Don't mean to whine, but.....

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Luvzminis
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Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 2568
   Posted 8/31/2010 4:43 AM (GMT -7)   
Am feeling a little down today.  This may sound silly, but most of the rest of my family is going to the State Fair to see a show ("Weird Al"), and yes, I bought a ticket months ago when I THOUGHT I could go.  Now I find out I would be sitting about 3 hours, my MP is just around the corner (and tends to be heavy at times), I would be sitting separate from my husband, as the seating arrangement goes (13 tickets total for family/friends so they're divided), and I would have to walk a LONG ways just to go to the bathroom...as if I could find my way back afterwards.  Plus, I would have to sit in the car about an hour just to get to the Fair, which makes for one stiff woman, and I think the noise level of the music, as well as being surrounded by thousands of people, would send me over the edge.  What was I thinking buying a ticket???  I asked my son to give it to one of his friends, so that's taken care of.  But, you know, I'm kind of bummed.  My husband thinks I should have gone and I would have been fine, but I've had flares lately, and I know better.  I thought maybe I could still go and find a happy medium--maybe stay for only part of the show, but there doesn't seem to be one, and there's no way I'd wander around alone at the State Fair.  SIGH--yeah, there are bigger things in life, but just kind of disappointed, you know?  This is a rare "bigger" outing with the family, but I honestly can't find a way to make it work. Thanks for letting me vent.

getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40592
   Posted 8/31/2010 5:17 AM (GMT -7)   
I am sorry that you didn't go to the fair. When I am in a situation like that, I often go back to the car to lay down. But try not to miss anything that has to tdo with the grandkids. They want grandma there so badly. So I make the effort. But don't feel bad. It could have been a miserable day. Maybe next time you can try. It does no good to beat yourself up over it. just find some fun things to do until they get back. And then listen to all the fun stories.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

livenlaugh
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 387
   Posted 8/31/2010 5:20 AM (GMT -7)   

I am sorry about the fair.  I do understand about the MP and how heavy it can be.  I also understand that sitting for long periods of time in a car and then for a show is so hard.  I also went to a fair last week.  I wasn't in a flare and had a moderately painful time.  I also had three young children with me who wanted to go on all the rides!  I managed to  only go on one.  All of us have been in this type of situation and sometimes we need to make sacrifices for our health but in the end it is worth it.  Sorry this sounds preachy.  Didn't mean for it to sound that way.  I hope you are feeling better and do something fun for yourself.  It doesn't happen too often that us mothers have time to ourselves.

Hugs,

Lisa


sotiredoffibro
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2010
Total Posts : 1556
   Posted 8/31/2010 6:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi luvsminis, Im sorry you didn't feel up to going but I want you to know that I totally understand and would have made the same choice for myself. I also know how hard it is to be left behind so like the others said treat yourself to something that makes you happy.
Gentle Hugs
Shirley
DX: Fibro, Gerds, COPD, Osteoarthritis, Osteoporosis, High Blood Pressure, and Depression.
When I get where Im going dont cry for me down here. (Brad Paisley & Dolly Parton)

Sherrine
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17101
   Posted 8/31/2010 8:12 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm sorry you didn't go.  I have amazed myself as to what I can do with fibro.  I have the stretching exercises embedded in my mind and use them anyplace.  I have gotten in pain doing things but I'm always happy I at least tried and I also have wonderful memories and fun, too.  Next time, reconsider.  It's too bad your hubby couldn't sit with you but you do need to be independent.  He can't always be with  you.
 
Try to have a little more faith in yourself.  I just bet you could do a lot more than you think you can.  It's amazing what you can do if you put your mind to it. You really don't want to miss out on life!  BUT, if you think you can't, then you can't.
 
I hope you start feeling better soon.
 
Sherrine

Forum Moderator/Fibromyalgia
************************
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

GSDgirl
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Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 1286
   Posted 8/31/2010 8:21 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi, I wouldn't call that whining, it is what it is.  We went to our County Fair 2 weeks ago and took 2 grandkids.  We were there for 7 hours.  I did not ride the crazy rides that I have been on with the 10 year old.  I opted for the kiddie rides with the 5 year old.  We took brakes and sat in the shade (not that the kids wanted to) more than a few times.  If I was in a flare I probably would not have gone.
 
