Hey girl...The holidays are stressful for people that don't have fibro. I'm sure that has something to do with how you feel. We fibromites cannot count on anything...like pills that once worked now don't....certain tasks that we could eek through are suddenly impossibe...people that once accepted our pain complaints now roll their eyes...You know what I mean. Christmas, especailly if you have small children that are so excited and wait for this time all year long, can unfortunatley, be a painful, depressing holiday for those of us who are flaring, tired and worn out. What we could once accomplish in three or four days now takes weeks...I got the tree up and it sat without ornaments for almost five days! I wrapped three gifts and had to get out the heating pad.
Don't feel guilty..you can't help how you feel and I'm sure your husband understands and will lend a hand. My husband, who has this flu that is going around AND has shingles along with it had to unload the dishwasher this morning because I couldn't lift my arms high enough to get the dishes in the cupboards. And I took a three hour nap today too!
Be kind to yourself...you'll feel better and those who love you will understand.
mamanan, I am so sorry you are having such a hard time of it. I have found that stress of anykind will do me in. Even something I will be looking forward to will cause enough stress or excitement to put me in bed.
I have been to that place several times, where I think "Wow, I think I am through the worst of it & now can have a life". I have tried to control this illness with a grip of steel, OK as a fibromite that may be overstating it. LOL But I did think it was in my power to make or break it. Everytime I think I have it, then it slams me down to the ground so fast I don't see it coming. I have learned to take each day as I can.
I am glad we have a place to vent & to share the good & the bad of our lives with this illness. I hope things get better for you. I know you want to make things perfect for your kids but whatever you do will be perfect for them. There were many times when my girls were little that I couldn't do what I wanted, what I had in my head. Now that they are adults it isn't those things I fretted & stewed about that they remember with fondness. It is the talking we did or teaching them to cook or playing a game or just being there for them when they were down.
Warm hugs, Denise
I have: Fibromyalgia, CFS, Holt-Oram Syndrome, nasal allergies, depression
Married to a wonderful supportive husband & between us we have 4 children & 7 grandchildren.
Dear mamanan (and everyone else) Have a peaceful, love packed holliday. Why we women and mothers and homemakers, abd caregivers put so much pressure on ourselves, particularly at Christmas, but through-out the year too, I don't understand. My tree has been up for two weeks. It has 1 string of lights, 2 Garlands and eight ornaments. The rest of the ornaments are sitting in a bowl in the middle of our dining room table and I look at that tree, which I went and cut, and drug home and decorated this far, and I smell that fir tree smell and admire the beauty of the plain tree itself. I am quite satisfied if it stays like this until New Years when I take it down. The tree is beautiful so dang hang the ornaments. If someone objects I'll point to the ornaments on the table and say "have at it people" I did my bit. The same with christmas baking, I will make a cake.That's it folks.Anyone elsewant to bake, great. I have a few presents, I need to pick up about three more, nothings wrapped. My Dad, even with Alzheimers, always was a great present wrapper, so I'll be giving that job to him. It's like Occupational Therapy.
When I hear you mamanan, saying your dh is going to get tired of you being ill, and sleeping a lot, kindly picture the scenario in reverse. What if it was he, who was laying in bed, in pain, how would you treat him. Would you get angry at him because he is sick? I think not. Why we twist ourselves into pretzels over the coulda, shoulda, woulda's, I don't know. I call it "going hunting" for trouble. (90%) of what we worry about never comes to pass. The other 10% I recognise as God's plan for us, lessons learned, etc. And always, when I feel lousy, I look around at my beautiful surrondings, my beautiful 1yr. plus puppy who is smarter than all get out, the 2.5 pure white cats living downstairs (they don't care for the dogs), my 12 or 13 year old loyal companion, very large rotty type dog who has lived and travelled with me everywhere, in all sorts of good and bad situations, the roof over my head, and I ask myself, what have I got to be dissatisified with?
There are these days that crop up every once in a while, sometimes they last longer but we only get 1 day at a time so let's no quibble about that, these days which I identify as "days to be gotten through". That's it. I do the absolute least I have to do, make sure everyone is fed and watered, make sure nobody is in worse shape than me, and I just "get through" them. All I have to do, besides the absolute basics, is survive that one day. Nothing to it. I sure hope you start feeling better and if you don't, please be kind and gentle with yourself as you would be with a loved one.
Sorry to hear about your day.... I hope today will be a better day for you!!! Take care!!!