Completely O/T. but need your advice

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Tootiebug58
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 378
   Posted 2/10/2009 2:41 PM (GMT -7)   
My daughter in law is 6 weeks pregnant.  She started spotting a brownish discharge yesterday.  The dr told her to go home right away and rest.
She has had a previous miscarriage.  She was scheduled to see the dr today to take a blood test to see if her HCG levels dropped.  She sounded horrible last night and was scared to death.  She called me this morning and she said
" i am too busy to see the dr, and the spotting isnt that bad anymore."
I almost fell over.  Am I over re-acting?  I know its been years since I have been pregnant, but shouldnt this spotting be investigated.  She did the same thing last time, and 5 days later she miscarried.  Sorry, I know its off the topic, but I needed to ask.
Thanks all
 
Sue
Tootie
-------------------------------------------
anxiety/panic attacks...osteoporosis....Fibro
 xanax


pattipanda
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 1014
   Posted 2/10/2009 3:34 PM (GMT -7)   

WOW, Sue!!! You'd think she'd be more concerned espeically since she's had a misscarriage before.  I don't think you're over reacting at all, I'd be very upset if I were you.  And it worries me that she's "too busy" to go to the doctor.  But it's her call, I hope she/you aren't dissappointed by her decission. 

Let us know how she's doing, you'll be in my thoughts.

Warm hugs,


Patti
 
Fibormyalgia, 4x Lyme Disease Survivor, Depression, Anxiety Disorder, Dyslexia, 2 Lumbar Disk Herniations, Allergies, Bi-lateral Carpal Tunnel. 
Meds = Elavil, Tramadol, Lipitor
"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land among the stars" - author unknown


Irish Babe
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Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 1371
   Posted 2/10/2009 4:08 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi, Sue. I'm so sorry to hear she is having this prob and not going to the dr. Thirty yrs ago this month, I was 8 wks along. I had a lot of stress going on, my father was dying. I started to bleed on the ride home from visiting him 100 miles away @ the hospital. I had an appt scheduled the next morning. My dr. told me to go home and rest, DO NOT GO to work. I stayed home. The end of that wk, I ended up losing our baby. We were devastated. I almost died in the hospital. I was pregnant 2 more times, both times I had bleeding. I went to the dr and he kept a very close eye on me thru the 2 pregnancies.

After I lost my baby, I almost decided not to even try again. It took me some time to calm down, think it thru. I was willing to try again, my DH said he was behind me whatever the decision.

I was so scared each time, but I let my dr know w/ all my concerns. He said 'Call me, this way we are both in the loop'. I couldn't imagine just ignoring this. I fully understand your feelings. You and your family are in my prayers.

God bless.  Alice.

 


Dagger
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Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 1522
   Posted 2/10/2009 7:25 PM (GMT -7)   
I don't think there is much that could be done if she is miscarrying this early.

Spotting, especially brown, can happen during early pregnancy. Brown spotting that is brief is usually not much to worry about. She should still be checked out though.

You can lose a lot of blood and still maintain a pregnancy. I was 19 weeks along when I found out I was pregnant with my first. I had normal cycles during the first half of my pregnancy and was only two weeks late (or so I thought).

During the later half of my second pregnancy, I would get up 2 -3 mornings a week to run to the bathroom with a bath towel between my legs. It would be covered with blood by the time I got there. I used a large bath towel, it ended up soaked. They never determined why this happened. He was fine but arrived 3 weeks early.

Marlee2
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Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 2/11/2009 10:19 AM (GMT -7)   
Tootie maybe she is afraid to find out after already losing one baby. I lost a baby at about 6 wks between my oldest and middle son and that is how it started was a thick brown discharge. I hope that is not the case with her. Can you talk to your son and get his help in getting her to the doc to be checked??? I know it would put your mind at ease if you knew everything is okay. I so hope it has stopped and the baby is fine.
 
luv and hugs
Marlee
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
 
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getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
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   Posted 2/11/2009 10:54 AM (GMT -7)   
Tootie,

I just wanted to say that I hope everything is okay. I would also be concerned that she isn't going to the doctor, but as somebody already said, it is her call. But you can try to persuade her. I hope that she goes.