The one big thing that I really hate is the fact that we just never know.  Many times I push through the pain and it gets my mind off of it.
 
Hubby is taking me to the Heinze Field Steeler Season Kick Off on Saturday.  Bret Michaels is playing a free concert and it is free to get into the stadium for the Rib Fest too.  I really hope I am not in a flare because my girlfriend and I have been canning and picking the garden for 2 weeks.  I have really liked Michaels since his Poison days so I am excited.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40592
   Posted 8/31/2010 9:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Denise,

I am really happy for you. I hope that you have a good time. You deserve that with all the work that you have been doing canning. You are going to really be enjoying all the goodies in the winter. I am jealous of you. I use to can like that, but not anymore. Though we are going to be making strawberry freezer jam here soon. We are almost out and have the berries in the freezer that we picked in June or July, I am not sure which.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Luvzminis
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 2568
   Posted 8/31/2010 11:13 AM (GMT -7)   
Just a FYI to give a lilttle more info...
 
I do push myself, in fact, on a daily basis.  If not, I would be either lying flat in bed or sacked out on the couch.  My main struggle is not only the fibro symptoms--I have a separate neuro condition as well, and that's mainly where the problem lies.  I get severe spasms to the point where, for example, my toes (or sometimes legs) cramp, and I can't undo them--even if I physically straighten them. When in a bad cramp, they literally spring back to the cramping position!  This would not be a pretty scene at a concert, and very disruptive to people around me, and likely to the band as well!  I know from experience (of others attending) that the seats are extremely hard --even for healthy individuals with no problems.  I've known people such as those who don't attend just because of the hard seats--hey, how much worse for those of us in pain, and highly sensitive to pressure--and 3 long hours?? This is a major flare just waiting to happen.  Would start in my buttocks and work through the legs.  It's even hard for me to sit a few minutes at a time on a pew in church, but I do it weekly, though I pay for it later.
 
Also, concerning the MP, I often get migraines, and have had a mild one all this week.  The noise level (seats are in row 9) is extremely likely to increase the chance of a worse migraine, experience tells me.  Unfortunately, my ears don't handle loud noises well, as they tend to get crackling noises, which are not pleasant, and obviously will contribute to the headache pain.
 
The reason I would prefer to sit by my husband is because I have a very poor sense of direction--get just about everything backwards!  Neither would it be a pretty scene to have me wander off to the bathroom and try to navigate back through hundreds, if not thousands of people! (Call the search dogs! :)) I also have a very hard time walking after being in a sitting position for any length of time.  The legs just don't want to work properly. An arm to lean on is very helpful!
 
Stretching exercises can help at times, but other times they cause my muscles to cramp and 'lock.' Then I have to wait for several (many) minutes until they 'undo' themselves.  In the meantime....?? One can't very well walk back and forth among the crowd just to undo the muscle knots. I don't think that would make me very popular there!
 
Sorry if this sounds negative, but it is what it is.  I intend to keep trying to 'be there' at any event I can, but this particular one would have my body just looking for trouble! :(
 
So--I really appreciate all the input/suggestions, but "been there, tried that" and that has been my experience, again and again, and believe me, I've tried to make such events 'work' til I'm blue in the face. I will definitely keep trying to make most events, however! I so agree that pushing through the pain is important, and I do that daily.  This particular event, however, is about much more than just pain, as you can see.
 
Thanks to all of you for being there!

it's a new day
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 8/31/2010 5:36 PM (GMT -7)   
Wow are you from Minnesota? 
I know your disappointment about not going to the State Fair. 
I didn't get there either.  I don't even consider things like that anymore.
Sometimes I can handle the fact that I must stay home
and sometimes I am extremely disappointed and sad.
Some people say just to push it and make yourself do it.
We are not all alike.  I push myself to do some of my housework and laundry.
Somedays I have to push myself to walk out and pick a tomato or feed the birds.
Just do what you can.  You know what you can and can't do.
There are just things I can no longer do, especially when it's really hot.
Hopefully, you can plan something that you will be able to do
and the family can go with you.
 

