You know the saying......

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KellieJo
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 382
   Posted 7/24/2010 4:30 PM (GMT -7)   
You give them your heart then they turn around and stomp on it.  I love it when the kids where younger as they become teenagers they can become quite nasty creatures. 
 
I still love them very much but can't wait till they outgrow this phase, where in the heck did they get this self-centerness???? 
 
Found out this week my 18 year had gages in his ears, then found out he was trying to sell them to the 14 year old.  I told him when your 40 your really gonna hate those big holes in your ears.  He lives in our house so they all went into the trash.
 
Then my 14 year is so bitter and have not a clue to why except I homeschool them.  She is not to happy about that but I don't want to loose her too the world.  Her friend from 7th grade (she attended school that year) is expecting at 14.   Then she wonders why I wouldn't let her hang around with her.  She doesn't make the best choices with friends that has always been an issue with her.  She can be full of drama, I think she will make one heck of an actress.
 
Why wasn't there any parent warnings manual with this job.. smhair
 
Tell me my sweet children will return one day.

TheChickenPrincess
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2010
Total Posts : 554
   Posted 7/24/2010 4:37 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh KellieJo, don't you have enough stress already? :( I'm so sorry you're having frustration with the teenagers. *sigh* I'll send some good wishes and vibes out for you all.

I hate to ask, but what are gages? Are they those stud things? (I'm not into decorating the body with permanent anything!)

KellieJo
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 382
   Posted 7/24/2010 4:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Lol, we thought we would be the type of parents that catches on to that kind of stuff, well we weren't until many months later. It seems my 14 year old and niece knew but forget to inform us, the parents.

They are earings that you keep getting bigger with, eventually like those rainforest people with the big see through holes in their ear lobes, yeah that's gonna make a good impression on the boss when he gets older.

vestabula
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 2855
   Posted 7/24/2010 4:59 PM (GMT -7)   

The 'when he gets older thing' is soooo true.  I was standing behind a young man in Wendy's who had tattoed both of his entire ears black, inside and out and had lightning bolts going down his back and both arms.  Future IBM executive.  It is very difficult being a parent these days...sounds like you are doing a good job.

My 6 year old grand daughter just went to a Taylor Swift concert...at six years old her father was playing with Legos and watching Mr. Rodgers.

Donna

Donna, I changed IMB to IBM.  Didn't think you would mind  LOL

Sherrine


Post Edited By Moderator (Sherrine) : 7/25/2010 9:06:09 AM (GMT-6)


puppylover
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 821
   Posted 7/24/2010 5:30 PM (GMT -7)   
No one gives we parents as much joy----and then sometimes as much pain---- as our own children. Been there, done that. And this too will pass.
Puppylover
 
Fibromyalgia, arthritis in spine and hips, IBS, Raynaud's syndrome, hypertension
 
On the eighth day God created Golden Retrievers.


MsBunky
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 1097
   Posted 7/24/2010 5:39 PM (GMT -7)   
Ah, the teen years!!! I learned very quickly that not everything needs to be a battle. There were a lot of things I didn't like that my kids did but as long as they weren't doing anything illegal, or that would hurt someone physically or emotionally, I usually just left it alone. I decided to pick my battles - there were things regarding drinking, drugs and/or sex that were absolutely forbidden and other stuff I would let slide.

For each situation, I'd ask myself "is this the hill you want to die on in battle?". A lot of the time, I realized my "no" had no substance and was simply said automatically, without really listening or hearing the child. It's a never ending thing - my kids are in their late 20's now, but it worked for us.

Good luck,

Pam
Conditions: Fibromyalgia, Severe Myofascial Pain, Chronic Pelvic Pain (with permanent muscle damage), Femoroacetabular Impingement (CAM and Pincer), Reynauds, IBS, Surgical Adhesions, Ophthalmic Migraines, Severe Hot Flashes (both Surgical Menopause and medication related), plus physically unable to vomit due to the Nissen, and I have extremely tiny veins with a lot of scar tissue...a joy when it comes to having to give blood or get an IV started

Surgeries: Appendix, Uterus, Nissen Fundoplication for GERD, Left Ovary, Gallbladder, Right Ovary, TVT

Medications: Oxycontin, Cesamet, Tramacet, Cymbalta, Flexeril and Clonidine plus Laxaday, Vitamin D and a Multi-Vitamin daily


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40581
   Posted 7/24/2010 5:43 PM (GMT -7)   
The joys of parenting!lol... I do feel for you though. It is just that stage, as was posted above, this too shall pass.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


