Amee, thank you so much for updating us. I'm glad you know that your MIL's situation is not your fault. It is her own fault. I hope BIL will make the right decision to let her go. She deserves to be at peace and that was her wish, not to be sustained by extraordinary measures.
I know how difficult this is for all of you and hope that you will soon have some closure.
Amee, in a way this is the toughest part--waiting for it to be over. It's surprising how long some people can live once taken off life support. That is what caused the push to withhold tube feedings, etc. Has everything been withdrawn from her except pain meds?
Amee, I know what you mean by the spirit no longer being there. When my aunt died in Dec., she was already "gone" the day before. She was nearly comatose. I could tell that only her body was hanging on. Even the day before that, she was unable to speak--just mumbled something I couldn't understand--and just looked so miserable that I cried when I left the room and prayed to God that she would not linger on and on. She was a very special person--loved life and people and was always joking around, despite not being able to walk (result of an accident at 13.) I knew she was miserable just laying there.
I pray your family's ordeal will soon be over, and so will MIL's.
Amee, I was thinking of you today and wondering if your MIL had passed yet. I was going to post and then got a LD phone call that distracted me. So thank you for posting and letting us know. I'm so glad that she went peacefully and the funeral was uneventful.
Remember that you are always welcome here. You have a lot of experience to share with others who are going through what you have been through. So don't be a stranger.
Amee, your experience can be a great help to others. So what you went through will not have been for nothing. I am sure that right now you just want your life to get back to "normal," though.