Luvzminis
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 2568
   Posted 8/31/2010 5:50 PM (GMT -7)   
Yes, I'm from Minnesota! :)
 
I agree with you.  What I try hard to do is to tentatively schedule things, although that can sometimes be disappointing.  We can only do what we're able.  However, I also believe it's good to challenge outselves--but only when we're really able to. I've sometimes pushed myself too much, and only ended up feeling miserable and asking myself "why did I do this??"
 
Looking back, I think I knew all along this would be too much for me.  If it were closer to home, as well as shorter in duration, it would probably be do-able. The long drive alone to the State Fair would be tiring, but I would be able to work out most of the stiffness once we got there by walking around.  Problem is that I don't think the show starts til 8PM--man, that's almost my 'bedtime' and my body has begun to shut down for the day by then. (My husband wants to get there before rush hour starts around 3PM, so it would be hours spent there.)
 
Yes, it's disappointing, but I'm hoping maybe their next show will be in Mankato, as I know they had one there previously.  That's closer to my home, and if it doesn't last 3 hours, I just might make it.
 
Thanks for your kind comments and hope you're doing well!  Yes--this heat is a little much.  Wish we could store it up for January, eh?? :)

GSDgirl
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 1286
   Posted 8/31/2010 6:24 PM (GMT -7)   
Luvsminis, please don't think I was judging you or how you handle things, that is not what I meant to do.  I was only saying what I do and not telling you what you should do.  If you took it the wrong way, I am sorry.  I can't always type how I mean things.

Acheybody
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 5929
   Posted 8/31/2010 6:37 PM (GMT -7)   
Now I feel stupid - but - what's an MP??

I also get the crackling in my ears with loud music - NOT FUN!  Sorry you didn't get to go...that's hard.  But hope you can enjoy yourself anyway.
 
Debbie

Luvzminis
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 2568
   Posted 8/31/2010 8:18 PM (GMT -7)   
No problem, GSDgirl--I do understand.  It's all good.
 
Debbie, 'MP' is menstrual period.  I should have typed it out--just trying to save time!

Sherrine
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17101
   Posted 9/1/2010 10:30 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm sorry if I upset you.  I was just trying to encourage you.  I've gone places when I've been in a lot of pain but was happy I did.  I thought, when going, that I was making a big mistake but found that I was really able to do what I wanted to do!  That's what I was trying to get across.  As far as mentioning the hubby, my husband helped me a lot and then he died suddenly and I had to figure out how to do things myself.  It is good be be independent.
 
Hopefully you can see the concert at another time.
 
Sherrine
Forum Moderator/Fibromyalgia
************************
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

Luvzminis
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 2568
   Posted 9/1/2010 11:11 AM (GMT -7)   
No problem, Sherrine, and I do understand.  God bless!

it's a new day
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 9/2/2010 7:27 AM (GMT -7)   
If Weird Al come to Mankato we'll go together!

Sheila1366
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 384
   Posted 9/2/2010 8:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Sorry you weren't able to go. I sure can relate. Hard to plan anything when there is always a chance for a flare. Just be sure and do something special for you.
Fibromyalgia,arthritis,raynauds syndrome,gastroparesis,IBS,depression,severe costochondritis, generalized anxiety disorder
 
God and Family is my life.

Luvzminis
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 2568
   Posted 9/2/2010 9:51 AM (GMT -7)   
To:  "It's a new day" (love that thought, BTW!):
Wouldn't it be cool if Al would come to Mankato?  I know he has in the past, but a few years back.
 
I don't regret my decision not to go.  It gave me time to think and sort out.   I did make a positive decision:  will try hard to make the next concert, but I know I'll have to be on my "heavier duty" drugs (Flexeril, mostly) or the day or days after would be miserable.  Already told my husband I'll have to take something strong like that med if I hope to sit through it in peace. He's a good guy, but is the type who won't even take an aspirin for major pain!
 
So let's work on Weird Al to get to Mankato! Love your suggestion!  I know of several people who would attend a Mankato "Al" concert, so I think I'll contact via his website.  The more input they get before deciding where to go next concert, the better!  He's working on another 'album,' su I suspect in a year or two he'll do another tour. 
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