, BTW
Zoloft & methadone (NOT for pain) for sanity-which doesn't help, BTW
Klonopin for anxiety (Guess what?  Doesn't help!)
Chantix to try to quit smoking (started 08/20/08)
 
"I'll take the Chivas instead"
-Kelly Clarkson

Post Edited (kelly71) : 11/2/2008 3:03:56 PM (GMT-7)


bridgewitch
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 11/2/2008 2:24 PM (GMT -7)   
Kelly (which by the way is my name too..glad I went another way here..the numbers could be really high)..when the dr gave me the dx about my diabetes, it was accompanied by the smoking lecture, and his is quite good what with him being a fanatical anti smoker..anyway, he gave me a RX for Chantix..then when I got the fibro dx, he said I will never say another word to you about smoking. You know the implications but I know your stress level and know that smoking helps with that. He then asked me about the Chantix..I told him I had had it filled then the information came out about it making people suicidal. I told him I had stuck it in my underwear drawer, my fruit of the looms being quite emotionally stable, because I sure did not need any help with depression or wishing things were different. I could not even begin to think about quitting..I had cut back to 5 per day because the place I work wont let you smoke on the property. I went 2 years on 5 per day, got hit with fibro and now leave for a 15 minute lunch every day...not the healthiest move per se, but it keeps me in some control. Then when I leave for the 2nd job I have one on the way there. Since I smoke a name brand, that keeps me in some moderation with the price being what it is. I feel for ya..and admire ya too, cuz I just wont go there.
Its NOT denial..Its selective reality!


kelly71
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 726
   Posted 11/2/2008 3:14 PM (GMT -7)   

bridgewitch,

I know that I speak for most of the smokers (and former smokers) here when I tell you that we know what you are going through.  When my fibro pain hit, I started smoking more.  I was also very stressed out, so I went from about 5 a day, to a pack a day!  My GP had been trying to get me to quit for over 2 years, and one day he suggested Chantix.  I was on a special county program (in CA) and my Rxs were only $5 (and a 30 day supply of Chantix is nearly $150).  So, after reading about the side effects, I decided to try it.  It was like a miracle drug. shocked   I quit smoking in 9 days, and on August 28, 2008, I had my last cigarette.  I'm not saying that I won't stumble and never smoke again, but just knowing that I could stop smoking makes me very proud of myself. yeah

It's weird that you wrote about Chantix, because that county program I am on (and soon willl be off of since I moved), has discontinued Chantix from their formulary of drugs.  So, I couldn't afford $150 and had to stop taking it. sad    I've been off of it 5 days now, and while I do have some extra anxiety, I can't say that it's from not taking the meds.

Anyway, if anyone out there has the opportunity to try this and you are ready to quit (because you do have to be ready), I say go for it.  But, that's just my opinion. smilewinkgrin


FINALLY dxd on 06/13/08
Vicodin, Neurontin, Ibuprofen for pain-which doesn't help, BTW
Zoloft & methadone (NOT for pain) for sanity-which doesn't help, BTW
Klonopin for anxiety (Guess what?  Doesn't help!)
Chantix to try to quit smoking (started 08/20/08)
 
"I'll take the Chivas instead"
-Kelly Clarkson


Pamela Neckpain
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 1821
   Posted 11/2/2008 3:30 PM (GMT -7)   
I will get some Chantix. I chew Niorette Gum AND smoke. Terrible, I know.
I only smoke a few puffs off 5 cigarettes a day, but I have no idea how much
gum I chew. Maybe it's really hurtinge me. I've been chewing it for about 20
years. I feel I cannot quit.
LEE... Feel better, girl. I haven't been crying all day but I haven't gotten dressed.
I haven't really moved much. I'm just so Depressed. Money problems too.
Lots of us seem to have money problems.
I ache ~ my back. I just want to lie down. Maybe I can sleep. It's 2:30 pm.
Pamela (Usually I am on the Chronic Pain Board. I sure like it here also.)
MEDICAL CONDITIONS

Osteoarthritis all levels of spine right down to Coccyx,Spondilytis,Myofascial Pain
Fibromyalgia,Bulging Discs,Spinal Stenosis,Scoliosis,Osteopenia,Chronic Constipation
Carpel Tunel Syndrome, Attention Deficit Disorder,
Depression & Anxiety

Methadone for Pain, Xanax for Anxiety, and more, of course.


Marlee2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 11/2/2008 4:23 PM (GMT -7)   
BW Kelly, we are getting so many Kellys we are going to have nicknames. I thought age was what was making me lose patience with some people, maybe it's a combo of age and fibro. I don't have tolerance for whiny or petty people. If you get pregnant once by accident okay that happens but three...........???
 
Rose I'm sorry about your marriage but if all he was doing was causing you more stress you probably made the right decision.
 
Dealing with fibro and everything that goes with it on a daily bases takes a lot of energy then you throw in bad relationships, money, children, jobs and all of lifes other things and I think we all deserve to have a good cry once in awhile and not feel like wimps for doing so. Dang it this is hard and we have to do it day after day after day. Can you tell I'm hurting more tonight for some reason??? smilewinkgrin
 
I have not tried lyrica and I don't plan on it at this point. My rheumy said my pain is not bad enough to risk the side effects and I was glad cause I didn't want to argue with him over it.
 
Thank goodness we have this forum to come to and dump our problems on. We are always here for each other.
 
luv and hugs
Marlee
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
 
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
 
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches and Tramadol
 
Co Q 10, Super B Complex, Extra B12, Multi vitamin

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