It's been a day....

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

SassyMyKitty
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 673
   Posted 4/12/2010 7:41 PM (GMT -7)   
Today has not been the best of days for me. I found out earlier this evening that it would appear that my husband has been stealing money from my grandma. He has been paying our phone bill using her account for at least a year now, without her knowledge. I am at a loss of what to do. He denies it and yet all the evidence points to him. I just don't know what to do. I am not pretending I have never done anything wrong, but this is like a HUGE deal. I really don't know what to do about any of this. I could use some encouragement and advice.
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Dr. Seuss
 


TressiaN
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 52
   Posted 4/12/2010 8:02 PM (GMT -7)   
Sassy,

bless your heart, that is a hard problem to have to deal with. The first thing you need to do is fix your grandmothers account so that your hubby can't get access to the money any longer. As far as how you deal with your husband that would be a tough decision for me too. I would have a hard time ever being able to trust someone that would steal from an elderly person (especialy your own grandmother). I know you can't ignore what you think he has done because the stealing will get worst if you do. You just need to figure out how to show him that you are not going to tolerate or ignore what he has done. I think i know what i would do, but this has to be your decision. Good luck dealing with this & let us know how things turn out, we are here for you.

Tressia
 Diagnosed with -FM, Degenerative disc disease, spinal stenosis, arthritis, Lupus., undifferentiated connective tissue disease. 
Medications- Plaquanil, 800 Ibuprofen, Lortab, Cymbalta 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40567
   Posted 4/12/2010 8:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Sassy,

I am truly sorry for what has happened. I hope that you and your husband can work this out to where you can trust him again. This would be devastating to me too.

I am at a loss for words, because like you said, this is huge. But I have faith that you will get to the bottom of everything. Again, I am so sorry this has happened.

Know that we are all here for you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


SassyMyKitty
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 673
   Posted 4/13/2010 4:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks so much for the encouragement. When I woke up this morning, I was praying that it was all just a really bad dream, but I know that it wasn't. The thing is that I have stolen before. I'm not pretending I am perfect. But I have never ever done anything like this. One of the biggest problems is that he is denying it left and right even though all the evidence is right there. My grandma is going to press charges, I think. Today she is going to call the phone company and let them know that I was not involved in any way. I just don't know what to do. I can't trust him. And I hate confrontations. I hate them with a passion. I just don't know how to deal with this. I feel so lost. I appreciate that I can come here and get advice and support and wonderful words of encouragement. This is so hard on me. Yesterday when I found all of this out, I was physically ill. I thought I might vomit on more than one occasion. My mind was racing and my hands were shaking. This is all just really stressing me out. I don't need this. And I just feel so terrible for my grandma. She has helped us out so much and now we find out that my husband has been stealing money from her. I called the phone company to see if maybe it was accidentally on auto pay. Because she has voluntarily payed the bill for us a few times in the past, but it wasn't. It had to be done manually each month. I wish I could just take my baby Alex and go on vacation. I need to get away from all of this and try to figure out what to do.
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Dr. Seuss
 


damouthy1
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2009
Total Posts : 663
   Posted 4/13/2010 6:38 AM (GMT -7)   
I am sorry you are having to deal with this on top of everything else. I hope things get better for you soon. I wish I had some great advise for you but I honestly don't know what I would do if I was in your situation. Just know that we are all here for you!
Gentle Hugs,
Shannon
 
Fibromyalgia, Chronic daily headaches, Migraine disorder (with and without aura), GERD, High blood pressure, Depression and Anxiety
Oxycontin, Percocet for bt/pain, Flexeril as needed, Lopressor, Lexapro, Famotidine, and Promethazine as needed for nausea from migraines


confused Okie
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 164
   Posted 4/13/2010 9:33 AM (GMT -7)   
If it was done in the past, some companies just ask would you like to pay using this acct and gives you the last 4 digits. Is it possible that is was a mistake and he honestly did not realize it was her acct? I have paid my daughters and it has my acct #'s listed as options, had to warn her to make sure what acct # she is checking when paying. I know that is probably a long shot, but with my brainfog I could see myself doing something stupid like this. I honestly do not look at my accts closely and have noticed some charges that I can't place when i do look more closely. I was even enrolled in some magazine monthly thing and didn't notice for almost a year. It is a tough situation, I would make him do everything in his power to make restiitution for his actions quickly, whether intentional or not.
If you think you can, you can. If you think you can't, you won't.
I may not do things like other people, but I get things done in my own way, in my own time.


Acheybody
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 5929
   Posted 4/13/2010 12:26 PM (GMT -7)   
I don't know what I'd do, either. Confrontations are so painful when it's someone you love!! I wish you all the best.
Debbie
 
  Diagnosed: Fibromyalgia, Meniere's, mild liver damage (why?), keloid scar tissue (from burn) on back, arthritis, lumbar disc damage, IBS, migraine
  Meds: Nortriptyline, Clonazepam, Darvocet as needed
multivitamins, l-lysine, probiotics, magnesium, malic acid, calcium + vit. D, vit. C
  Chiropractic adjustments


SassyMyKitty
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 673
   Posted 4/13/2010 1:10 PM (GMT -7)   
I am probably going to talk to him sometime soon, when Alex isn't here. I'm going to talk to him about what's been going on, and if it comes down to it, I am going to tell him that I want a separation. If he would tell me the truth, that would help. It wouldn't change what has been done, but it would be better if he would just come clean. He doesn't seem to realize the severity of this situation. He's acting like nothing is wrong and that nothing is going to happen. But he's wrong about that. I don't want to confront him alone, but I don't know who to ask to be a mediator. Maybe his dad's friend. If it is anyone in my family, then he is going to feel threatened. I am just so conflicted. I mean, I have done plenty of wrong things in my life. Some of them recent. But this is a huge deal. And he is acting like nothing is going on. I HATE this! I need a vacation. sad
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Dr. Seuss
 


TressiaN
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 52
   Posted 4/13/2010 4:24 PM (GMT -7)   
Maybe you need to step back get yourself together first. Go to a friends house or just get out by yourself to calm down. I think your grandmother should press charges and that might decide what will happen to him. It sounds like confronting him will do no good if he is denying it. Have your grandmother press charges and they will get to the truth. I'm so sorry you are having to go through this alone. Making yourself sick about it will only hurt you (remember you did nothing wrong) even if it was your husband. Let the officials get to the bottom of it and then you can decide what you need to do at that point. Good luck & hang in there

Tressia
 Diagnosed with -FM, Degenerative disc disease, spinal stenosis, arthritis, Lupus., undifferentiated connective tissue disease. 
Medications- Plaquanil, 800 Ibuprofen, Lortab, Cymbalta 

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Friday, December 02, 2016 5:36 PM (GMT -7)
There are a total of 2,731,855 posts in 300,973 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 151131 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, veris.
289 Guest(s), 8 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
Krimpet 🍔, YinYanger, Helgramite, Michael_T, Xmaslover, Girlie, London Lurker, julymorning


Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook  Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter  Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
Advertisement
Advertisement

©1996-2016 HealingWell.com LLC  All rights reserved.

Advertise | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer