Sandi, I hope Thanksgiving went well. And Happy Birthday! I just wanted to comment on the "spot" on Mike's liver. My last CT scan showed the same (1.5 cm..a mm is much smaller.) I had a huge liver tumor in '05 (12 x 11.5 cm) that necessitated removal of the rt. lobe of my liver. So I only have the left lobe now and get scanned about every 6 mos. I just wanted to mention that Mayo never biopsies me. They do an MRI with IV Gadolinium. That particular contrast makes any cancer "light up like a Christmas tree," I was told. I am having this done Dec. 11th (have had several previously.) You might ask if this could be done instead of biopsy. A biopsy is an invasive procedure and better off not done if there is an alternative available.
Sandi, so glad you had a good Thanksgiving and birthday! And that Mike is enjoying the tree. I love having a big tree, but stopped doing it 2 yrs. ago...just physically impossible for me now.
Someone in that x-ray dept. is full of it, as an MRI with the proper contrast medium can take pictures of any body part/organ/etc.
Even if grief counseling were your specialty, you are too close to the situation. Mike needs someone who can be caring and compassionate and listen to him, but not break down. That would be expecting too much of you.
I hope all this works out for you both.
They are certainly not going to bend over backwards for him if they know he is still drinking. They consider it a waste of their time. He DOES know that he cannot drink even one can a month once he starts AA or counseling, doesn't he? He is going to have to give it up, if he expects to receive a transplant...although the idea is "one day at a time" because it's too difficult for an alcoholic, especially a practicing one, to accept the idea of never drinking again--and because none of us can guarantee we will NEVER drink again. I went to AA with the notion that everyone who goes remains sober ever after. Boy, did I learn differently. And I also learned that some of my "heroes" with 10, 20, and more years of sobriety were not immune to a "slip." But those who are sincere know they must commit to sobriety "one day at a time," and there can't be any underlying thoughts of "just one" or "nobody will know," etc. AA or counseling will never work if an alcoholic is still drinking...or smoking weed, or whatever. No mind-altering substances at all.
Hi, Logan! Congratulations on your transplant! And welcome to the forum. I hope you will come back often, as we need members who have actually gone through transplant.
Sandi, I know that AA isn't the only way, but I do think it's the best way. However, if someone isn't willing to go and at least try it, you cannot force them. Nor do you have any power over whether Mike drinks or not. I am fully aware of that and glad that you are, also. Many transplant centers do offer counseling as an alternative to AA. Since a transplant is not an option for Mike, then there's no point in discussing either one, except for others who may be reading this. We have many "lurkers" who read posts and never do post, or maybe are encouraged to post by something they have read. So answers many times are not directed just to you...or even directly to you...but are for general info. However, people suffering with liver disease, who are doing everything required of them (including total abstinence), do get a little riled up by someone who apparently isn't as motivated to save his life.
You are handling the situation the best way you can, and that is all you can really do.
Sandi, I'm so sorry you feel that way. I hope you change your mind. I know you are dealing with his upcoming biopsy, to which I posted that you should ask about an MRI with Gadolinium, which will show if the mass is cancerous. An AFT (alpha fetoprotein) level can also be an indicator of cancer.
I will still pray that the biopsy is negative for cancer.
Post Edited (hep93) : 12/5/2009 10:39:39 PM (GMT-7)