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LilMissSunshine
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 40
   Posted 2/17/2009 8:50 PM (GMT -7)   
i'm sorry i haven't been very active but i've been coming home from work and absolutely crashing!

i was also offended by the martyr post and mulled over what my place was in all of that.... i realize i was hasty in judging what that woman had to say. so many times in my life i have expressed my emotions in the same way and the point i was trying to make was lost in the emotions that carried it. i should have looked deeper into the words she said. i'm sorry for that... we are after all a family.

i have been working for a month now... four weeks of 8-5.... four weeks of staying til 6:30 on fridays.... four weeks of adjusting my schedule over and over to make sure i can get up the next day. i stand by my initial optimism, mainly because i knew then that the joy and gladness over working would somedays turn into bitterness and pure exhaustion. (i've since had those days)

i've come so far since my last post and i'd really like to share with everyone. i now have my first appt with a rheumatologist on march 23! i did this all myself! when i quit school(because of fibro) i lost my insurance under my parents as a student. so i've been without for many months but i am proud to say i receivec my very own insurance cards in the mail yesterday and i am now COVERED! i am also going to my very first fibro support group meeting on thursday! i have been talking with the lady who leads it (she is the one who recommended the rheumy) and she has been so helpful with giving me tips she has learned over the years! i told her what a great help all of yall have been!

i had a flare from hell on sunday and monday.... fortunately i was off work on monday and could rest! but it seems like lately i'm just barely keeping my head above water. i use all my energy to go to work... some days when i get off work, calling a friend and holding the phone to my ear seems like too much.... my arms are in pain and the weight is too much.

i am nervous about the rheumy.... i still worry that they will say NO you don't have fibro.... and i get thrown back into the place i was for so long of wondering why i felt the way i did and nothing but a crazy head to blame.
i am worried that one day i'll sleep through work because my body says ENOUGH and wont let me wake up.
i am scared that one day i'll wake up a realize, this is never going away is it? because for now, i'm only doing day by day.
i am thankful that through everything, all the trials i've gone through that i've learned who i am .... and how many 20 yr olds can really say that?

anyways.... i can't wait to tell everyone about that dr visit!

julieleaps
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 257
   Posted 2/17/2009 10:37 PM (GMT -7)   
It sounds like you are working really hard to overcome your pain and fatigue - good for you! Just be sure to pamper yourself, too, when you have the time.

You are a brave young lady, with a great attitude.

Be sure to let us know about your doctor's visit.

-Julie
Still learning how to manage my Fibromylagia, and all the lovely gifts it brings.   
I had severe spinal stenosis, had fusion done on C5-7, and my life has changed. 
 
 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40595
   Posted 2/18/2009 4:50 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi LilMissSunshine,

You are right about going day to day with fibromyalgia. That is all we can do really. Taking life one day at a time really gives us time to enjoy it. We try not to dwell on the past or worry about the future.

Recognizing this disorder, dealing with it and accepting it, is so hard. We go through so many different stages of a psychological and physical adjustment that it is overwhelming. But like you said, you have us to help you through it. You will grieve when you come to terms with it, if you haven't aready. It is hard. But one day at a time my friend. With our help, you can do it.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Marlee2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 2/18/2009 11:14 AM (GMT -7)   
Your right, fibro has made you face things that most 20 yr olds don't have a clue about and it is sad that you have to deal with this DD everyday of your life. But who knows when they are going to find a cause and cure for fibro, don't give up that hope. They are testing new meds all the time and that is a positive thing. There has been many medical mysteries solved over the years and fibro will be too.
 
You have a lot to be proud of yourself for. You are giving this job your all and that is all anyone can expect of you.
 
If this doc was recommended by a head of a fibro group I'm sure you will get a dx. Hopefully, you will get put on something to help with the pain which may be adding to the fatigue. Remember it's all trial and error with meds and what may help some may not be the one for you. Have you thought about trying the malic acid/magnesium that helps some on here???
 
luv and hugs
Marlee
 
 
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
 
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
 
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches and Tramadol
 
Co Q 10, Super B Complex, Extra B12, Multi vitamin

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