You and your daughter are in my thoughts and prayers.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


kelly71
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Date Joined Jun 2008
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   Posted 2/11/2009 11:02 AM (GMT -7)   
Tootie,

I have never had a baby, but if I was having this problem, I would 100% absolutely go to the doctor and get that blood test. This is just my opinion, but since she's had a previous miscarriage, she should be extra careful with this pregnancy. Children are a gift. :-)
FINALLY dxd with fibro on 06/13/08
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SleepyBug
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Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1097
   Posted 2/11/2009 11:27 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Tootie,

I am very very fortunate to have never had a spotting issue with any of my pregnancies, but one of my dear friends had multiple miscarriages and she was on the phone with her Dr. immediately whenever she saw spotting. I would think that your daughter in law would want to be in touch with her Dr. asap about this, but like Marlee said maybe she just can't face the thought of losing this baby.

I am thinking of you and praying that everything is fine now. Please let us know how you and your dil are when you get a chance.

{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}
love and hugs
~danielle


fibromyalgia, ibs, gerd, anxiety

We either make ourselves happy or miserable. The amount of work is the same.~Carlos Castaneda

I wish you all the joy that you can wish.~William Shakespeare

Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.~Erma Bombeck


Tootiebug58
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 378
   Posted 2/11/2009 1:14 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks for all your posts. She refuses to go to the Dr. This baby was not planned as they have only been married 6 months. The first miscarriage was when they were not married. She is back to work and said she will see the Dr on Feb 17th, her normally scheduled appt. She wont listen to my son.
I called her last night and she said the brown discharge has stopped, but this is the way it was during her first miscarriage, and five days later, she started bleeding heavily and lost the baby. What makes me so mad is that she is still smoking and the dr warned her that smoking causes miscarriages and she is at a higher risk since she had one already. I know its hard to stop,
I was a former smoker, but the day I found out I was pregnant, I stopped immediately. My son said she is NOT happy being pregnant, SO SAD!!! That is my grandchild and my sons baby. She was only off the pill for a month and she got pregnant. I truly think she has some emotional problems, and
wont face them. My son said she is never happy and they are having a lot of problems. I pray to God she isnt doing anything on purpose to cause a miscarriage. My instincts are not good. But time will tell. Thanks to all of you for your posts. Will keep you updated

Sue
Tootie
-------------------------------------------
anxiety/panic attacks...osteoporosis....Fibro
 xanax


pattipanda
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 1014
   Posted 2/11/2009 2:01 PM (GMT -7)   
~~~ SIGH ~~~ Oh Sue, I'm sorry you have to go through all of this.  My step-daughter had a misscarriage, just last week.  Her reaction was much the same.  It wasn't planned and she and the dad aren't married.  But it made my heart sink and I had simalar instints.
I REALLLLLY understand.
Warm hugs,
Patti
 
Fibormyalgia, 4x Lyme Disease Survivor, Depression, Anxiety Disorder, Dyslexia, 2 Lumbar Disk Herniations, Allergies, Bi-lateral Carpal Tunnel. 
Meds = Elavil, Tramadol, Lipitor
"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land among the stars" - author unknown


Tootiebug58
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 378
   Posted 2/11/2009 3:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Patti.....thank you. My son just called and informed me she is spotting again and still will not go to the dr or ER. I truly believe she wants to miscarry.
My heart is breaking. That would be two grandbabies I could of had. I just dont know what to think. I would like to call her, but my son asked me not to. I think of that little "bean" growing in her, and tears run down my cheeks.
No wonder my fibro has been flaring, but thats ok. I can deal with this pain, but the pain of losing another grandbaby hurts more. Thanks all.
Will just keep praying and praying.

Sue
Tootie
-------------------------------------------
anxiety/panic attacks...osteoporosis....Fibro
 xanax


pattipanda
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 1014
   Posted 2/11/2009 4:12 PM (GMT -7)   

I know the feeling.. the hurting inside makes you hurt on the outside.  I'll keep good thoughts going for you dear, Sue.  Again, I'm so sorry for the pain its putting you through.

Wish I could be there to hold your hand.

Warm hugs,


Patti
 
Fibormyalgia, 4x Lyme Disease Survivor, Depression, Anxiety Disorder, Dyslexia, 2 Lumbar Disk Herniations, Allergies, Bi-lateral Carpal Tunnel. 
Meds = Elavil, Tramadol, Lipitor
"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land among the stars" - author unknown


Tootiebug58
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 378
   Posted 2/11/2009 4:26 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Patti, I am sorry for your loss also. It does hurt, doesnt it. Will keep you in my prayers hon.

Sue
Tootie
-------------------------------------------
anxiety/panic attacks...osteoporosis....Fibro
 xanax

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