I found what is stronger than fibro.

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   Posted 2/2/2009 1:44 PM (GMT -6)   
It's love. This is rather ironic but 21 months ago when Michael was killed fibro used my weakness and grief to move into my body deeper and stronger than it had been before. Of course I was depressed over losing someone I loved so dearly. But as most of you know the past few months of Ken's ill health has been stressful on me and hopefully everything is fixed now and he will be on the road to recovery. However, I have noticed something since he has not been feeling well and been in the hos three times in the past couple of months and that is my love for my rock, my soul mate, my husband is stronger than fibro.
Fibro didn't stop me from driving the long distance back and forth to the hos even though it made my muscles tight and painful. It didn't stop me from sitting in uncomfortable chairs while waiting for hours even though it would make my back hurt and I couldn't find a comfy position to sit in. Fibro didn't stop me from walking the long distance from the parking garage to his room which seemed like a quarter mile everytime I walked it even when the arches of my feet would hurt and my leg muscles would get sore. Fibro didn't stop me from getting up to check on him every few minutes when he came home to make sure he wasn't bleeding from the artery they went in while he slept even though I was tired myself. Fibro nor his friend arthritis hasn't stopped me from doing the grocery shopping for my man so he would have the food he wanted to eat even though my hands would ache from picking up stuff three different times and pushing a cart that felt like it weighed a ton all over the store. Fibro really tried to bring me down with feeling like my body had beaten all over and I didn't think I could take another step but it lost to love.
I have also found that without Ken to take up the slack around here I can do more than I thought I could, not that I'm anywhere near to what I would like to be able to do. The arthritis in my hands are always going to be a big issue. I have also realized my love for Krissy has made me move a lot more than I was before we got her.
So the secret here is you have to love those around you enough to weaken fibro. Now I know what keeps the young mothers on here going way past the point of fatigue.
luv and hugs
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   Posted 2/2/2009 1:57 PM (GMT -6)   
This is an excellent post, Marlee, and it's soooo true!  For me, my love of life keeps fibro at bay, since my hubby isn't with me anymore.  My life, my children, and my friends keep me going and enjoying the life that I have.  Yes, love does conquer fibro...hands down!
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God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

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Date Joined Dec 2008
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   Posted 2/2/2009 2:02 PM (GMT -6)   
((Marlee))  That was a very powerful post, bravo!Love is a very powerful force and without it,I'd have really gave up along time ago.As bad as this thing brings us down,the fighting spirit still marches on,and thats the love of self or self-preservation.You grit your teeth 50 times a day,looking for one more push just to do the dishes.Sometimes I wonder if this is a test from the Big One upstairs,or just Karma I've reaped,I really didn't think I was that bad! cry
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Pamela Neckpain
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   Posted 2/2/2009 2:48 PM (GMT -6)   

What a post! My husband has had serious health problems in the past
two months. He's my love, my rock, my best friend ... all that and more.
During the times that he was ill, I could do almost anything. After the
crisis I'd go back to more the me I know - the one that carries a #7-8
pain around all day and night.

When we house moved, I did all sorts of things I didn't think I could do. (I didn't
want him to over work.) I amazed myself.

Yes, I agree, Love is stronger than Fibro (Or whatever it is that I have that
causes all this pain)

You said this message in a way that would not irritate anyone. Some
people don't have Love. I wish they did. Sometimes I don't think about
it or appreciate it but love is the force in my life that has carried me
through seven years of intractible pain. I want to be as well as possible
in case he gets sick and needs me.

Your husband is a lucky man and you are a strong woman.


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Irish Babe
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   Posted 2/2/2009 2:57 PM (GMT -6)   

Well said, Marlee! When someone we love needs us, we find the strength to take care of them. Just as they find the strength to care for us. I have always found that when either my DH or I am 'down', sick, etc., the other one finds the strength to do what needs to be done. When you are married to your favorite person in the whole world, you do everything in your power to help them.

Love is more powerful that any evil, including Fibro!.

God bless.  Alice.

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 478
   Posted 2/2/2009 5:23 PM (GMT -6)   
Oh Marlee I really needed to read that post. We can do things in the name of love, fibro doesn't have a chance.

You know how you said you are doing more than you thought you could with Ken not chipping in? Well I have found the busier I stay the more the pain recedes. Don't get me wrong I'm not talking marathon stuff just keeping my mind distracted. WE have to be really strong mentally to fight this thing. It is for sure that you are!!!

Ken is a very lucky man and you are so fortunate to understand what you have and be so thankful. He has probably helped you more than you could ever know.

Thanks, Patsie

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   Posted 2/2/2009 6:52 PM (GMT -6)   
((Marlee))... that was beautiful.

