I'm upset. No, more like furious, actually.
My family doctor has been prescribing my pain medications for the last few months-- since I've started using them. I have always used them as prescribed and have never had a problem getting another prescription when I needed one in the past. But now, suddenly, they're treating me completely differently.
When I was nearly out of medication last week, I stopped by the office for another prescription, and one of the receptionists told me I had to wait another two weeks. I was devastated, but I didn't want to say anything or cause a scene. I don't need to be accused of "drug seeking behavior".
So, I figured I would try getting by on just my other meds. I figured it would be wonderful if I could actually function half decently without the use of narcotic pain medicine. I really don't want to be completely dependent on it; it worries me. Unfortunately, after 24 hours without anything for pain, I was a complete mess, lying on the couch crying because the pain was so bad I could hardly move. I went on like this for two more days, before finally deciding to go to the emergency room.
I couldn't believe how they treated me when I got there. The doctor was "nice" on the surface, but constantly insinuated that I was a drug abuser. I was so hurt and offended. Even my parents, who had come along with me, weren't pleased with the way I was treated. Then, a nurse came in, jammed an injection of dilaudid into one of the really tender muscles in my arm (I wanted to scream at her). Finally, without even asking if I felt any better (I didn't) they shoved some discharge papers into my hand (including a prescription for a three day supply of percocet) and told me to leave and follow up with my family doctor or rheumotologist.
So, I've stretched that three day supply out to five days now, and I only have two pills left. I have to work later today (which is always like torture for my body) and I have to spend all weekend packing up and moving. I just don't know how I can possibly do it all with no pain relief.
I called my rheumotologist, and she started me on Lyrica, which I am thankful for, and hope that it works. Unfortunately, it takes at least seven days to start working... so what do I do in the meanwhile?
I called my family doctor's office again today and explained the situation to them. They still told me no medication until Monday. I have no PRN for pain now. I am not allowed to even use any OTC anti-inflammatory with the diflunisal I take twice a day (not that any OTCs work anyway).
I feel like everyone just thinks I'm seeking drugs to abuse. I'm so emotionally hurt. I feel like I've done something wrong. I don't want to have to rely on narcotics. I wish I never had to take one again. But right now, they are the only thing that takes any of this pain away. I am hoping and praying that the Lyrica works so I can get out of this horrible situation.
Waiting until Monday feels like an eternity when I'm in this much pain. And now all I'll do is worry about how I'm going to get through work and through the weekend. Of course, worrying makes everything worse. But that's this little thing called anxiety that no one will treat me for. (I guess they must figure I would abuse those medications too)
I wonder if it's just because I'm young that I'm being treated this way. Sorry for complaining. I am just so offended and so miserable I want to scream at the top of my lungs.
Monday, please come soon!
23 years old
Diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in April 2009 ~ Suffering since 2008
Diagnosed with Depression & Anxiety in 2007 ~ Suffering since childhood
Diflusinal, Nortryptiline, Celexa, Flexeril & Percocet as needed
starting Lyrica today (4/23) hoping it helps!!!!
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." -Robert Frost
Be not afraid of going slowly, be afraid only of standing still.
One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure its worth watching.