Did the ultimate no no when it comes to a loved one....

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Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 605
   Posted 1/1/2009 1:31 PM (GMT -6)   
I forgot my mothers 77th birthday!!!!  Her birthday is 3 days after x-mas and with us having our x-mas eve party late on the 27th I totally forgot her birthday on the 28th.  I was sitting here typing a post and glanced at the date and felt like the biggest heel in the world.  Now my mom has forgot my birthday several times in her advancing age which is easily forgiven.  So yesterday Lauren(my granddaughter) and I went over to the store and bought her a cake and we each picked out a really nice card(mom likes sparkles)and then got her a dozen roses and not just the cheap store ones we got her the full blown decked out kind.  So I had already bought mom an early birthday gift of a necklace and earring set of lil pearls and crystals. 
Then we walked over there and when she answered the door Lauren handed her the flowers and she seemed confused.  Then Lauren says happy Birthday Granny!!!! and then the light came on in her eyes.  So lauren then presented her with the cake and by that time she was crying and then came the pretty cards and jewelry so she was bawling pretty good by then lol.  She said oh you guys come give me a big hug and we did give her a big hug wrapping my arms around this oh so frail little lady and then I cried.  I told her how sorry I was and she didnt seem concerned at all.  I thought maybe even she had forgotten her own birthday but then she told me about my brother.
Randy had called her at midnight on her birthday.  He had went to bed and something kept bugging him but he didnt know what it was so he goes to sleep and it came to him in his sleep OMGGGGGGGG I forgot moms birthday!! lol so he jumped out of bed and knew she stays up way too late and called her and apoligized.  So it wasnt just me being a rotten child my over the top wonderful son brother screwed up too!!!lol.  She forgave him too of course.  Mom loved her jewelry and said she would wear it on Valentines Day.  I really did feel so horrible about this all.  With my mom getting older I dont know if I am even going to have her for another birthday.  I will never make that mistake again.
Soft Hug's,
Mom of one gramma to 4 lover to One
Fibromyalgia,IBS,Stroke x2,endometriosis,Diabetes type 2,neuropathic pain,nerve damage due to tailbone removel,nerve damage due to fractured back,deppresion,high blood pressure,severe nausea,atrophy,chronic pain,nerve damage due to botched bladder surgery,torn hip joint,hypoglycymic
Norco(double strength vicodin) 80 to 100 mg @ day
Ms Contin(morphine) 45 mg @ day,Lyrica 600mg @ day

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17057
   Posted 1/1/2009 1:42 PM (GMT -6)   
Karen, don't be so hard on yourself.  You said your Mom has forgotten your birthday but you know she is getting older and is forgetful so you forgave her.  Well, you have fibromyalgia along with fibrofog!  You didn't do anything intentionally.  It was a mistake and you made up for it big time!  I think your Mom understands your health more than you give her credit for.  I know she understood.
I did the same thing.  I planned a trip to Ohio to see my two children.  I had the flights, car rental, etc.  about a week before I was to leave I realized that I wasn't going to be home until two days AFTER my Mom's 78th birthday!  She was in a nursing home, to boot!  My brain just wasn't functioning on all cylinders.  My daughters went over on her birthday and celebrated with her and then Mom and I had a celebration the day I got back home.  The sad thing is that she died five weeks later.  I was not with her on her last birthday on earth.  cry
I can't change what happened.  Mom understood...just like your Mom did.  Karen, you are very good to your mother and so was I.  So, be kind to  yourself.  You are only human and you have the wonderful fog.  I hope you have many more birthday's to celebrate together.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40391
   Posted 1/1/2009 3:40 PM (GMT -6)   

I bet that your mom enjoyed the gifts and flowers so much. You are a wonderful daughter.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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