Hurting, every one of us is in pain with this illness. We didn't ask for it but we do try to make the best of a bad situation. I personally think that your anger and depression over this is causing you more extreme pain. And, because you have said that you had problems before, narcotics are not the answer, unless your doctor feels that you can handle them.
I do care a lot about you and what I'm going to say is what I would say if you were my child. I'm a no-nonsense type of person so keep that in mind. If I were you, I'd try to get the depression under control and the anger out. Then you can face fibro head on. You need to try different things to see what works best for you. If you are looking to be pain-free, I don't think that will happen. It hasn't happened for me and I've had it for over 22 years now.
Some people might get irritated at me because they think I don't have fibro as bad as they do, but, trust me, I do have plenty of pain. I just don't usually talk about it and I don't dwell on it either. I dread nighttime. I don't sleep and am up 4-6 times a night, I am moaning when trying to move even a little in bed, I'm very stiff when getting up in the morning and I hurt to breathe most of the time. This is when I'm NOT in a flare. If I get in a flare, I barely can walk or get out of a chair but I absolutely refuse to allow this illness to steal my life away. I only take ibuprofen with food and extra strength Tylenol to take the edge off the pain. I use malic acid/magnesium supplements and vitamin D supplements and they have helped a lot with the pain, too. I do have Vicodin in my medicine cabinet for break-through pain but I have never taken one.
I know that if I stretch and keep moving, the pain will ease some and I won't hurt as much. If you sit or lay too much, the pain will be worse upon getting up. That's why most of us are so sore and stiff in the morning. When I'm on the computer, I get up and walk around about every 20 minutes or so. I walk for exercise and I couldn't walk far at first but I built myself up and now am enjoying morning walks with my dog. There have been times when I've been in a flare that I'm limping badly and wondering why I'm walking the dog, but I continue and am usually a little better by the time I get home. If not, I'm at least proud of my accomplishment. I do realize that I will have bad days and I will have good days. I anticipate each new day as being a good day. If it isn't, that's alright. I can make it through the day because tomorrow could be a good day. You have to take each day at a time. But, I think you get up planning on being miserable and that's exactly what happens.
You need to start living and enjoying life. You need to stop thinking about the pain you are in and just try to do some fun things. Try the stretches and try doing some gentle exercises. That will help with depression, too. Look at the good things in your life. I know you have some...everyone does. Try to put your focus on things other than fibro. Your negative thinking is only causing you more stress which is causing more depression which is causing more pain. You are in a vicious cycle right now and you need assistance to stop it. An antidepressant that will work for you is a good start. Making some plans with friends or watching a funny movie that will make you laugh will help. I know you are probably shaking your head wondering what this crazy lady is telling you, but all of these things help a little and, when you bundle them together, they help a lot!
I want to see you enjoy your life instead of hating it. I have done many, many things in my life that I never thought I could do with fibro. But, I never gave up and I've always given things a try. Or, I find ways of working around fibro in order to do the things I really want to do. If you plan ahead and pace yourself, you can have a good life in spite of this illness.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7
Post Edited (Sherrine) : 4/26/2009 9:56:03 AM (GMT-6)