Not the answer I wanted to hear.

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crazyoldcatlady
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 194
   Posted 6/17/2009 4:20 PM (GMT -7)   
I asked my doctor today about the possibility of going on disability.  His response...
 
"In my opinion, it would not be the the best interest for you or anyone to be on disability for Fibromyalgia. The treatment for this includes continuing to be active and do things, including working even if reduced hours."
 
Who would hire me when I walk into an interview like a zombie?  How am I going to find work that I can do?  I'm really discouraged lately by all my non-working parts, and this response didn't help.  shakehead   I'm not as "unable" as some of you.  I do okay sometimes.  I guess maybe the idea of getting on disability was just an attempt at validation.  Now I'm back to feeling like I'm just lazy, or a diva that wants everything handed to me, or using my physical issues as a ploy to get attention, or whatever. 
 
Just really discouraged now. cry
 
Donna


poodles
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 180
   Posted 6/17/2009 4:26 PM (GMT -7)   
Aww Donna. I'm sorry he made you feel worse.

As for me, I am a diva! Just having me around lends respectability and purpose to everyone else's life. Right??? yeah
Vickie

Fibromyalgia, Bipolar II, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Anxiety, Arthritis, High Blood Pressure, etc.


myjoy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 686
   Posted 6/17/2009 4:28 PM (GMT -7)   
Sorry this happened to you. That doctor was way out of line.
DX fibromyalgia 2007, osteoarthritis, obsessive-compulsive disorder OCD, depression, anxiety, sleep apnea, hysterectomy.

fluoxetine (prozac), buspar, abilify, trazodone, lorazapam, nexium, nabumetone, hydrocodone, c-pap machine, estrodial patch.


Heather H.
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 756
   Posted 6/17/2009 6:22 PM (GMT -7)   
I get where your coming from. My only difference was that my doctor left it up to me. Then he got sick and closed his practice. Now I am pretty much trying to get all this together on my own. I have to start over with a whole new neuro and all new testing.
It sucks when you feel like your just a diva and just lazy. My hubby tells me that on a constant basis. I am a diva, lazy and I expect everything to be handed to me on a silver platter. It's not true and he says it only when we have been fighting.

He made me talk to a lawyer and to the local SSI office. Then I filed anyway. I now have a lawyer and am waiting for a court date. Don't give that doctor the power to make you feel bad about yourself. You do what's best for you and everyone else can take a flying leap.

Heather
Love many, trust few, always paddle your own canoe!
 
dx's:  Fibro, 8th cranial nerve inflamation, MS.
 
meds.:  none at this time
 
 


Dagger
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 1522
   Posted 6/17/2009 6:36 PM (GMT -7)   
I agree with your doctor to a point. I believe that staying active is important and once you stop needing to be active (work) you start losing ground. Staying active keeps me active.

But I also said "to a point"!!!!! Some people just can't work and expecting them to work is crazy. People need money and medical care and disability may be the best way to meet these needs. Fibro affects all of us differently. Just because I can currently work doesn't mean you can or even that I will be able to work in the future.

Shash13
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 179
   Posted 6/17/2009 9:25 PM (GMT -7)   
Donna -- that doctor needs to spend a day, no, just an hour would do, in our shoes........Yes, we need to stay active as far as our conditions will allow us to, but work is a whole 'nother ballgame. I've been on disability for a long time now, and though I hate not being able to work, I know this is what I have to do. I'm grateful that it is there when we need it, although there was a time when I felt lazy, etc., too. Sometimes I still do, but it is usually when I've had the unkind or downright hateful comments that we all get from those who have no conception of what we deal with.
We are all different, and our tolerances and needs may vary widely. That doesn't mean that one of us is better or more valid than another. I wish I, too, could do more -- but, like you, I've learned the hard way that limitations just sometimes have to be accepted and worked with. We're still valuable in our own individual ways!
We care about you, and there are many soft hugs coming your way, starting with this one from me........
Luv ya
Shash
Dx: FMS,OA,depression,anxiety,DDD with 7 herniations so far,HTN,IBS,cardiac
stent,failing aortic valve,angina,migraines with aura,many surgeries,+misc.
Rx: Nifedipine,Atenolol,Enalapril,Simvastatin,Levothyroxine,Cymbalta,Bupropion,
Dicyclomine,Lorazepam,Darvocet,Percocet,albuteral inhaler,nitroglycerin,+
( novice with computer - patience, please!)


donnaeil
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2006
Total Posts : 1156
   Posted 6/17/2009 11:21 PM (GMT -7)   
Your doctor is a pompous jerk.