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   Posted 2/2/2009 7:13 PM (GMT -6)   

Beautifully and simply said, Marlee....and a wonderful reminder of the real power in the world.  Thanks.


diagnoses:  mono 1972; postviral CFS 1997; fibro 1998;  UCTD (dx limbo) 2007
meds: Plaquenil 400 mg, occasional low dose xanax for sleep aid, artificial tears w/ ointment at night, Advil/aspirin prn

getting by
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   Posted 2/2/2009 9:06 PM (GMT -6)   
Awesome post Marlee,
What you are saying is so true.  We seem to have that energy hidden in reserve for when we want to be there for our loved ones. 
You are a strong woman and Ken is so fortunate to have you there for him.  I am so happy that your love is overcoming the fibro pain and fatigue for you.  I am sure you will continue to be strong.
Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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   Posted 2/2/2009 9:38 PM (GMT -6)   
Marlee, that was so beautiful!  I know just how you feel, but could never put it in words like you did.  I know the words spilled out directly from your heart.
When my dh had triple by-pass I stayed at the hospital with him for over a week.  They even fixed me a room near by, but I couldn't see him except a few minutes every 4 hours.  I came home only one time during that week.  At that time I didn't know I had fibro, but I sure had the aches and pains and was so exhausted I could hardly walk up the hall to see him, but that love pushed me onward.
You are so right and so much in love.  Ken is a very lucky man to have a woman like you to love him. 
God Bless!
Of all the things that I have lost, I miss my mind the most!!!!

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   Posted 2/2/2009 10:59 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks for that Marlee. Now I know why I could do so much for my daughter when she was paralyzed after little Erin came along, stairs and dishes and laundry... Things I could barely do at home. Love does push us to do more and makes the pain bearable.
~ Jeannie, Forum Moderator/Diabetes & Fibromyalgia
I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much. ~Mother Teresa

"People are like stained glass windows: They sparkle and shine when the sun's out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is light within."- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

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   Posted 2/3/2009 12:15 AM (GMT -6)   
Beautifully written Marlee. Thank you for posting.

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   Posted 2/3/2009 12:26 AM (GMT -6)   


What a wonderful post & so true. I've never really stopped and thought about it, but as I read your words it made me remember times that I was there for my family and didn't let Fibro get in my way.

Thanks for the reminder that we still have the strength when we need it! You are an awesome person and I bet Ken knows it too!

Love & Hugs!!    Margie

Never regret something that made you smile!

Fibromyalgia*Osteoarthritis Of Spine*Sleep Apnea*RLS * Depression*Chronic Fatigue*Allergy/Sinus*Menopause

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   Posted 2/3/2009 12:43 AM (GMT -6)   

Your love came through it all, my sweet friend, and your feelings could not have been worded better. I would love to add that to our stickies for others to read, especially when they are new and frightened. When times are tough if we can turn our attention to those we love and just keep doing what we must do, we seem to be rewarded by reduced or ignored pain. It's the least an Angel deserved, Marlee. This is right up there with The Spoon Theory!

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   Posted 2/3/2009 7:59 AM (GMT -6)   

thank you so much for posting this. it is so true and you said it so well! it's amazing what we can actually accomplish when we're doing it out of love for someone else-i know it's love that gets me out of bed at 6:30 every morning to get my kids up and ready for school and it's my love for them and my husband that keeps me going throughout the day!
love and hugs

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We either make ourselves happy or miserable. The amount of work is the same.~Carlos Castaneda

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   Posted 2/3/2009 9:11 AM (GMT -6)   


I am so happy for you!!!  You have had an awakening! :-)    Inspitational, thanks for posting this..we all need a reminder sometimes, when we feel like our illnesses define us.


Big Hug



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Some people dream of angels, I held one in my arms

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   Posted 2/3/2009 9:20 AM (GMT -6)   
I'm glad you all liked it. I was having one of those rare mental clarity moments yesterday. smilewinkgrin I'm sure we have all heard stories where people have done unbelievable things to save a loved one, like parents running back in a burning house to save their child, it's love that drives them to do that.
Yes Jeannie, that is why you were able to do what you did for all those months. You were afraid MC may never walk again and the power of maternal love took over. Same reason you opened your home to their family when they lost their home.
Shannon I'm glad they made you comfortable at least.
I guess for those that don't have a family to take care of they need to get a pet to be responsible for.
luv and hugs
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   Posted 2/3/2009 9:41 AM (GMT -6)   
Oh the power of love! I SO agree!
Enjoyed your post Marlee, you could not have said it better-
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   Posted 2/3/2009 12:40 PM (GMT -6)   
Marlee, You are absolutely right. And said it so beautifully. Now, I realize how I've been able to go on with this for 24 years. Love ya. Diane
Fibromyalgia since 1984, Sjogren's, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, Auto-immune eczema, GERD, osteoarthritis, IBS, RLS, sleep apnea

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