MinnyMouse
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2010
Total Posts : 197
   Posted 7/24/2010 6:35 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh boy do I remember those days, I too like Pam decided to pick my battles too. My oldest ended up (after she left home) with the tatoos and my youngers (while at home) did everythign she could to do exactly opposite everything I would want. Yes the gages, piercings, tatoo's and her pick of friends were the worst. She came home one day at 17 and told me she wanted to get married. That day I had to make the choice of my life, support her and hope for the best or don't and possibly lose her forever. So the papers were signed and she married at 17. I can't talk, I did too. Well, last week I answered the phone and it was my precious baby in tears. She was so upset and it took me a little bit to even figure it out. She called to say "I'm so sorry mom" I was not the daughter I should have been, I want you to know I love you and please forgive me for all I put you through. What a call, she's happy in her marriage and he's an awesome son-on-law, One choice she made in her life that going on three years of marriage now, I'm very happy with. My baby girl grew up. We are talking almost daily and she resembles the little girl in pig tales I remember so well. Now for my oldest, not quite as grown up, but she's happy and healthy.. Raise them right, all you can do is what you believe to be the best... in time they will come back.
Diagnosis:  Fibremyalgia, Chronic Myofacial Pain, Degenerative Disc Disease, Degenerative Joint Disease, Connective Tissue Disease, Lupus, Osteoarthritis, Anemia, Issues caused by being severely double jointed. Vitamine D Difficency.
  
Meds:  Vicadin, Meloxicam,Omepraxole(high dose previced) Vitamin D 50K , Ambian, Savella,Lyrica, Tramadol, Cyclobenzopine, Voltaren Gel, and Pennsaid Drops.
 

"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy paths acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths." Proverbs 3:5,6

 
 
 


Ntish
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2010
Total Posts : 36
   Posted 7/24/2010 7:12 PM (GMT -7)   
MinnyMouse said...
Oh boy do I remember those days, I too like Pam decided to pick my battles too. My oldest ended up (after she left home) with the tatoos and my youngers (while at home) did everythign she could to do exactly opposite everything I would want. Yes the gages, piercings, tatoo's and her pick of friends were the worst. She came home one day at 17 and told me she wanted to get married. That day I had to make the choice of my life, support her and hope for the best or don't and possibly lose her forever. So the papers were signed and she married at 17. I can't talk, I did too. Well, last week I answered the phone and it was my precious baby in tears. She was so upset and it took me a little bit to even figure it out. She called to say "I'm so sorry mom" I was not the daughter I should have been, I want you to know I love you and please forgive me for all I put you through. What a call, she's happy in her marriage and he's an awesome son-on-law, One choice she made in her life that going on three years of marriage now, I'm very happy with. My baby girl grew up. We are talking almost daily and she resembles the little girl in pig tales I remember so well. Now for my oldest, not quite as grown up, but she's happy and healthy.. Raise them right, all you can do is what you believe to be the best... in time they will come back.
 
 
OMG!  I can't believe I am crying!  This is so true!  Like a few of you said, pick your battles.  They will come back.
 
 


crazykitty
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 4796
   Posted 7/24/2010 7:53 PM (GMT -7)   
Reading these posts make me think of how quick the years go by!
Enjoy all of them. The teen years are challenging, but in the end, kids do
grow up.
 
My Little Girl
 
My little girl is a woman now
with an agenda of her own
 
All grown up, she's married now
with a child and her own home
 
I stand back sigh and wonder
Where did our time go?
 
But in my heart, I know
My little girl is a woman now
with an agenda of her own
 
Robin
 

Statgeek
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 1495
   Posted 7/24/2010 8:19 PM (GMT -7)   
OMGosh, Teenagers are hard!!!!! But it will pass. My youngest said last year that I was her best friend. It was so funny because a bunch of family members were here. Everyone stopped what they were doing, leaned forward and looked at her quizzically and looked at me with raised eyebrows, then all sat back quietly saying nothing. I was just as shocked as they were. We have had some enormous battles during her life. They do come around. But beware, if they move back home after moving out, they tend to revert back a little. An 84 year old woman actually told me the other day, "I am going to boss my son." Then she went to him and said, "you need to change clothes, it is almost time for the dinner." What a crackup. He had to be nearly 60! He was quite gracious to her. Parent child relationships can be confusing, and teen years are the worse. I tried to instill in my kids the ability to disagree with me and be their own persons while still being respectful. That is a very thin and difficult line to walk - we didn't do it perfectly.
Good luck!!
Sue

kathydownunder
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 447
   Posted 7/25/2010 10:55 AM (GMT -7)   
I suvived 4 teenages well 2 who tried everything you name it they did it. The other two where every parents dream. But as they told me they learnt from their brothers mistakes.
There was something I learnt very early on with them. I just told them how wonderful I though their body art was, when and what where they going to do next. I loved their body piecing what where they going to get done next.
I discoved with my oldest once mom loved something and took a intrest, the thrill of getting on mom's nerves was no fun when she agreed with what they where doing. Now our oldest is almost thirty he uses the same thing with his ten year daughter.
And well the old "I hate you" well when I told them "Great thst mans I am doing a good job" The I hate you's stopped after a while why say it to your parents when they where pleased. In fact I have told a few of my frinds about thst and they now use it. Works like a charm.
My 19 year old DD tells her friends about that and laughs now. As she says mom being pleased took the whole sting out of the words.
teenages don't you just love them. Hopefully I taught my wonderful children how to cope with their children when they get to that age or I will be a wonderful Grandmother and do what I do best and show them I am unshockable with what they do.

Kathy
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