Donnaeil

luckyguy
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 6/18/2009 1:13 AM (GMT -7)   
I remember going to a Rhuemy with my sister, and she brought up the idea of possibly needing to go on disability in the future. He remarked that his patients that continued to work did considerably better and lead a healthier life. End of discussion for the day. After we walked out, I asked my sister if she thought it ever occured to the doctor that his patients that were on disibility were there because they were SICKER than his other patients?

bsjaguar
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 974
   Posted 6/18/2009 3:16 AM (GMT -7)   
I gave up a good paying full time job cause I just couldn't do it anymore. Started another job part time 33 hrs per week and it was still more than I could do. It's not fair to expect us to work part time with very few hours and not make the money we are accustomed to. Isn't disability there if you are unable to work 8 hr days 5 days per week. I can do alot of things but not on a continuous basis.

bsjaguar
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 974
   Posted 6/18/2009 3:31 AM (GMT -7)   
It's not fair though to ask someone to take a part time, lower paying job because they can't work full time anymore.  I have plenty of credit hours and could make good money on ssdi.  I can still do some things but not on a continuous 8hrs a day 5 days per week.

bsjaguar
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 974
   Posted 6/18/2009 4:00 AM (GMT -7)   
oops sorry for double reply.  I'm still kinda new here and learning the ropes. 

tyno3
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 1081
   Posted 6/18/2009 4:36 AM (GMT -7)   
This pompous attitude your doctor has is what makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. I run into it all the time. I went from a job earning 25.00 per hour to cleaning houses, because I couldn't take the mental stress of working in my chosen field (Social Work). Then I couldn't clean houses anymore b/c my body was so beaten and bruised at the end of the day, I couldn't eat, couldn't cook, couldn't walk upstairs to my bed. I just sat in a chair downstairs like a zombie wondering when I was going to get kicked out for non-payment of rent. Then I tried working at a bottle exchange, a nasty re-cycling depot where usually prisoners on work release , work. I was fired after 3 days b/c I couldn't do it. Then I ended up sleeping in a pup tent under a tree in the park. So, fibromyalgia does or doesn't cripple. "Judgement is mine sayeth the lord." Currently, I am housed and almost fed by Provincial Disability. My meds cost $65.00 a month, that is the co-pay. That leaves about 150.00 to eat, buy gas, pay for repairs, etc. It never works. I have been selling off my possessions to survive. I am applying for CPP, the equivalent of SSI, in Canada. I understand it can take up to three years. So, as for the non believers, may they come back as Fibromites.

tyno3
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 1081
   Posted 6/18/2009 4:38 AM (GMT -7)   
ps; if he thinks you need to be more active, tell him to give you some adderal, so at least you can get through the day.
Hypothyroidism, Fibromyalgia, Facet Joint Syndrome, High Blood Pressure, menopause, Migraines, Chest Pain, Anxiety and Depression/BiPolar II
Synthyroid .075mg., estradiol.5 mgs., Amyltriptilene, 100mgs, bedtime, Tylenol 3 PRN (six-eight, daily), Valium 7.5mgs. daily prn. Flexeril, prn (not so helpful), Zoloft,150mgs., Zomig approx. 12 per month, prn., Meds for High Blood Pressure, vary.


bsjaguar
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 974
   Posted 6/18/2009 6:25 AM (GMT -7)   
I know where your coming from Tyno.  I worked in a factory all my life and am not qualified for any job that doesn't require continuous physical movement.  My past employers got their money's worth out of me but now my body is shot.  I have a family history of arthritis and degenerative disc disease also.  I have an appointment tomorrow with a new PM doctor.  Hopefully he can help me out.  Good Luck to you!!

lost in philly
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 243
   Posted 6/18/2009 7:11 AM (GMT -7)   
Ive had doctors say the same sort of thing to me about being active (I think in part b/c I am so young). I make a point of telling them that since I have been home on work disability, I have been filling my days with water therapy, yoga, walking the dog etc. but that after wards I am shot for the day. Plus she has been taking my weight and I have been losing not gaining. So I explain that I do what I can, but it destroys me for the rest of the day. They need some things spelled out to them!
lost in philly

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fibromyalgia, Endometriosis, Migraines, Asthma, Chronic Fatigue

Savella, Topamax, Morphine, Percocet, Wellbutrin, Abilify, Crestor, Resoril, Loestrin, Imitrex

B12, Magnesium, Melatonin, Omega3
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Knowing without doing is like plowing without sowing."


crazyoldcatlady
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 194
   Posted 6/18/2009 7:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Wow thank you all so much for your replies, and for sharing your stories. Up until this point I always liked this doctor. He's been really good about, well, everything else. I really didn't expect the brush off from him on this. I was stunned.

I have worked all of my life with pain. Besides the fibro stuff, I've dealt with chronic back pain, gallstones, years of severe migraines, years of horribly painful Endometriosis, etc. etc., and NEVER missed a day of work due to pain. I've been unemployed for 6 months. I had hoped that after a break, I'd be doing better, but it hasn't worked that way. It's not the pain stopping me from looking for work. It's this
!@#$% FATIGUE that I can't deal with. The memory/recall issues, the inability to focus... That's what makes me unable to work. I wouldn't hire me!

Well I guess it's time for my pity party to end. Thanks again for your supportive responses. I love you guys!
Donna


SleepyBug
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1097
   Posted 6/18/2009 7:46 AM (GMT -7)   
Hmmm..this is a quality of life thing, I think. Yes, being even moderately active is very important for Fibro patients, but I can't say I agree with the idea that working is the ideal way to stay active. Working even part time can take away all of our spoons, which means we have none left over for the things we really want to do in life! So..although the Dr. is right in that yes, working part time isn't totally out of the question physically, in a way it is totally out of the question. Why should we as fibromites lose out on all of life's pleasures just so we can keep pushing ourselves to work? Granted, there are those of us who can work without it meaning they can never do anything else and I give them a HUGE round of applause!!! But what about those of us who have to make a choice between work and the rest of life? I absolutely do not think that disability should be brushed off because working part time will help keep us active. And I don't think that a person with fibro or any other chronic illness should be forced to choose between taking care of ourselves physically and taking care of ourselves financially. What an awful choice to have to make! Not to mention the fact that we, as U.S. Citizens, have been paying into disability insurance since our first jobs, so why do they have to make it so hard for us to get our money back?? That's really all we're asking for, isn't it?

Ok...that's my little rant for today. lol

If I were you, I would definitely seek a second opinion on this one. That just seems like a very dismissive attitude for this Dr. to have...let HIM get fibro and then see how he feels about the matter!!
love and hugs
~danielle


fibromyalgia, ibs, gerd, anxiety

We either make ourselves happy or miserable. The amount of work is the same.~Carlos Castaneda

I wish you all the joy that you can wish.~William Shakespeare

Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.~Erma Bombeck

Post Edited (SleepyBug) : 6/18/2009 8:49:20 AM (GMT-6)


Marlee2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 6/18/2009 10:53 AM (GMT -7)   
If we only had evil powers to use on these people!!!!  devil He is right, we do need to stay active, but to our ability and that varies with each one of us. I don't know how old you are Donna but when I asked my doc about it he agreed that there is no way I could work but I will be 59 next month and I also have other health problems besides fibro.
 
Hmmm, so if he thinks you can work he must not be taking your level of pain and energy seriously either. Find a new doc.
 
luv and hugs
Marlee
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
 
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
 
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches and Tramadol
 
Co Q 10, Super B Complex, Extra B12, Multi vitamin

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